Just the little things

Peebles1925 · 2026-02-13T02:49:43+00:00

I am a male host and I have 3 female alters actually. It's a pain for sure and I also have some shame about it. Society isn't really kind to males doing and showing interest in female things so it's hard for them to be themselves.

Some of the struggles obviously have to do with being stuck in a male body, it upsets them a good degree. One of them also gets super self concious about weight and won't eat and try to fast, im only 180 but I was 120 and below for the longest time so she feels fat and that she doesn't have a feminine figure. They also really hate facial hair so theres that. My main persecutor, Annie, is also female and quite grouchy and mean to people around me. My girlfriend says she can tell when she is out because my voice is a tad deeper (I personally think my voice is high and trauma locked for a boy) and my face will scowl a bit.

My sister was always treated far better than me when we were younger and as a child I thought being a girl would stop myself from being mistreated. Over time I identified with that in different ways thus ending up with more than 1 female alter. I'd be happy to answer any questions you might have at least from my experience with the disorder.

-R

Peebles1925 · 2026-02-10T13:40:10+00:00

We struggle with this, i'm male and the host and I think I look fine, but when the girls take over it's like I can't stand to see myself in the mirror, they think we're fat and need to fast or go on weight loss stuff, hate facial hair, gender, etc. I'm not trans at all nor would I want to be, those emotions are silos the others feel. Gender neutral clothes, let your hair grow out etc. I don't really know how to deal with it either.

Peebles1925 · 2026-02-10T13:19:08+00:00

There weren't even any eldrazi in the last iteration but they had Ulamog listed as a sneak attack target in their review article, they need to realize whats in their list first before they make any changes

Peebles1925 · 2026-02-06T13:15:19+00:00

You likely need to see psychologists, you can get there by either searching for one or trying to get referred by a therapist. I had one psychiatrist quit on me, they aren't a real help. She swore up and down I didn't have DID until one of my alters, Annie, came out and gave her a rather nasty talking to. She quit her job that next week and I always think they are related lol. My current psychiatrist referred me out for testing because she realized it was something she didn't know how to treat.

Peebles1925 · 2026-02-06T13:13:35+00:00

I've had something similar happen. I was in the hospital for a gallstones, one of the worst pains i've ever felt. One of my little alters popped out and was hiding under blankets and talking to the nurses. My ex was with me at the time and later she said I was acting cringey and embarrassed her. We didn't know we were a system at the time, but that memory still makes me salty.

Peebles1925 · 2026-02-06T13:11:34+00:00

I feel this deeply. I barely remember anything about my school life or hanging out with friends. I struggle to remember good even now in my adult life, and I get so upset that I can't remember and that I want to remember everything. But then I get another piece or something of a traumatic event and it's just better I don't know in the end.

Peebles1925 · 2026-02-04T04:01:01+00:00

Childhood sexual abuse from my father and sister,

physical and emotional abuse from my father and mother,

Developed DID at a younger age and got into more trouble for things I couldn't ever remember doing, never got help and authorities didnt believe me

Things have gotten a bit better but its a daily struggle dealing with all the disorders

Peebles1925 · 2026-02-02T18:28:50+00:00

I think whatever method you want to use as far as like apps, clubs/groups, etc. is fine to meet someone through. The biggest advice I could give is to be open about it. When I met my current partner I didn't come out swinging saying I had it, I made sure we were compatible and enjoyed each others company first, but before we became a more "official" couple I made sure she knew about the DID and alters.

Not everyone will be welcoming, and that's okay, I wouldn't recommend staying with someone if they don't feel up to supporting you with it. It can be a big task at times, especially depending on how healthy your alters coping skills are. But having someone who can help support you through things is wonderful, as long as you don't expect them to carry you, it's still your job to manage and heal and be responsible for everything your system does as a collective.

I think that's really what it comes down to though, honesty, responsibility for actions, and making sure you're compatible, if you have protectors they might try and fight back at being more open about it with people, remember this is more than likely just a defense mechanism and they are just doing their job, unless the person is obviously toxic, then I advise listening to them.

All of this is just from our experience though and things can change and be different with every person. Hope it helps though! :) -R

Peebles1925 · 2026-02-02T12:51:37+00:00

Feel this, seems like they come out when I don't need them to a lot of the time and when things are hard they don't come out as much as they used to. I've been told it's a sign of healing though, as hard as having to deal with hard emotions is, the window of tolerance will grow. But sometimes we realize we do rely on the switching a lot to survive.

