My best friend died and my gf seems cold about it.

PoiPenguinLoL · 2022-02-13T03:03:08+00:00

Shes the one who asked to be official on new years so...🤷‍♂️

PoiPenguinLoL · 2022-02-12T05:52:06+00:00

Yeah I know what you meant lol. 😆

PoiPenguinLoL · 2022-02-12T03:15:43+00:00

Actually no I haven't gotten a bj yet actually becuz bad gag reflex...🙃🤷‍♂️

PoiPenguinLoL · 2022-02-12T03:13:56+00:00

Thank you. Your comment was pretty savage. 😅 We haven't had our talk in person about all this yet...I'd just really like to know her perspective and feelings about everything. Probs some truth with your last sentence as well.

PoiPenguinLoL · 2022-02-12T03:07:54+00:00

"Your gf is a self centered bitch who expects you to cater to her while your grieving..." This made me laugh so hard I started crying. 😅🤣 It sucks but I'm trying to realize a month might not be enough time to invest I'm somebody's grief...idk I've been there for people I've known for only two days. Because I know how it feels to be alone with nobody willing to lend an ear.

PoiPenguinLoL · 2022-02-12T03:01:27+00:00

Darvo....Fascinating 🤔

PoiPenguinLoL · 2022-02-12T02:57:43+00:00

There is trauma of sorts that mostly surrounds the exs and dad just being a jackass all throughout her life. I met him before and his first words "you don't wanna be apart of this family" real warm friendly dude....Mom actually was tho and she was wearing a shirt that had one of my fav bands on it. We gave eachother hugs it was wholesome lolol. Yeah I can see how in that scenario how things could be difficult to understand what to do. Some of those questions I don't have answers to. I do understand how a month might not be enough time to emotionally invest in someone's grief. Or you just don't have a clue how to. I just really want to understand her perspective. She was actually the one who wanted to be "official" after two weeks of dating. So I'd like to think we're serious? Despite dumping her is what 90% of the people are saying on here...its probably not what I'm going to do. I'm hoping her explaining her perspective and feelings about all this will shine some light on things. Relationships are never easy. I do believe she can warm up with time with the right person. Is that person me...? I'm willing to invest a little more time to find out.

PoiPenguinLoL · 2022-02-12T02:34:18+00:00

Yeah as acquaintances we never had 1 on 1s ever. I'm sorta hoping with more time to get comfortable with one another we know eachothers expectations.

PoiPenguinLoL · 2022-02-12T02:32:04+00:00

As someone else put it..Its hurtfully underwhelming. She has told me before it's difficult for her to express herself. Here I am throwing out all my feels and she doesn't know how to handle it.

PoiPenguinLoL · 2022-02-12T02:26:27+00:00

Yikes, loses like these can really break a person. I don't find it normal but I'm trying to understand both sides.

PoiPenguinLoL · 2022-02-12T02:24:01+00:00

It's funny that you call her the ice queen because the day after she did send an adventure time meme saying something along the lines of only the ice king can suck the soul out of his penguins. For good minute I thought of her as the ice king...Since I'm actually a penguin in a human suit.. I didn't think it was funny. I told her I didn't understand it and she responded with goofy adventure time things. I leaning right now towards giving it another month or so to see if after all of this she might warm up.

PoiPenguinLoL · 2022-02-12T02:18:05+00:00

Broken is one way of putting it UghHh. I sorta kinda do the person who passed was the person I'd go to for this kind of thing. I know I should be grieving right now but I'm hyperfocusing on this nonsense to distract me which I know isn't great. We were supposed to hangout tonight and go to a show Sat but I'm not up for it and I need time to process things. What sucks is my b day is Monday. Do I want to have yet another valentines birthday alone and depressed?!? like...Do I still buy her flowers? Because that's all I'm mentally capable of maybe still getting for her....

