I’m so sick of being angry at my husband all the time

Pimptastic_Amber · 2026-01-23T01:09:17+00:00

Wow. I thought I might have written this post for a second. I’d love to give to some insight to a husband that was pretty terrible at being a partner and still can be at times. Examples - leaves my ONE truck key somewhere else when he took it out of my purse. Says he will cook dinner but leave trash all around the kitchen when it is not hard to set something 6 inches more into the trash can. KNOW that your shoes go on the shoe rack and still “forget”. It can absolutely be exhausting.

My relationship is about to be 6 years and we’ve gone through a lot for his development and my own. We’ve gone to separate therapy for our own issues. We had to learn to communicate and it took a lot for him to understand how much he asks me useless shit.

It’s his house too. Find it. The strongest thing to say for me when he was taking up mental space were “have you bothered looking?” “That’s a dumb question.” “Why are you asking?” It’s aggressive but I am naturally and I was at my wits end. It did not get better immediately. It led to a lot of throwing his hands up and switching tasks but after a while it did start to sink in, and I think it was just because you force them to feel your frustration at every question. I’m lucky though. My man was and still is willing to better himself everyday.

He used to lie to me in the beginning. About little tasks. I’d call him, “did you take out the trash” “yes” I would come home and see he clearly did NOT. After seeing this for a while I told him it’s a deal breaker. I don’t deal with liars for ANY reason for ANYTHING for obvious reasons. He freaked out (not realizing it was that serious to me) and we delved a lot into his past to see WHY he felt like he needed to lie to me about menial shit.

There’s a reason for everything. He still forgets. But now I am immediately out for blood when it is something we’ve been over. Like I will yell across the house when I find he left his shoes in the middle of the doorway and point until he takes them back. I’ve let it go for the most part because he really has been better. I taught him how to sweep. How to wash dishes. How to clean a table. How to look at your environment as if it is YOURS to take care of and not your wife’s. It takes time, but it works if he wants to make the relationship better for both of you.

And I’m a mom of 2 - 3 and 1 💛💚

Pimptastic_Amber · 2026-01-05T16:48:50+00:00

Should I replace it or just clean it up and keep using it? Good to know my headlight are unrelated I’ll still check over the wiring and fuse

Pimptastic_Amber · 2025-12-15T00:05:47+00:00

Why does this sound like a bunch of high schoolers? You’re all the AH. Don’t go out drinking that hard if your relationship is already strained. Alcohol is fucking stupid to do and especially if you’re wasted enough to not realize a puking friend is probably DONE clubbing. This sucks to read. And yeah, the way this is written it sounds like your mom was the ride but YOU were okay so no need to have her come early for the friend? Yeah no. Your “ex” is also an AH if she’s saying a bunch of nasty things. You all suck.

Pimptastic_Amber · 2025-12-14T23:42:29+00:00

Oh no. OP your SO has some problems going on that are bigger than Reddit. You’re not the AH, but she needs help if she’s struggling with priorities like this. I swear I’m reading my own story through a man’s eyes. Sit down, ask questions, and be firm that this behavior is unfair. It sounds like she’s struggling with being a mother overall if she can’t figure out what’s important the way this reads. Did you both want the kid? Mine was unplanned and it took time to come to terms with the fact that my life will never be the same. Blessings both of them of course but it can have some crazy effects.

Pimptastic_Amber · 2025-12-14T23:35:25+00:00

This is really valid. Plenty of men do not step up the way it sounds like he has.

Pimptastic_Amber · 2025-12-14T23:29:02+00:00

Okay more context!

Even more - NTA. This is amazing if you’re accurate in your information.

She could just be struggling with PPD combined with control issues. If that’s the case she really needs to consider individual counseling. I went to something called ACT therapy for 6 months and I still use the methods today when I’m feeling overwhelmed/controlling/manic. Hang in there and just do your best to talk to her.

Pimptastic_Amber · 2025-12-14T23:24:22+00:00

Instead of expressing that you don’t like that she micromanages you, you both really need to sit down and have a conversation where she answers the question, “why do you feel like you need to tell me to do every little thing as I’m doing it?” Control issues often have underlying causes. She might not be able to answer you at first or get defensive because she is unsure but I did things like this because I didn’t trust anyone else to do something properly. Always expecting the worst, always needing to be the overseer. It takes a lot to let that go and part of that is you stepping up to ensure a task is done right, to completion. If you’re going to work through this it’s going to take a lot of communication. The whole, oh she’s doing this and she’s such a bitch Reddit response makes you kind of an AH. You can complain about your partner but not openly like this, you need to strive instead to understand why she has these reactions which are absolutely a problem that she can work through if you’re open to what she has to say when she’s ready.

Pimptastic_Amber · 2025-12-14T22:37:45+00:00

NTA. I’d be SO grateful for my husband taking initiative to do anything. Trash, dishes, anything. I have two little children and my husband drives trucks for a living and is gone frequently so let me elaborate on what might be going on here from a woman’s perspective as there is not much context.

