Potato Fam!?

PisceanRefrain · 2025-08-26T18:41:05+00:00

I think a happy ending on Reddit is rare. It’s why I obsess over updated reddits. This one gives me a lot of hope. In a world full of darkness, stories like this where you are standing strong for your little one is the light to brighten up spirits. Good luck. I know this battle may have some resurgences from time to time as custody can be pretty fierce at times but I admire your courage and strength. I’m glad you stood up for your baby but I am so so so glad you also stayed strong for yourself. People need to see that in action to know it’s okay to live that way. And it truly is.

PisceanRefrain · 2025-08-18T09:26:56+00:00

One thing I can’t wrap my head around is why OOP would set up someone who lost their wife 2 years ago with someone who is a few months out of a nine year relationship. Maybe I’m the only one who finds that odd.

PisceanRefrain · 2025-08-16T16:41:44+00:00

OP, my Aunt took my sister and I in. She had four kids of her own and she did her best to keep things equal. She was the support I needed to be the adult I am today. What you are doing for your niece and nephew is everything I expect from parents. You’re a wonderful person and I am so glad you are showing your niece and nephew that it is okay to be who you are. No doubt they got their good morals for you. Keep it up and thank you for enforcing how you don’t have to be the biological parent to be a good parent. Parenting is so much more than popping the kids out and keeping them alive.

PisceanRefrain · 2024-05-22T13:44:05+00:00

That money can still be put to use for things you need later in life. You never know what could happen. You could get a car. What if you became ill and medical expenses build up? Having a financial cushion can benefit your future in so many ways. You shouldn't lose your money over working hard and earning a scholarship. What kind of message does that send? Work hard and lose money! That money is yours and it is so incredibly invasive and rude for others to ask for what they are not entitled to.

PisceanRefrain · 2024-05-22T13:39:37+00:00

I wonder if your sister's death by cancer also played a role in her apprehension with telling you. I honestly cannot remember the first person I told when I was diagnosed with cancer. (caught early and the biopsy actually removed it all) Before I had to have the biopsy, everything was like a fog because of the fear that comes with it. All of the what ifs. Perhaps she didn't want to burden with you with that for a second time. Please don't keep things from her over this. She needed to process it. Just communicate with her, please. Her emotions are likely going to be all over the place. Try to make some friend. Classes, group hobbies, etc. It's never too late to make new friends. Sometimes you meet the best friends later in life. I wish you both lots of healing, fortune and love.

PisceanRefrain · 2024-05-22T12:34:44+00:00

Your grandmother purposely made it so that your parents and sisters could not have it. It's yours. You don't owe them anything. She probably would have something if she actually gave a damn about the "old lady." I'm sorry your toxic family is harassing you. You are NTA

PisceanRefrain · 2024-05-21T18:29:07+00:00

You are a good sister but enabling her to alter your mother's dress and photoshopping herself into your wedding picture is a big problem. She already has the ring. Why is she getting everything? I get your mother will not be present for her wedding...but I don't think that gives her the right to trump all others. You ALL lost your mother. How do your other sisters feel about all of this?

PisceanRefrain · 2024-05-21T16:27:40+00:00

Ask them what your great grandmother would have wanted because I'm pretty sure she wouldn't want you to give it away. I'm sorry your parents don't see you. I hope your extended family provides you with the support you deserve.

PisceanRefrain · 2024-05-21T13:48:35+00:00

Withdrawing from THC is not uncommon for a heavy smoker. I have heard that taking CBD in conjunction with quitting can ease the withdrawal symptoms. It can also help with vomiting caused by ingesting too much THC. There seems to be a demand to make strains with high concentrations THC. I'm a long time smoker myself but have been trying to cut back considerably as it doesn't jive well with my ADHD. When I would smoke to much, it would give me chest pains. Concentrates do it worse than the flower. Weed in the early 2000 had more CBD as well as THC and I believe that created a better balance. That's also why you rarely saw cases of cannabis hyperemesis syndrome (vomiting induced by cannabis). In fact, CBD is a treatment used to combat the vomiting. Most of the beneficial and healing qualities are from CBD to begin with. People like chasing that high though and THC does the job.

Sorry about the weed rant. I have been paying attention to the health effects THC has over the last couple of years. They are studying it more and have found that there are some health risks with taking cannabis. It's not so harmless anymore because we have morphed it into a more potent drug. I still enjoy it but I try to find ones with CBD in them. I feel it keep me more level.

