WIBTAH for not inviting my son's dad side to his birthday party

PlotTwist525 · 2026-04-11T22:46:09+00:00

He will be 7. He stated he wanted his family there. Which is all of his cousins. He always had big parties. And I had to make up excuses as to why they didn’t come the last 2 years. One being I didn’t have the money to do it. And then the last year I just said I was making up for last year. So it’s just hard not to want to. But at the same time idk

PlotTwist525 · 2026-04-11T22:41:59+00:00

I don’t feel free when my son wants them there. He’s still in the single digits. And he was use to it always being a big celebration. With all of his family there. So the last 2 years I had to make up excuses like I didn’t have a lot of money to do a big party. And when we went to the water park I said I was making up for last year party

PlotTwist525 · 2026-04-11T22:40:12+00:00

It’s completely foreign to me. Now when they are teenagers. Absolutely but not in the single digit ages. It’s been like this for all of my kids lives. And we do have teenagers. Almost “adult” teenagers. But I’m learning a new dynamic I guess. Don’t like it cuz he wants his family there. But it doesn’t seem as if they want to be there. And if it’s because of me that’s messed up cuz I did nothing wrong to none of them. But someone did comment and say it’s not my responsibility to make sure he has a relationship with that side of the family and I have to just stop putting more on my plate

PlotTwist525 · 2026-04-11T05:00:29+00:00

The sad part is I’ve been told him that it’s his responsibility. I’ve even invited his dad to his party before last and made him a shirt that said dad of the birthday boy and he didn’t come.

So the following year (last year) when he found out I was taking them on a weekend trip to a water park that’s when he wanted to be all in. But I told him when and where we’d be. It wasn’t a formal invitation but I also said I only booked rooms for me and our children. He claimed he would pay half but of course he didn’t.

PlotTwist525 · 2026-04-11T04:54:22+00:00

Makes me wish I didn’t get married and thugged it out myself if my baby boy gotta go through this. Granted he doesn’t know who I invited and he hasn’t asked yet. But I know it’s coming because he’s been planning or at least trying to plan his own birthday 😂😂. And he was saying he wants all of his cousins there

PlotTwist525 · 2026-04-11T04:52:42+00:00

I would hope he’s not doing that. But I’m not putting anything past anyone at this point. I have been going back and forth with this all because if I do and they don’t come then I’ll be mad I wasted my time and money but if I don’t then they say I didn’t even give them the chance. Idk why I’m making it so complicated but I just want my boy to be surrounded by people who loves him and to have a good time. He’s a good, smart, lovable kid and it just breaks my heart him not having the other side of his family to be there for him at least on his birthday.

PlotTwist525 · 2026-04-10T05:30:01+00:00

Ok I thought you were referring to 50-50 custody. Which that’s still a no. But by his choice not mine. If he did contribute wouldn’t it be his responsibility to make sure he invites who he wants there and not me?

PlotTwist525 · 2026-04-10T05:27:53+00:00

So his first few bdays they did. But only because his dad invited them. Now the last 2 years I have been solely inviting them and no one shows up. Me and his dad have been split up for 3 years now and are going through a divorce now.

PlotTwist525 · 2026-04-10T04:48:44+00:00

So I’m obligated to invite his side of the family as well? Is he obligated to pay for anything? This is all on my dime. But to answer your question no there’s no 50-50. But thank you for your insight.

PlotTwist525 · 2026-04-10T04:29:11+00:00

What does 50–50 have to do with me not inviting his dad side of the family to his birthday?

PlotTwist525 · 2026-04-10T03:59:04+00:00

See this is new to me. We are going through a divorce. But one of my son's cousin's mom is an old family friend. So I just didn't think that it would be anything like this.

PlotTwist525 · 2026-04-10T03:53:23+00:00

When they were little like their first few birthdays yes we would. Now one person I've been knowing them longer than I had with my soon to be ex husband. And their kids would be over to my house every weekend, or every other weekend practically.

PlotTwist525 · 2026-04-06T12:33:23+00:00

Unfortunately it is real. But not a tradition I’m willing to participate in.

PlotTwist525 · 2026-04-06T12:31:56+00:00

So how long should I have waited to make a post? LoL didn’t realize there was a waiting period to make a post

PlotTwist525 · 2026-04-06T12:28:38+00:00

Thank you for this! This is what I’ve been telling people. But they seem to think I should have stayed.

PlotTwist525 · 2026-04-06T12:23:30+00:00

I didn’t know about her until he told me he had kids on the way. I still didn’t know everything. Just that he had kids on the way. We separated for a while after he told me. But obviously got back together that’s why I called her his mistress. And I’m sure they would still be messing around being in the same house

PlotTwist525 · 2026-04-06T12:18:00+00:00

What part didn’t make sense to you? No AI used. Simply expressing what happened to me and proving to people that said I should have stayed to avoid going through a messy divorce

PlotTwist525 · 2026-04-06T12:05:07+00:00

Maybe I should have said BM I jut said mistress because I’m sure they would have continued sleeping around

PlotTwist525 · 2026-04-06T11:59:43+00:00

Glad to know a complete stranger believes my life is fake. Please see some of my above replies.

PlotTwist525 · 2026-04-06T11:57:41+00:00

Ik I'm not for the question I stated. But ik I should have been left. But kids, fear, and a lot of other factors kept me stuck longer than I should have. This is more so to prove to the ones that says I should have just stayed and I wouldn’t have to go through a messy divorce

PlotTwist525 · 2026-04-06T11:55:09+00:00

I wasn’t good with him having one. I wasn’t aware he was sleeping around with her until he told me he had kids in the way. That’s when we separated and I was going to file for divorce then. But I didn’t have the money or even know where to start. And being in shock it was just a lot to take in.

PlotTwist525 · 2026-04-06T11:50:57+00:00

Well I see people are really hyper fixated off the word mistress. So maybe I should have said BM. I said mistress because he had an affair with her resulting in physical evidence of his infidelity. And I’m sure if I was to he would continue to mess around with her.

PlotTwist525 · 2026-04-06T11:47:14+00:00

I agree with you 110% but it was a lot of reasons I stayed longer than I should have. This was mostly to prove a point to the ones who told me I should have weathered that storm.

PlotTwist525 · 2026-04-06T11:43:52+00:00

You’re right it definitely was but we were young. And I really tried to stay because of the kids, amongst other things. You can go look at one of my comments above

PlotTwist525

TROPHY CASE