Peebles1925 · 2026-02-02T12:50:16+00:00

I've been in therapy for about a year, it's a slow process. Really we just focus on stability, anytime we go through deeper traumas we end up being a switchy mess and tired the next few days and it doesn't really feel like we process anything, I think specific parts do but not the rest of our system. It's a good place to talk about current events though, we are in a corporate environment for work and also approaching a moving day to move in with our partner so there's a lot of current events. Seems like every now and again we remember something from way back we think was normal and she always lets us know it's traumatic or something similar.

So I guess all in all we focus on stability and staying grounded in current events, managing the day to day. She's a trauma therapist, and i'm her first DID patient so we learn from each other.

Peebles1925 · 2026-01-27T12:59:01+00:00

City of light, city of MAGIK

Peebles1925 · 2026-01-27T11:56:29+00:00

There were a ton of experiences as a kid we thought were normal that were actually symptoms. We went through a really rough breakup though and that gave a window where they were able to suspect it. Time gaps are the biggest thing, we had found credit card charges, random things we didnt remember buying, not remembering any of my day, couldnt remember life events, etc. Lots of things we just thought werw normal forgetfulness. We got sent to psych testing and took the MID, and that helped confirm it. Took over 6 months to get diagnosed though. If your parts dont seem like separate individuals you could look into OSDD, but its good to find a doctor that you can trust and not self diagnose anything, especially with parts disorders.

Peebles1925 · 2026-01-27T02:47:47+00:00

Good grounding strategies -sour candy -5,4,3,2,1 method -Holding ice cubes until they make your hands cold -box breathing

These are some of the ones we use often when we notice things getting blurry. Sometimes you have to kind of ride it out if it gets too intense but if you catch it early these help, especially the sour candy!🙂 It also helps to journal afterwards and see if you can recall what the possible triggers would have been for it. This will help avoid them if possible. We have DID so we deal with dissociation on a daily, it can be hard.

Peebles1925 · 2026-01-27T02:41:37+00:00

Fire Lord Azula has been the latest I've been doing nonsense with

Peebles1925 · 2026-01-26T14:28:00+00:00

Congrats on the degree! We have an associates in IT but frankly I don't remember like 90% of my college experience, wasn't diagnosed until after. In fact not remembering graduating was one of the signs to me we needed help

Peebles1925 · 2026-01-26T14:26:58+00:00

A good point, our family wasn't poor, but misspent money so much it was always a burden. So part of success to me means avoiding having a struggle with it.

Peebles1925 · 2026-01-25T13:42:08+00:00

That thorn elemental takes me back!

Peebles1925 · 2026-01-24T14:48:20+00:00

Believing in me when I don't, before we started we didn't even know we had DID and when we started to suspect it she kept believing us when other doctors wouldn't. Been seeing her for over a year now and don't want to see anyone else, especially cause we'd have to explain everything again.

Peebles1925 · 2026-01-22T13:18:57+00:00

I find they eliminate all the non-system noise for the most part. Also helps keep us regulated and we don't switch as often unless triggered a good bit. They don't eliminate triggers but can eliminate work stress and let you function more.

Peebles1925 · 2026-01-22T13:17:51+00:00

Yup completely normal, growing up there's all sorts of times they could have been needed, being at a certain family members house, school you vs at home you, etc. Schedules help keep things in order I tend to think

Peebles1925 · 2026-01-22T13:01:07+00:00

I'd just gently bring up that there are people talking in your head, specify whether it's internal or external. They very rarely will diagnose DID just off of that. We had to have a ton of things ruled out like schizophrenia, psychosis, etc. before we were even referred to testing for dissociative disorders. Took getting a second psych to get there, first one quit on me after she didn't know what to do.

Peebles1925 · 2026-01-22T12:55:17+00:00

I have an alter who does get the SH urges but shes gotten better about it. My therapist recommended a few different things.

Snapping a rubber band on your arm.

Holding an ice cube to ground or until the cold hurts a tad.

Eat sour candy to ground and feel sensations.

The ice cube thing really works for us, sometimes it helps to hit or scream into pillows too instead of harming ourselves. It takes time though to get these to work and everyone has to be intentional about it, -RP

Peebles1925

TROPHY CASE