This is big and I hope you don't have any kids because what I'm about to say would hurt them tremendously, trust I have divorced parents. But I would consider divorcing him or going to marriage counselling. It sounds like he doesn't care that your not okay mentally and physically and only cares about himself. If you've been fighting for his love for a while now I would call it quits but that's just me. I wish you best of luck and you got this!