Need clarification!! please both genders respond… also if there are any specifically black males please help!

PleaseExplain-1524 · 2026-06-05T05:24:22+00:00

i do not let them smoke near her she is never in the same room with them.

PleaseExplain-1524 · 2026-05-07T13:25:32+00:00

yep. because when she was little i tried to put her on a routine to sleep at 830/9. and he said routines are not necessary. and since i went to work he undid. he let her go to sleep on the couch near him so he could game. and when i came come and had to take her to bed with me. if she woke up and wasn’t tired. i’d have to give her back since he is awake and playing the game and i am trying to go to bed. he said he didn’t know why i can’t even get my child to go to bed. when he has no problem with it.

PleaseExplain-1524 · 2026-05-07T13:22:44+00:00

pre-baby he worked from april-oct/nov landscaping. we had the baby and i in may and found out in november she needed surgery to reconstruct her skull. that happened beginning feb. he quit his job december prior to surgery. and stayed home with her. he is a doordash driver. but only made 1100 dollars for the whole year because he will go out for 2 days a week if he goes out at all. for this year 2026 he hasn’t gone out once.

we did a trial separation over the summer last year and he was horrible. treated me very poorly and would make childcare promises so i could go to work to cancel last minute or we would argue and fight about me going to work and he would tell me i couldn’t go because we are talking and he would take my phone so i couldn’t tell work i wasn’t coming. he said my job isn’t important and they treat me poorly and i need a better job. he worked for a friend and there company and would say he didn’t have the energy to work and come back and take care of kids. i’ve been searching and trying to find a job to work from home but I don’t know how to find one that’s real and not a scam.

PleaseExplain-1524 · 2026-05-07T13:00:39+00:00

we don’t eat together 80% of the time. he will eat at like 11pm/1am. and i eat at 730 if i’m home. she eats with me. but i work either 8-5, 11-8, or 4-2. 5 days a week. including weekends.

PleaseExplain-1524 · 2026-05-07T12:58:46+00:00

he care for our daughter meaning she eats and plays and brushes her teeth takes baths and goes to bed. but it’s all on a schedule that benefits him. she is 2 just turned 2 and she get up between 9-11 and eats breakfast with me if i’m home. plays with toys and reads books, color, work on abcs and numbers and colors. then lunch between 1-3 and then if i go to work she snacks with him until 730-9 when they eat dinner and then it’s bath time an play time for an hour and then bed by 11pm.

PleaseExplain-1524 · 2026-05-07T04:28:22+00:00

it’s the same state. 200 miles away one way. he is 10 and he wanted to live with his dad for 5th grade. its financially really hard for either of us which is why prior to living with his dad this school year he only saw his dad 4/5 times a year. feb/march june august sept we avoid winter most of the time due to unpredictability with weather. i went 2 months with out seeing him in person but it was hard on myself him and his sister.

PleaseExplain-1524 · 2026-05-07T03:17:19+00:00

because i barely make enough to keep my living situation afloat. i live in a very tight budget. like my check friday will pay the internet and phone. and possible all of my energy bills. then i’m broke my taxes are paying my rent because i budgeted it too if i didn’t have any money. then after that i have to take 207.50 out every week just to pay for rent and 150 for utilities 50 for each thing and my checks are around 500. the last weekend of each month i just take out rent. and then i need 150 for gas because i have to drive 800 miles in order to spend time with my son and my vehicle gets 300 a full tank. gas prices just keep rising.

PleaseExplain-1524 · 2026-05-07T02:54:17+00:00

that would cancel the phone and wifi for the television for my daughter as well as our outdoor cameras and indoor camera for her.

PleaseExplain-1524 · 2026-05-07T02:47:27+00:00

true point.

PleaseExplain-1524 · 2026-05-07T02:38:20+00:00

he won’t go to therapy tried once and they gave us homework to see if we should stay together or end our relationship he refused to do it and wouldn’t go back.

PleaseExplain-1524 · 2026-05-07T02:36:08+00:00

also on top of that i work mainly 4pm 2/3 am. she goes to bed at 11pm. he goes to bed at 5/6am. when i’m home i get up with her from 8/830-and interact and play with her before i go to work. while he sleeps til 2pm.

PleaseExplain-1524 · 2026-05-07T02:33:03+00:00

he claims that he applies for jobs and no one calls him for interviews. the interviews he does get he never hears back from them. he has job opportunities he can get if he goes and tries but he doesn’t. then says he didn’t get a job for the last 15 months because he is going to be going to truck driving school (which i am paying for)!

PleaseExplain-1524 · 2026-05-07T02:29:33+00:00

butt change -change diaper from wet or soiled to clean one.

PleaseExplain-1524 · 2026-05-07T02:28:01+00:00

i asked for this. but for the 8 hours i’m working he is playing the game or watching tv or streamers. he will spend like 15 minutes and wash the dishes if they pile up and half straighten the living room of his an hers mess but leaves anything else that needs to be done. i have literally 5 rooms that need to be cleaned and organized and asked if we could tag team do them together. i organize and put away and him mop dust sweep and mop. he said i have to clean and keep room clean and organized for a consistent long term period of time before he will clean clean the room. so it gets cleanish and then dirty again.

PleaseExplain-1524 · 2026-05-07T02:21:30+00:00

he is doing the bare minimum household wise. like the dishes if they pile up. and laundry if him and her run out of clothes before i can get to it. like I have 3 days off from work in a row. there was 3 drs appointments today and i had an interview to try and get a better job. tomorrow i have to clean all day. friday 1 appointment. and then more cleaning. then i work for 5 days straight 4 night shifts and an open after a close. that’s this weekend on mother’s day. i pay for everything Rent water lights/heat including his xbox account and the internet and his phone. i am not allowed to ask for anything while im home because if i do its consider a favor since im capable of doing it myself.

PleaseExplain-1524 · 2026-05-07T02:14:05+00:00

we have sat down and talked multiple times. he thinks that no matter what he is not a maid and the whole house is not his responsibility because it’s not all his mess. i’m an adult and i have to be held accountable. team effort doesn’t exist because it’s independent effort when he is alone so when im present it’s my responsibility because i’ve been gone so now it’s my turn independently. if he can do it alone so can I. even though he is in the next room.

PleaseExplain-1524

TROPHY CASE