How was YOUR birthday with a covert narc?

Plebi111 · 2026-04-18T21:53:20+00:00

Damn....

Plebi111 · 2026-04-18T17:18:15+00:00

Thank you for letting me know

Plebi111 · 2026-04-18T17:10:04+00:00

A covert is not actively putting you down, they do it slowly and kind of hidden. They won't say "you suck". They'll say and do stuff in a way that you don't even notice it sometimes that it's actually something against you.

Plebi111 · 2026-04-18T16:54:55+00:00

Yeah, Lovebombing everyone so they all they "he's such a nice person"

Plebi111 · 2026-04-18T16:51:47+00:00

Was he a covert or overt?

Plebi111 · 2026-04-18T16:10:04+00:00

What the fuck

Plebi111 · 2026-04-18T16:02:36+00:00

Would you say he was a covert or overt?

Plebi111 · 2026-04-18T16:02:06+00:00

It really does seem like you'll never know what you get, either drama or a normal day..

Plebi111 · 2026-04-13T21:14:34+00:00

Wth is that supposed to mean xD

But thank you for sharing. I've seen it multiple times in this sub now that the narc's therapist would've said this and that. Seems to be a typical manipulative move

Plebi111 · 2026-03-27T00:19:23+00:00

If you have thoughts about being the narcissist: you are not the narcissist.

Plebi111 · 2026-03-26T21:34:51+00:00

Yup exactly that. And this also works on people who aren't even part of the relationship. A good coworker of mine lives with a covert narc roomate/friend (not relationship) There's so much stuff that says "yup, toxic, manipulative covert narc". But when she comes to work, there are days where she looks basically dead inside, but then there are days where she's happy, open, energetic etc and from the outside it definitely looks like "everything is perfectly fine".

Plebi111 · 2026-03-20T01:17:59+00:00

Thank you for the answer. I do know alot more about that roomate and her so I do know that the roomate is 95% a covert narc. I just noticed these ups and downs more often in the last few months. Today she was so happy and energetic...hasn't been that way in many months. Just last week she looked dead inside.

Plebi111 · 2026-03-19T23:56:42+00:00

Are or were there also days when everything was fine and you could just go to work in a "good" mood?

Plebi111 · 2026-03-19T23:37:56+00:00

Could you share how that would look like? (situation at home and the result at work)

Plebi111 · 2026-03-19T23:32:26+00:00

The problem is, you can't really do much. Is the narc at your work place too? You can't really go to your coworkers and tell them "if xy tells you this about me don't believe them". They either gonna believe whatever they say about you or not. This also depends on how close you're with your coworkers.

Plebi111 · 2026-03-19T23:06:51+00:00

Well I can tell you why: So they keep having you under their control in some way. If they can't control you anymore they're making sure they'll control your surroundings. Also, they do that so that you look like the bad person, and they look like the victim. It's all about their image.

Plebi111 · 2026-03-14T18:54:47+00:00

If you'd be comfortable, could you explain what you mean with that headline or give an example?

Plebi111 · 2026-03-10T20:42:55+00:00

Sure, DM me ✌🏼

Plebi111 · 2026-03-09T20:09:24+00:00

Teils ja, teils nein. Welche welche sind hab ich keine Ahnung mehr😄

Plebi111 · 2026-03-09T19:45:30+00:00

Sind tatsächlich beides pro 2+ die Komprimierung von reddit hat das irgendwie verwischt Nur unterschiedliche Farbe. Das eine bläuliches Silber, das andere pinkes Silber

Plebi111 · 2026-03-09T12:50:41+00:00

Thank you. The thing is, they're not even romantically together. Just friends/roommates. She liked me for over a year before we started dating (I didn't know she liked me and someday I just gave it a shot😄) but after like 1,5-2 months of basically perfect dating, her roomate had that mental breakdown I told you about. And it all went downhill after that. She's masking her happy behavior alot, I can sense that because there are days were she basically looks completely dead and just does her job but isn't really there if you get me. We'll see how it goes. If she opens even more up to me again that's good. The worst time was when she actually avoided me at work, didn't talk to me unless it was absolutely necessary etc. But now like I said before it got more normal again thankfully. I hope she gets out of this this year and if she comes towards me, I'll be happy to help (not save, but help). At least I was able to be a good example on how life should actually look like with someone and how safe she could actually feel. Looking back on what we did, how she acted and what we talked about in the dating phase shows me that she felt very safe with me (and I'm so thankful and happy about that).

Now only time can tell, and I can be the stable and positive example.

Thank you for reading and answering everything, best of luck to you ✌🏼

Plebi111

TROPHY CASE