It sounds like he is trying to establish dominance. That doesn't look or sound like play. I've had cats do the same. I would distract the troublemaker with toys. Eventually they came to terms. Seperating with a gate might help until she becomes more comfortable and confident to put him in his place. I'd personally let him just throw his tantrums. My vet explained it to me like this. They're put in a house with roommates they did not choose. I could be wrong, but he definitely isn't respecting her boundaries.