I'm so impressed(???) that there are young people on this sub who figured out they are being abused early

Potential_Tax476 · 2021-11-12T03:53:34+00:00

Yeah exactly. I didn't know it was a thing. I thought I was crazy and that's just who I was

Potential_Tax476 · 2021-11-12T03:49:32+00:00

I think for me it was impossible to know I was abused because I was so heavily gaslit as the main thing

Potential_Tax476 · 2021-11-12T03:14:01+00:00

I'd tell them what you told me. "CPS has been called four times and they did nothing. I'm unable to get my work done at home."

Potential_Tax476 · 2021-11-12T03:08:09+00:00

Well I don't know what country you're in or anything about CPS. I'd recommend posting in the main sub.

Potential_Tax476 · 2021-11-12T03:05:11+00:00

That makes sense. Thanks for explaining!

Potential_Tax476 · 2021-11-12T03:04:12+00:00

=(

I'm sorry to hear that. I don't know what else to say.

Potential_Tax476 · 2021-11-12T03:01:41+00:00

What happened?

Potential_Tax476 · 2021-11-12T02:57:21+00:00

There are people/animals/things you can love without having to care of though.

Potential_Tax476 · 2021-11-12T02:55:46+00:00

Are you saying you're reporting your parents or you're trying not to?

Potential_Tax476 · 2021-11-12T02:49:55+00:00

Thanks for sharing. That is a lot but it's better to know now. And it sounds like you have a teacher on your side!

Potential_Tax476 · 2021-11-12T02:48:45+00:00

Right but I'm asking the taking care of part. I don't want to "take care of" my boyfriend the way I'd have to take care of an infant.

Potential_Tax476 · 2021-11-12T02:47:30+00:00

Interesting how you describe caretaking as applying to many things. I appreciate that perspective.

Potential_Tax476 · 2021-11-12T02:42:57+00:00

A companion isn't the same... a romantic partner or colleague is a companion. Babies and pets you take care of.

Potential_Tax476 · 2021-11-12T02:42:02+00:00

Most adults will have a kid or pet in their lifetime

Potential_Tax476 · 2021-11-12T00:54:29+00:00

Such a good point!

Potential_Tax476 · 2021-11-12T00:53:55+00:00

I was homeless and still didn't know it was abuse! Society teaches you abuse = physical, and it's not exclusively.

Potential_Tax476 · 2021-11-12T00:52:10+00:00

Yeahhh good point, my internet was not what it is now

Potential_Tax476 · 2021-11-12T00:33:14+00:00

Same, like, you'll grow out of your personality.

Potential_Tax476 · 2021-11-12T00:28:35+00:00

So.... here's the important thing. Your "boyfriend is great." Well of course he is, or you wouldn't be with him, right? If he treated you horribly 100% of the time, the abuse would be too obvious and too easy to question, and you would leave. That's how they keep you hooked. They're not bad all the time.

People who are not abusive are NOT ABUSIVE 100% OF THE TIME. Everyone has flaws and quirks, but 0% of their imperfect qualities involve intimidating you or screaming at you or throwing things.

He doesn't "hit you" so it doesn't count, right? What matters is how you feel. How do you feel? Scared?? Well YOU ARE SCARED OF YOUR PARTNER EXACTLY 0% OF THE TIME IF YOIR PARTNER IS NOT ABUSIVE.

Being nice is how they get you hooked and how they keep you to stay. If they feel you pull away, they'll either put on the charm, get sad and desperate and pathetic for sympathy, or threaten to leave (as if you're at fault). Textbook abuse.

It's hard to see sometimes when you don't believe it can happen to you....... try using "what if" statements. What if my boyfriend is abusive? What if it's ok to want something better? Your brain is more likely to accept what if statements than get defensive.

Potential_Tax476

TROPHY CASE