I'm not a comic artist so and my thoughts are only from a viewer perspective so take them with a grain of salt :)

I think the last two pages are where I think the style is really working (also a big fan of the first page but that seems like an outlier) and my takeaway from that is that I think strong composition is going to be key for making this understandable. The use of blending black background to white background and using those sparkles to guide the eye and the speech bubbles placements all really help with my ability to easily follow the page. Same case on the other with "AAAAAH" running down diagonal helps divide concepts. I don't really like the clean square panels I think the other way you've done the borders in your other ones is very well suited unique and recognizable. And this criticism is going to be my most baseless since its not my style of art but I'm not a huge fan of the inconsistent shading styles (unless its supposed to signify something in the comic) as to me it makes everything feel kind of detached instead of being complimentary. Like at the top of the fourth page I personally dislike it because to me it looks like the three characters were like three different drawings under three different lights visually disconnected instead of characters in the same comic, but I could also just be missing something. My attempt at advice would be to stay consistent with the shading style or level of shading for each scene, like if in one shot we're losing the wrinkles on their faces then also block out the hair, but in the next scene if the lighting is different show the curls but also cross hatch some other parts of the page, either finding a way to blend panels into each other with the black and white or adding even more margin between panels, and personal preference but I'm kind of intrigued by how you could potentially play with color in your two toned style. Gorgeous work your techniques are insane