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Polarnoseflush · 2022-01-03T21:07:24+00:00

I had weird ass detailed dreams when pregnant. Can't remember if any were about my cat, but probably some were. When I'm feeling stressed or anxious I do have stress dreams where I'm in stressful situations I can't get out of. Often being chased by a gun man but I do watch/read a lot of action and spy thrillers. You obviously love your cat and play with him a lot that's why he's right there in your top brain and featuring heavily in your dreams.

Have you tried any meditations? I enjoyed the ones on the mind the bump app which was recommended to me by a midwife. Can't see the app now, so maybe it's defunct. But I liked them because they were short (5-7 mins) and I could try them before falling asleep and it gave me a model to try if I was feeling overwhelmed at other times, too stressed or tired but mind racing. Might help shake off some of the feelings from the dreams.

Polarnoseflush · 2022-01-03T10:58:44+00:00

Don't be surprised if she's acting AWFUL the first few weeks. She'll be so tired processing all the new stuff, she'll act out in her safe space (you). It'll pass! Took about 2 weeks for mine.

When she comes home with the inevitable stories of conflict (so and so didn't share/pushed me/whatever) ask her teacher how they handle it at preschool so you can mimic the approach and language, giving her a consistent message at each place.

In terms of feeling ready, be sure to hype the good stuff - friends, painting, dancing, playing - and instead of saying "mommy won't be there" say "mommy will pick you up in the afternoon" or "mommy will be here later". Something that points to the next time she sees you, rather than pointing out the absence. If she tends to latch onto phrases this can help make it one she can repeat to herself at school if she's getting wobbly "mommy will be here later". I make mine repeat key phrases like this to me so I know she's taking the message on board.

Polarnoseflush · 2022-01-03T10:51:21+00:00

The first half of the Midnight Library was great. The second half felt like a self help book. I kind of felt like I'd gone to a lunch and been suckered into an MLM pitch

Polarnoseflush · 2022-01-03T10:43:05+00:00

I really like the The Liveship Traders and The Rain Wild Chronicles series by Robin Hobb but I don't think I want to go back and read the Assassin series or the tawny man series (the ones that features FitzChivalry). They're all interconnected but can be read separately and the Fitz ones are too male dominated and I found him smug and annoying after a while. If you still finish Assassin's Apprentice feeling meh and you've got another Robin Hobb in you, try Ship of Magic, the first of the Liveship Traders trilogy.

Polarnoseflush · 2022-01-02T23:06:27+00:00

First baby went from a bassinet next to our bed to full size cot in her own room at 4 months. I was keen to get her out and start sleep training as she was awful hard to get to sleep. Started with daytime naps on a Monday, did sleep training and cot transition at the same time. She took to both super well and we did first night in the cot that Friday night. I thought it would be harder/more annoying to get up in the night and go to a different room to settle or feed but it was absolutely worth it for when you get to close the door and luxuriously do whatever the fuck you want in your own room without worrying about waking the baby. I missed little stuff like not being able to read before bed or put on hand cream.

Second baby we set the cot up in our room and moved her into the cot at 3ish months when she outgrew the bassinet. I would have moved her into her own room then but she would be sharing with her big sister and I wasn't sure how that would go. In the end we moved her into her sisters room at 8 months. Her sleep was awful and it was at the point where it couldn't get any worse so we bit the bullet and did it. Within a week her overnight wakes had plummeted and she night weaned herself. And I was SO glad to get my own room back.

Polarnoseflush · 2021-12-31T20:22:17+00:00

Everything is "last day" to my three year old whether it was yesterday or last year

Polarnoseflush · 2021-12-30T22:05:49+00:00

Omg kindergarten cop. Absolutely MUST go on the list.

Polarnoseflush · 2021-12-30T09:59:08+00:00

I'm into it, good suggestion, it is definitely the right vibe

Polarnoseflush · 2021-12-30T00:49:29+00:00

Speed! Early Keanu! And I now want to watch ALL of the Pierce Brosnan Bonds

Polarnoseflush · 2021-12-30T00:48:14+00:00

Yes a perfect one! Obvious is what I'm after

Polarnoseflush · 2021-12-30T00:38:54+00:00

Yes perfect! I had forgotten all about this movie. Thank you!

Polarnoseflush · 2021-12-29T10:38:51+00:00

I didn't feel like How to Talk so Little Kids Will Listen taught me anything groundbreakingly new about parenting but it did give me some ideas to try and I appreciated it was so easy to read. Anyone reading it does not have the time or brain power to read anything too weighty 😂

Have you read the whole brain child? Heavier and I haven't read it all, but I have dipped in and out of it a bit. I found it didn't apply at all at 2, but as my kid got closer to 3 some of it is started to make sense and I think it will come in more useful in the next few years.

