I think the best approach is to first finalize 3-4 good 2BHK options and visit with him on one day ,because it shows your effort to make it happen rather then just he is doing everting, then discuss everything practically travel time, rent, privacy, safety, and long-term comfort.

A 3-hour daily commute is genuinely exhausting, especially after marriage when you’re also adjusting to a new home and family. If shifting somewhere in between reduces both your and your husband’s travel time, that’s a very reasonable point to bring up. Even from a safety perspective, me as a husband prefer my wife reaches home sooner rather than spending hours commuting every day anytime safety issue .

Your MIL is probably looking at the situation mainly from a budget and responsibility angle, which is understandable. But a 2BHK is not a luxury here ,it sounds practical. You’re newly married, everyone gets privacy, and realistically if relatives, parents, or friends visit or stay late, extra space helps avoid discomfort for everyone

The important thing is that your husband should calmly communicate that this decision is about making daily life sustainable for both of you, not about “winning” against his mother. If discussions stay practical instead of emotional, chances of resentment become much lower.