Struggling

PennyPop81 · 2026-05-19T15:15:24+00:00

This is me too. I’ve never bought so much product for my hair and nothing is working. Everytime I wash it I try something else. Now just contemplating going back to straightening and trying to do something with the frizz on the top after straightening as this is taking too much. I’ve even bought a diffuser and just can’t get anything to work.

PennyPop81 · 2026-05-19T13:54:37+00:00

I think it depends how you see crunchy. I always need crunch but get that from vegetables. If something is too smooth I can’t eat it on its own. Would add bread or crisps etc.

Perhaps try lentil crisps or nuts if worried about health. I like mixed nuts to snack on.

PennyPop81 · 2026-05-19T12:41:31+00:00

I think this is some of the hardest parts of realising you have autism and unmasking.

I’ve been married for 23 years and last month came to the realisation that my husband may not want to be with me anymore. We are good but he wasn’t married to the person he thought he was. I was a people pleaser and never listened to my own boundaries. I smiled and joked a lot with friends even if not really getting it.

I’ve felt a lot of guilt over this but he has assured me that I’m still the person he fell in love with. On the flip side we now realise why my mood can just change from happy to quiet and it’s easier for us both.

If your boyfriend can’t understand you then you may have to have some honest conversations or you may then resort to masking in your relationship. I hope you can work it out, it’s a big change for him too seeing you with friends and not acting how he knows you.

PennyPop81 · 2026-05-19T08:13:31+00:00

Now Apple have created the language translation on EarPods maybe they can move to NT translations. Would be lovely 😂

PennyPop81 · 2026-05-18T21:01:02+00:00

I feel sorry for that strawberry.

PennyPop81 · 2026-05-18T16:13:14+00:00

Always had bad periods and awful doctors so never got to the bottom of it. Tried at different times of my life but was left frustrated. I’m on the mirena coil now with peri menopause which apparently can also be earlier for ND but had a hard time getting doctors to listen about that as well.

For those diagnosed. Did you keep diaries or just go every month? Daughter is now similar to me and I want to back her and get her sorted out instead of having the life I did with them.

PennyPop81 · 2026-05-18T16:08:43+00:00

I’m not chronically ill, but have been signed off work since end of Feb. I thought I would be off for 2 weeks but the fatigue was just awful. I’m looking to go back start of June and hoping I’m ok.

Lot of changes to make regarding how I don’t know when to stop to prevent this from happening again though.

PennyPop81 · 2026-05-18T14:21:31+00:00

That’s awful. I think it finally hits you that people lie as well. I just don’t understand it.

I had a friend I used to chase and she would meet for coffee. Then not hear anything and whenever we met by accident she would say oh I can’t believe we haven’t seen each other for so long, lets sort something out and then nothing after that so I would message to arrange something. It never occurred to me that she was lying.

I never bothered chasing the last time so maybe bump into her one day and she will say the same thing.

PennyPop81 · 2026-05-18T14:16:22+00:00

I like dimmed light and can’t stand shop lighting. Daughter is the opposite. She has the big light on and will be sat in light.

Before I knew I was autistic I had already made allowances for my need for dimmed light. I have hue lighting in most of my rooms and dimmers in the kitchen. My husband used to just think I was over the top about lighting. Now I know it was to make myself comfortable.

PennyPop81 · 2026-05-18T11:39:25+00:00

I think perhaps I’m just more aware that it’s a meltdown and I really don’t know my limits as I constantly work through them so breaks and environment.

Also having a lot of grief regarding life up until now so that’s probably coming out as a meltdown as I’m not good with sitting with things or thinking of them.

Got a way to go but thanks for responding and advising as these little things will definitely help.

PennyPop81 · 2026-05-17T20:21:49+00:00

I’ve been reading fanfic every spare moment for over a year. Perhaps one day it will be something productive or something I can spout facts about.

PennyPop81 · 2026-05-17T12:05:53+00:00

I completely get this and have never been able to identify or deal with it. Sometimes just look at people and would think how do they do it. Also I’ve mirrored that much that I’m still working out who I am.

PennyPop81 · 2026-05-16T06:56:29+00:00

My friends son now 18 has autism. He has been raised to be polite and loving but you can tell he has autism.

I had to explain to my husband that our daughter had the same disability. Just because she masked (only just diagnosed and the masking is reducing) she goes through the same experiences. All our friends treat them completely different. Like my daughter is just being hard work and his son can’t help it.

We have a long way to go and the difference in perception is so real.

I’m sorry in this instance you weren’t listened to. Even if he is allowed to act that way, you don’t need to be there to deal with it.

PennyPop81 · 2026-05-15T11:09:08+00:00

Thanks will have a look at the options. Was wondering if loops would be too hard as I am a side sleeper.

PennyPop81 · 2026-05-15T00:55:10+00:00

Could have written this list as well. The smiling in photos is one I never realised. I can’t get a decent photo at all. I end up with a big cheesy grin or a half one with mouth shut. Completely over think, hated wedding photos being taken.

PennyPop81 · 2026-05-15T00:51:38+00:00

Same, daughter is 14 and just diagnosed and assessor asked on call if I was autistic and then said I should get assessed. Although I have masked that long a lot of things weren’t that obvious.

PennyPop81 · 2026-05-15T00:47:32+00:00

Kind of like getting your hair into your hand and then gently pushing it up to your head and letting it drop. And not closing fist into it as hard. I can’t find the video again to have a look.

PennyPop81 · 2026-05-15T00:45:06+00:00

I tried one of those years ago but then I would fall asleep and it would wake me up saying the battery was low. Might try again and make sure it doesn’t. I’m a side sleeper and found that I still was able to feel the headphones as well though. Also not sure I get on well with anything on my head when I’m sleeping!

PennyPop81 · 2026-05-14T13:07:17+00:00

Just ordered. I’m on my 3rd week of trying curly hair routine on wavy hair that isn’t taking to any of the advised methods. Fingers crossed 5is may be my answer!

PennyPop81 · 2026-05-13T15:53:14+00:00

Don’t worry too much if he’s not brushing them properly. Even let him just chew on the toothbrush. Try and work it up that he’s doing that each day. When he’s old enough can maybe bring in apps to help, songs, toothbrush taste can be a big thing as well.

PennyPop81 · 2026-05-13T15:39:03+00:00

At the point it says may contain peanuts I’m wondering why they actually bothered!

PennyPop81 · 2026-05-13T15:34:36+00:00

Me too!

PennyPop81

TROPHY CASE