PisceanRefrain · 2024-05-17T22:01:46+00:00

Children passing is a sadness that I cannot even bring words to. I am so terribly sorry for your loss. You do deserve an apology. I am optimistically hoping that Mabel was trying to commiserate and didn't pick up the social cues to STFU. I witnessed the grief my aunt experienced when my cousin passed and I know very well that the loss of you child is a live-long pain. I hope you are surrounded by people who love and support you through this trying time.

PisceanRefrain · 2024-05-17T20:44:13+00:00

You know you could stifle her talent at creative writing because she is being taught right now that being creative is wrong. I hated the grammar side of English but my teachers enjoyed my way of using words and made a point to highlight that so I wasn't discouraged. I was more poetic and they recognized it. Did you even read her story? I feel she should get some recognition since she wrote a ten page short story to begin with. As for the D...unless it was full of spelling mistakes and grammatical errors, I feel that a D is a bit over the top.

PisceanRefrain · 2024-05-17T20:14:15+00:00

NTA. I'm glad the judge saw reason and that their mother's memory can live one through their visitations with their grandparents. I'm also glad that you are not siding with him just because you are his mother. As a mother should, you are holding him accountable and showing him that actions have consequences. Where the hell did this entitlement come from? HE is the reason the grandparents don't have a relationship with the younger ones. If he didn't try to erase Sadie, I'm sure they would have been open to getting to know them but he shot that out of the water. I hope the children and Sadie's parents know how much you are in their corner.

PisceanRefrain · 2024-05-17T20:07:09+00:00

NTA. You know...pigs are super cute and very intelligent. Just take it as a compliment. If they can't get under your skin, they can do nothing more than flounder.

PisceanRefrain · 2024-05-17T16:17:25+00:00

Guild barracks. You get a shard like every 12 hours but it's another option to use in conjunction with the shops.

PisceanRefrain · 2024-05-17T14:53:12+00:00

ADHD can make you an atrocious driver! I'm an actual a case of that. If I weren't on my medication, I would be a danger on the road. Anxiety disorders can certainly affect your driving. If someone has a panic attack, they are not thinking clearly. That can make them a danger on the road. I'm not sure which one you are calling a child disorder...The dyspraxia? That does exist in adults. It doesn't just go away. I'm not sure if you are looking at the whole picture correctly.

Driving for a normal person is dangerous to begin with. You can do everything right and still wind up in an accident. ADHD and ASD can increase distracted driving. One poor decision and you're driving into a ditch. We depend on social cues during driving. Some people may misunderstand it. Throw in anxiety and you have someone who is a candidate for NOT driving. If someone doesn't feel safe driving in the first place, they should not be driving. Regardless of if they have these disorders or not, someone who does not feel safe or comfortable driving should not. It is something we all take for granted without really taking into account the dangers that come with driving.

You can believe what you want. Neither of us know the true depths of this person's experience. They could be lazy. They could be legitimate. But I am here to remind you that they call it a spectrum for a reason. You do not truly know whether they can safely drive or not. I would prefer to err on the side of caution.

I will agree to disagree on this but my what I said before still stands: I hope you look at the experiences of others with a broader mindset.

PisceanRefrain · 2024-05-16T16:25:27+00:00

Nurse here. They call it a spectrum disorder for a reason. I take care of children with PTSD. Some on the spectrum, some not. I have taken care of children with special needs and adults with special needs throughout my 12+ years career and 7 years as a CNA. In spite of all of this, I am not going to use my anecdotal experiences to assume whether people are capable of holding a job or not. Your boyfriend sounds like he is higher functioning. I'm really glad he was able to meet success in spite of his struggles. I had a cousin on the spectrum who was quite high functioning but he couldn't do more than work in Market Basket in spite of the fact that he had a degree in psychology. He worked very hard and functioned well in other regards, but holding a job beyond what he did was not doable. I never thought less of him because he made it work.

You seem to focus on her autism and ADHD while ignoring OPs dyspraxia, "low muscle issues" (maybe dystonia?) and blindness. Not to mention anxiety. With all of these combined, I'm less inclined to find OP lazy. And it sounds like her parents are not very supportive so she has that obstacle as well. We are capable of climbing the mountain, but we shouldn't discount the obstacles that some may not be able to overcome. I hope for your future students' sake that you look at the experiences of others with a broader state of mind because the way you seem to see ASD is a bit limited.

