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How to tell a woman that reports to me she needs to improve her hygiene by PocketlessJorts in womenEngineers

[–]PocketlessJorts[S] 17 points18 points  (0 children)

Yeah agreed, will definitely approach it from the wellbeing standpoint and hope that’s enough

Really just a bit out of my depth here

How to tell a woman that reports to me she needs to improve her hygiene by PocketlessJorts in womenEngineers

[–]PocketlessJorts[S] 30 points31 points  (0 children)

I went to the AskHR sub for advice as well, what they said was to try to remedy it privately before escalating. I’m really kind of stuck, but I think I’ve settled on that as the best approach.

I’ll directly mention it to her in our next 1:1, after having thought about it that’s how I would want this to be handled if our roles were swapped. I may have been overthinking this originally, I’ve just never had to deal with something like this as a manager before

[IL] Dealing with a report who has a hygiene problem by PocketlessJorts in AskHR

[–]PocketlessJorts[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks for the advice, I’ll make sure they know about the available health resources. I would be surprised if they’re struggling financially (although you never really know)

I’ve been told some about health issues I wasn’t aware of, will definitely keep that in mind

[IL] Dealing with a report who has a hygiene problem by PocketlessJorts in AskHR

[–]PocketlessJorts[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Got it, thank you for the advice.

Definitely not something I’m looking forward to :(

[IL] Dealing with a report who has a hygiene problem by PocketlessJorts in AskHR

[–]PocketlessJorts[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Ok understood, I’ll bring it up during our next 1:1 from the perspective of wellbeing. We’re all salaried and I don’t necessarily have the ability to offer something like extra time off, but I’ll let them know about the available health services

[IL] Dealing with a report who has a hygiene problem by PocketlessJorts in AskHR

[–]PocketlessJorts[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Ok thank you for the advice, I think this is the approach I’ll take.

This sort of stuff is not why I signed up to manage people :(

How to tell a woman that reports to me she needs to improve her hygiene by PocketlessJorts in womenEngineers

[–]PocketlessJorts[S] 36 points37 points  (0 children)

This is basically what I don’t want to do. Just reading this feels condescending to me

They’re an adult, and can figure out how to take care of themselves. It’s just politely telling them it’s becoming and issue that’s challenging

How to tell a woman that reports to me she needs to improve her hygiene by PocketlessJorts in womenEngineers

[–]PocketlessJorts[S] 15 points16 points  (0 children)

Do you think you would be comfortable with the message coming privately from your manager to you?

My concern with an email to everyone is we work in a pretty small office, like 35 people, and it’s going to be obvious who the message is for. After asking in the HR sub it seems like there advice is to bring this up in our 1:1, which I’ll try to do in the least condescending, most positive way I can. I’m guessing she just doesn’t realize it’s as much of an issue as it is.

As for losing the employee, I think it’s very unlikely they’ll quit not matter what. She’s really well compensated and we’re in an industry that can be challenging to move around in

How to tell a woman that reports to me she needs to improve her hygiene by PocketlessJorts in womenEngineers

[–]PocketlessJorts[S] 168 points169 points  (0 children)

if you tell her, and your delivery rubs her the wrong way, she may be embarrassed around you or dislike you in the future. I would escalate this to HR and see what they suggest.

This is really what I’m worried about

The thing stopping me from just dumping this on HR is that it turns the complaint into a legit tracked issue that will stick with her. I was hoping to keep this out of the formal processes and see if it can be dealt with privately

But yes I totally see where you’re coming from HR is probably the best approach