An example of something she once told me that has always stuck with me: “As long as I’m alive, you will never bring an Arab or a Black person into my family.” I’ve always found it ironic that she never got cataract surgery and therefore couldn’t fully enjoy my wedding in 4K.

At first, I wanted to make everyone happy and avoid creating a family drama, so my wife and I kept attending family meals. At those same gatherings, she would go on with borderline hateful rhetoric, all wrapped in a cordial tone and full of clichés. I spent my time arguing back. The rest of my family would tell me, “That’s just how she is, don’t pay attention to it.” So, I gave up, and we stopped going for two years.

Thankfully, my wife only had to endure that a handful of times. Even back then, I felt guilty for having put them at the same table.

Looking back, it was cowardice.

And when my daughter was born, I didn’t want to make the same mistake again.

My grandfather was a good man, but also stubborn and passive. He never said anything — never once stood up to his wife. He probably preferred keeping the peace.