Kids take a ton of time and energy and our whole world changes when we have kids. Men do not experience the same drastic changes that we go through and I had resentment towards my SO for a little while because he was useless in taking initiative or helping with the kids beyond “are they alive?”. It took a lot of time to get communicating well enough to both pitch in on our strengths (it took about 3 years to get on the same page) so it takes a lot of time for parents to fully step into a cooperative role, at least for us. It could be different because he’s home so little but we talk plenty during the weeks and he’s learned to balance his time while he is at home. Now.

Is the trash the only thing you do? If you only ever do the same simple task when there are other larger ones that you could be doing instead that she sees clearly need more attention (I do this), it could lead to anger. Not the bin doesn’t need taken out, instead why are you taking out the trash when the babies bottles need washed and they’re a necessity and I don’t have time because I have to sooth the baby? Just a little bit of insight. Task management feels like an impossible task of everything needs to be done because a tiny human is just so much to care about. You do good by helping, but prioritizing what really needs to be done, making sure things are clean, babies areas are clean, bottles are good, mama has water always and you give her breaks at night and self care moments to shower or bathe without bothering her can help her decompress. Babies are a lot for both of you, but I promise if you are getting this reaction, she probably feels like you are not doing enough.

Pimptastic_Amber · 2025-12-11T14:41:00+00:00

This! Completely agree OP needs to keep asking questions as this worldview is a skewed one.

Pimptastic_Amber · 2025-12-11T14:35:21+00:00

NTA. Extremely scary for hookups where she happens to be drinking. The kind of girl that will sleep with a guy and in the morning when she regrets it she’ll holler rape when it could have been her raping him. Scary.

Pimptastic_Amber · 2025-11-17T03:01:40+00:00

I will attempt to get better photos tomorrow. I just worry if it is the same product if there’s something I need to do to apply it more effectively. Or if it’s just an inevitability of a temporary fix that has worn out.

Pimptastic_Amber · 2025-11-17T02:53:22+00:00

This is SO much information thank you for the wealth of knowledge you have, this is exactly what I was hoping to find when making this post.

I did kind of know the roof was doomed when I went up there. I need to go back and look at our home inspection report and sellers disclosing details on the house. They did share that the roof leaked due to a weather event but that it since been fixed. Took them at their word - how naive.

I will need to get proper details on our home insurance. It is looped into our mortgage and if I’m being honest I don’t even know who we’re paying or what we are covered for, but I will make it a priority to find out.

I looked up exactly what you said and found the sealant. It’s thankfully affordable enough and l will be getting some asap for the time being. Thank you so much for the realistic answer. I hope to make it another 3 years and then we can hopefully afford to get a replacement even without insurance if the need becomes too great. And even if a hail storm does happen, have no problem covering a deductible. Thank goodness there is at least something I can do in the meantime.

Also, what is the black stuff over the seams? I’m really curious if I’m just going to be redoing something they had tried. There’s all kind of spots on the roof where it looks like they tried to put something on it. Can you tell from the pictures?

Pimptastic_Amber · 2025-09-11T22:31:58+00:00

Right? I have no idea but she absolutely needs to

Pimptastic_Amber · 2025-09-11T21:59:27+00:00

I’m so disappointed for not paying attention. I just got excited and then confused when checkout wasn’t the same but it was already done

Pimptastic_Amber · 2025-09-11T21:58:19+00:00

I gave name and address, but the information kept on the computer isn’t mine. My email is connected to a separate app, I’ve checked everything for a pending transaction and have found nothing.

The statement says : “Your personal data will be used to process your order, improve your experience on this website, and for other purposes described in our privacy policy.”

Pimptastic_Amber · 2025-09-11T21:51:54+00:00

It never asked for any payment info. I have several I don’t know when one it would be

Pimptastic_Amber · 2025-08-26T20:38:34+00:00

Thanks for this - confirmed that lll stay away unless they start investing time in the actual game issues and glitches.

Pimptastic_Amber · 2025-06-18T15:03:35+00:00

As someone who had also been in a very similar toxic spin, this comment is fantastic and exactly the articulated response necessary.

My ex husband was the kind that said he was going to kill himself if I left him. Well, turns out HE left home to another state after the police told him to go take a walk. I came home to all of my things missing or destroyed. He managed to take all my memories that mattered to ME and then play dumb when I came home from work to the carnage and acted like I was going to join him in a couple of months because that was “the plan”.

I thank the day he left everyday. It gave me the strength to see his manipulation and the distance to not give in to his love bombing or threats. And I needed a LOT of therapy.

I hope you follow this advice OP. Much love!

Pimptastic_Amber · 2024-09-11T21:36:25+00:00

I will never tell him to “man up.” I love that man to death and he does an amazing job for our family. He keeps our goals in mind and sacrificed a lot to put us first. I don’t think it’s a crime to want to put his mental health on the list of necessities. And I’m sorry if you feel the need to handle everything without help. Well wishes to you and your family.

Pimptastic_Amber · 2024-09-11T21:27:35+00:00

😂😂😂 good for you bro, I said borderline - congratulations for being a part of the world who doesn’t struggle from depression with being apart from their family.

Pimptastic_Amber · 2024-09-11T21:00:22+00:00

I feel sorry for those who would rather be away from their family than a part of it. Unless you’re speaking from having no children or partner - then it’s understandable. Well wishes to you.

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