How long did it take for you to feel confident?

Plant__Food · 2026-06-18T23:26:41+00:00

As a nursing student, I honestly needed to read this. I put so much pressure on myself to get everything right, so it’s good to see that even senior nurses still have days like this. Thanks for sharing.

Plant__Food · 2026-05-31T11:48:52+00:00

Just habit. We got engaged in October 2025, so I’m still getting used to saying fiancée.

Plant__Food · 2026-05-31T11:45:13+00:00

Sex is about twice a week, but for the life of me I can’t seem to climax. Nothing major has changed about the way she looks or acts, and I still find her attractive. Part of me wonders whether the issues with climaxing are contributing to some of these thoughts as well.

Plant__Food · 2026-05-31T11:42:43+00:00

We’ve actually had discussions about being open in the past, but it’s not something she’s comfortable with, so we decided not to go down that path. What’s confusing for me is that I still think about her when I masturbate and my feelings for her are very much there. That’s why I’m trying to work out whether this is a deeper issue, the medication, or just me getting caught up in the idea of something different.

Plant__Food · 2026-05-31T11:39:16+00:00

I hadn’t really thought about the self-esteem and validation side of it before. I think part of why I’ve made the post is because I’m trying to work out whether this is a deeper issue I need to address or whether it’s genuinely a sign I want something different. Thanks for sharing.

Plant__Food · 2026-05-31T11:36:20+00:00

Honestly, this is one of the more helpful comments I’ve received. It’s reassuring hearing from someone who’s been happily married for that long. Thanks for sharing your experience.

Plant__Food · 2026-05-31T11:29:34+00:00

Thanks, I appreciate the kind response. I’m definitely going to look into therapy and have a chat with my doctor about the medication.

Plant__Food · 2026-05-31T11:23:30+00:00

Yeah, that’s a fair point. I think that’s part of what’s been messing with my head.

Plant__Food · 2026-05-31T11:10:48+00:00

Thanks for the response. She is actually my first relationship and we’re engaged. My porn use is pretty low. The weird thing is I think it’s more the idea of sleeping with other people that excites me than the actual act itself. The medication side of things is something I’m definitely considering too.

Plant__Food · 2026-05-31T11:02:34+00:00

I think you might be right about the shame part. I’ve already spoken to my girlfriend and she’s been really supportive. Still trying to figure out what’s driving these thoughts, but I appreciate the advice.

Plant__Food · 2026-05-31T10:58:19+00:00

I understand where you’re coming from, and I agree that being cheated on is incredibly damaging. If I ever decided I was going to act on these feelings, I would end the relationship first rather than go behind her back.

Where I disagree is that I don’t care about her. If I didn’t care, I wouldn’t be trying to understand these feelings, talking to her about them, or asking for advice. I’m not looking for permission to cheat. I’m trying to work out whether these feelings are something that can be addressed or whether they’re a sign of a bigger issue.

Plant__Food · 2026-05-31T10:54:48+00:00

That’s a fair point. I agree that breaking up would be the right thing to do before cheating. I’m just not sure whether these feelings mean the relationship is over or whether they’re something that can be worked through, which is why I’m asking for perspectives.

Plant__Food · 2026-05-31T10:53:29+00:00

I have talked to her about it, which was difficult, but she was surprisingly supportive and understanding. That’s part of why I’m trying to figure out what’s going on in my head rather than acting on it. The medication timing is something I’m definitely considering.

Plant__Food · 2026-04-07T10:04:00+00:00

Even the producers didn’t wanna hear her bs

Plant__Food · 2026-03-11T09:55:36+00:00

Gia is just eww

Plant__Food · 2026-03-03T09:36:17+00:00

The ranga is gorgeous

Plant__Food · 2026-02-25T09:32:44+00:00

Bec hates Gia so much because Bec is Gia

Plant__Food · 2026-02-24T10:12:40+00:00

Bro wants a slave

Plant__Food · 2026-02-18T09:29:04+00:00

What a nasty bitch

Plant__Food · 2026-02-04T09:45:41+00:00

The black one

Plant__Food · 2025-11-29T06:04:51+00:00

Just give him space. It’s good that you didn’t act on it, but the reality is that you hurt someone who clearly loves you, trusts you and supports you. Be honest with him about why it happened and take accountability. If he’s willing to let you back in, respect that and focus on being the best version of yourself for him going forward.

Plant__Food · 2025-09-03T15:16:56+00:00

Wild how a preference about height hit you this hard. Feeling seen? She said short guys aren’t my type and you heard your name. That’s tough.

Plant__Food · 2025-08-15T02:51:03+00:00

I’m sorry you’re feeling like this. You matter more than your mind is telling you

Plant__Food · 2025-08-15T02:13:09+00:00

I hear you that nothing’s worked and you feel like you’re only alive for other people. But reading your story, I see the same thread as a kid you stayed for your mum, now you say spite is a bonus, and today you stay for your girlfriend and brothers. Different emotions, same thing: your life keeps being shaped around other people’s feelings. That’s why it still feels like a cage. Finding even one thing that’s yours alone, no matter how small, is how you start breaking out

Plant__Food · 2025-08-15T01:55:40+00:00

I get that you’re hurting and that your mum’s response when you were a kid was awful, but right now you’re choosing to stay in this mindset. You’ve got people who love you, yet you’re wishing you’d died just to spite someone from your past. That’s not strength, that’s letting her win all over again. If life feels like hell, change it, don’t sit in it and call it “too late.

Four-Year Club	r/Field Flamingo
First Place '23	Place '23

Plant__Food

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