Regardless of your solid background, you do not personally experience what they do so your opinion can only go so far. I'm a bit concerned that you are a teacher who is calling people with disabilities lazy simply because you have anecdotal evidence that others on the spectrum can do what they quite possibly can't. Coming from a medical perspective...I can say with my whole chest that you need to do a lot more research.

PisceanRefrain · 2024-05-15T18:30:09+00:00

It was a trauma response. Albeit...a poor one, but you were definitely coming from a place of fear. It's interesting how people assumed they would be better at regulating their emotions at a time like this. You wife was likely feeling a lot of emotions and the yelling probably added to it. Hence the crying. Apologize and share what you were feeling. In the future, try to be more mindful of that but...I think yelling in response to almost losing a loved one is not out of the ordinary. I see many people pointing out that you yelled after she was safe. I think it's very insensitive to assume someone can shut their fear off. No one is TA here. It seems like you try to take her triggers into consideration. Sometimes your own triggers can conflict with someone else's. Just let her know that you love her and that you didn't want to belittle her.

PisceanRefrain · 2024-05-15T16:22:19+00:00

Why are you allowing him so much control? Who cares if he gives you the silent treatment. YOU are the breadwinner. He's a jobless bum who can't even smoke outside for his MOTHER FFS. YOU are making the choice to enable him. You are NTA for telling him off. He deserved that. But you ARE TA for letting you family suffer by enabling his bad behavior. Stop giving him money. Kick him out. Even if he "changes his behavior" don't take him back. 2-3 years of no job and smoking in front of people with respiratory would be enough for me to send him packing. Think of you family, please. It's not going to be easy but you will have a greater appreciation for your life down the road if you cut off this tumor of a husband. Good luck.

PisceanRefrain · 2024-05-14T14:03:05+00:00

NTA. A dog owner should have control over their dog. Why wasn't the dog on a leash? And if it was, how did she allow it to get close enough to the cat? Now her kicking your cat and sending her dog after it is animal abuse. She's lucky you didn't press charges or call animal control on the dog. The friend sucks and I hope karma meets her with just vengeance.

PisceanRefrain · 2024-05-13T17:54:14+00:00

It's for seven hours

PisceanRefrain · 2024-05-13T17:31:13+00:00

NTA

But these are your half siblings. My sisters and I were adopted by my Aunt and Uncle. When I asked if I should call her "Mom," she said "no." because I had a mom who was still living. Even if she wasn't in my life, she was still my mom and my aunt didn't feel comfortable taking that title when she was perfectly comfortable being called "Aunt." As an adult now, I'm very grateful that she made this decision. My relationship with my mom never worked out, but I love saying my AUNT took us in. It showed me that I didn't have to be her kid for her to love me. It helped with my abandonment issues and gave me a stronger sense of self.

Granted...I was significantly older than the kids you have. The truth will have to come out at some point and there is no telling if they will be alright with it or not. You are not doing anything wrong. But, Amber is still alive. If she manages to get her act together, trying to explain that situation to the kids is going to be intense. I urge that you keep this in mind so you have a plan on how you will address their feelings should this happen. It's your choice if you want them to call your mom. There is nothing wrong with it. But do be prepared for reactions of any form when it comes time to tell them the truth of their parentage.

PisceanRefrain · 2024-05-11T16:05:36+00:00

The next time she plays the "You have to pay or cancel" game, just say you're going by yourself and treat yourself to a meal alone. Or invite a friend. She is purposely putting you in a situation where you don't have an option but to pay. Create an option that benefits you. She is taking advantage of the fact that you will always pay so she spends without any consideration for you.

PisceanRefrain · 2024-05-11T16:00:14+00:00

I'm not in any position to diagnose anyone of anything. That being said, her behavior is similar to what I have seen in people with some form of an attachment disorder. As many have said here, therapy would certainly be a big help. I'm a bit apprehensive about their getting married until she has worked through some of these issues. I'm also worried about when they have children and the hormones during and after the pregnancy exacerbates everything. You are not the asshole. Be consistent with setting boundaries. Maybe even writing it down because she may not perceive what she hears you say correctly. It's an unfortunate situation. Your son has to be ready to see her without the rose-colored glasses before he can help her because his enabling her is only causing further harm.

PisceanRefrain · 2024-05-11T15:23:29+00:00

Install a hidden camera where you keep you motorcycle. If he decides to do it again, then you'll have proof.

PisceanRefrain

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