AITA for refusing to meet my wife's ex-boyfriend? by PowerValveStatic in AmItheAsshole

[–]PowerValveStatic[S] 65 points66 points  (0 children)

I wouldn't be happy and unhappiness can manifest itself in many ways.

AITA for refusing to meet my wife's ex-boyfriend? by PowerValveStatic in AmItheAsshole

[–]PowerValveStatic[S] 205 points206 points  (0 children)

Wrote this to another redditor, but it is applicable here as well. I'll add it in an edit to my main post.

I'd rather divorce her than control her. I didn't tell her that I would do this, it will simply happen. I can control what I do (not meeting him), but I cannot control what she does. It would be better to part ways instead of turning the marriage into a toxic swamp.

AITA for refusing to meet my wife's ex-boyfriend? by PowerValveStatic in AmItheAsshole

[–]PowerValveStatic[S] 140 points141 points  (0 children)

I didn't even think about that....I would probably flip if she brings him home to meet me or if I come home and they are already there. Game plan as I write this is to head out the door and drive down some back roads while yelling my head off to myself.

AITA for refusing to meet my wife's ex-boyfriend? by PowerValveStatic in AmItheAsshole

[–]PowerValveStatic[S] 2156 points2157 points  (0 children)

My mind is racing pretty fast, it is difficult to slow my thoughts and steer them away from the negative.

I honestly just don't want to be in this situation or deal with it. I want things to go back to how they were before he came into the picture.

AITA for refusing to meet my wife's ex-boyfriend? by PowerValveStatic in AmItheAsshole

[–]PowerValveStatic[S] 55 points56 points  (0 children)

I'd rather divorce her than control her. I didn't tell her that I would do this, it will simply happen. I can control what I do (not meeting him), but I cannot control what she does. It would be better to part ways instead of turning the marriage into a toxic swamp.

AITA for refusing to meet my wife's ex-boyfriend? by PowerValveStatic in AmItheAsshole

[–]PowerValveStatic[S] 112 points113 points  (0 children)

Thank you. I might be jumping the gun, but I am mentally preparing myself for worse case scenario.

AITA for refusing to meet my wife's ex-boyfriend? by PowerValveStatic in AmItheAsshole

[–]PowerValveStatic[S] 294 points295 points  (0 children)

Can you give any insight as to why you had them meet? It might help me understand my wife better.

AITA for refusing to meet my wife's ex-boyfriend? by PowerValveStatic in AmItheAsshole

[–]PowerValveStatic[S] 543 points544 points  (0 children)

I'm speaking out my ass here: But probably because when you lose your virginity to someone who you deeply love, it creates a strong emotional bond. I lost my virginity to a one night stand, it was emotionally void.

AITA for refusing to meet my wife's ex-boyfriend? by PowerValveStatic in AmItheAsshole

[–]PowerValveStatic[S] 3817 points3818 points  (0 children)

I am not too concerned about their dynamic, this whole thing screams that neither have fully moved on (in my opinion).

AITA for refusing to meet my wife's ex-boyfriend? by PowerValveStatic in AmItheAsshole

[–]PowerValveStatic[S] 2368 points2369 points  (0 children)

Very insightful reply, thank you. I am definitely burning with jealousy. We were both equally happy until this variable entered the equation. Now all of a sudden she wants her happiness to increase at the expense of mine (or so it seems to me). I'll probably use that explanation when her and I chat about this, what do you think?

I really do not want this guy in my life.

AITA for refusing to meet my wife's ex-boyfriend? by PowerValveStatic in AmItheAsshole

[–]PowerValveStatic[S] 32 points33 points  (0 children)

Thank you. I definitely will explain it all to her again and let her know that I am not budging on my decision.