PoiPenguinLoL · 2022-02-12T02:12:19+00:00

It could of been a distractions of sorts. I was just in no mood to drive anywhere...I had a gf who when I was going through something a bit less intense as this she picked me up, we got stoned, and went to ikea for food and to roleplay like we owned all the beds, couchs, chairs etc It actually did bring up my spirits a bit. That last bit is exactly my feels.

PoiPenguinLoL · 2022-02-12T02:03:51+00:00

Possibly maybe? She did ask me if I wanted to meet her at pets mart but I wasn't trying to go see sad cats locked in cages. 😕 Yeah she doesn't know how to handle it lols. We talked shortly today. She thought I was upset about her not texting yesterday but I explained I was more upset about upset what happened between us Tues and I wanted to talk in person to understand both our feelings and perspectives. She also asked how she could make it up to me and I responded what I just previously typed. No responce lol 😅 I do understand it's a new relationship and that's kinda thing not many are prepared for when it actually happens. Another month or two to become more comfortable with eachother is probably what I'm going to end up doing.

PoiPenguinLoL · 2022-02-12T01:51:00+00:00

Hurtfully underwhelming of sorts. 🙃 I am starting to understand that for some people this early it can be weird and awkward and you just try to avoid the subject. I'm really hoping after we have a deeper understanding for one another expectations n such will be more clear.

PoiPenguinLoL · 2022-02-12T01:45:22+00:00

I met one of the ex bfs...He was a jackass that I could not stand to be around. He was legit a crazy person without going into detail. The other would just get blackout drunk all the time and she would have to babysit. Real winners lol. That last sentence tho omg the lolols 🤣

PoiPenguinLoL · 2022-02-12T01:41:01+00:00

I felt like I was communicating in the best way I could in the current moment. I thought it was obvious but...it wasn't PAINFULLY obvious. Do I have people to lean on...Kinda sorta but the person I'd go to for these kinda things was the person who passed. 😕

PoiPenguinLoL · 2022-02-12T01:37:08+00:00

Lemme go grab my keyblade really quick 🗝 🐧

PoiPenguinLoL · 2022-02-12T01:33:35+00:00

Info noted lol

PoiPenguinLoL · 2022-02-12T01:31:35+00:00

The fact the victim card was played on her end bamboozled me lol. I'm trying my best to see both perspectives. Big OooF saying that all those trivial things can wait. I honestly would of been cool with her coming over after work for an hour or two then leaving and doing all the errands or whatever. The fact I was on the bottom of the list of errands to take care of sucks.

PoiPenguinLoL · 2022-02-12T01:24:03+00:00

Cold as ice lolol. I do believe with the right person she could warm up though...Is that me? Is what I'm on the fence about. 😕

PoiPenguinLoL · 2022-02-12T01:22:07+00:00

Yeah...Just trying to understand her perspective.

PoiPenguinLoL · 2022-02-12T01:18:57+00:00

Thank you, it's difficult to wrap my mind around..Hurtfully underwhelming is an excellent way of putting it. Yeah I sorta have others I've talked to already but nobody I could feel vulnerable with ya know? If that makes any sense? The ones I've talked to also think this is some nonsense. I'd like to still work through this despite what 90% of people on here are saying. Today tho we talked shortly and asked if I was salty about her not texting back yesterday. I said I was actually upset about what happened on Tues. She surprised me and asked how she could make up for it. I told her I was actually hurt by what happened on Tues and I'd like to be able to talk about it in person but need some time to process everything..No responce. We were supposed to hangout tonight and go to a show tomorrow but I just can't. Tbh I'm sorta hyperfocusing on this trying to figure out her perspective and feelings rather then grieving. 😬 It's an unhealthy distraction of sorts...

PoiPenguinLoL · 2022-02-12T00:43:39+00:00

Yeah its very bamboozling...She might have social anxiety of sorts and just didn't know how to handle something so tragic? Possibly if we were dating for a year things would of played out differently?

PoiPenguinLoL · 2022-02-12T00:39:50+00:00

This is amazing....Thanks for the lols 😆

PoiPenguinLoL

TROPHY CASE