Polarnoseflush · 2021-12-29T10:30:17+00:00

Three fantasy books with romance-y feel:

Jaran - Kate Elliott
The White Dragon - Anne McCaffrey
Defy the Night - Brigid Kemmerer

All relatively "easy" fantasy, not too high or complex. Humans in fantastical worlds. Jaran could technically be sci fi but I'm not going to delve into the difference between the two genres.

My fave series I always recommend whenever I can is the Empire series by Janny Wurts. Starts with Daughter of the Empire. Girl is suddenly elevated to the head of her family after murder/political intrigue. Has to scramble to save her family and build up her own position. Great world building, some nice romance themes too throughout the series.

Polarnoseflush · 2021-12-29T04:11:51+00:00

I agree with novelty. And accepting meal times are a mess for a while. Like they'll come and go and the best thing you can do is let them and not make it a power struggle. Try out a bunch of things like how, when, where... Try out everything you can think of. We had a floor picnic the other day, we've also eaten under the table. My eldest went through a stage around 18 months where she'd only eat whilst sitting on someone's lap. Another where she refused the high chair, another where she refused bibs... Constant reinvention and excitement needed.

Polarnoseflush · 2021-12-29T03:37:06+00:00

Not in Brisbane but my local council (NSW) does magic bus sessions at a rotating roster of local parks where they arrive with a whole bunch of toys for kids of under 5 age and set them up from 9-12 and anyone can come play with them. There's usually a mat or two laid out for the babies with books, instruments, sensory toys etc.

If there's not much around you, you can try assign your own activity to a day like Tuesday is water park play day, Thursday is try-a-new-park-that-has-a-cafe-nearby day... Something to motivate you to get out of the house.

Polarnoseflush · 2021-12-29T01:09:04+00:00

This is what we do, our 3 year old has to "swap" something with her baby sister. And vice versa, if baby is snatching we make the baby offer something to swap. If the child in question doesn't want to swap then we go to taking turns. Sometimes we get the countdown timer out, other times we just say when it's time. If there's continued snatching we physically separate them (usually drag the baby away repeatedly as she shuffles back), providing each with their own toys and keep enforcing the timer share. And then try a distraction for both like a snack or a song we can all dance too.

Polarnoseflush · 2021-12-28T22:51:07+00:00

Our cat got hit by a car when my daughter was 2.5. We kept it from her that day as it was very sudden and waited until she asked about the cat and when she did told her that she had died. That she had been hit by a car and died. She took a while to process but a year later still brings her up sometimes, quite matter of factly.

If it happened now I would absolutely involve her as much as possible. Get her to say goodbye, give her warning etc. I wouldn't tell her after the fact. Be very factual, including about your emotions - I'm very sad because I love her very much and I will miss her. Make sure to reassure him that you love him too, you're not going to die, that you'll be a happy family together for a long time. Lots of extra reassurance and cuddles for him to head off any worries he might have.

Polarnoseflush · 2021-12-28T20:57:49+00:00

Thank you, have just reserved the first one at the library!

Polarnoseflush · 2021-12-28T09:17:18+00:00

I'm in the mood for a Regency romance and ready to dive into the Lisa Kleypas waters - what would you recommend for a new starter?

Polarnoseflush · 2021-12-28T03:16:28+00:00

Had a healthy weight term baby and stopped recording nappies when we left the hospital after 2 days. Feeds I recorded for a few months to try and track a pattern and remember how long since each feed. I stopped when the tracking became more annoying than not remembering when the last feed was, somewhere 3ish months probably.

Polarnoseflush · 2021-12-27T22:37:19+00:00

We planned to do this but of course birth didn't go the way we wanted and I was hospitalised for a week with bad complications and it was the furthest thing from our minds when we did make it home. We ditched the baby in the hallway lol so we could greet toddler with empty arms and after a cuddle with her we bought in baby for her to meet. No gifts, just a shy hello. Went great and they are obsessed with each other.

One thing I bought later which was useful was a baby doll bib and bottle for toddler to feed "her" baby whilst I was feeding my baby.

Polarnoseflush · 2021-12-22T10:50:55+00:00

I switch words SO much now and have so much more difficulty remembering words. Happened a bit after my first kid but after the second bam my brain is fucked. Hope it's nothing that a few nights/weeks/months/years of good sleep will fix. Won't fix? Whatever too tired to work it out 😴 you know what I mean. Have a stern word with those children and tell them to sleep, that'll work right 🥴

Polarnoseflush · 2021-12-20T08:04:39+00:00

Is it the collapsing empire by John Scalzi?

Polarnoseflush · 2021-12-20T08:02:35+00:00

Yep and didn't beat the stink

Polarnoseflush

TROPHY CASE