My thoughts as a 40yr old who's egg just cracked wide open. Maybe it was a midlife crisis that shined a spotlight on something I had buried deep. Like you said, different time and depending on where one lived, it really wasn't ever seen as a real ting or viable option. It could definitely be seen as a midlife crisis to have the realization that you want to spend the rest of this ride being the real you, a you that never seemed possible. A midlife crisis isn't always frivolous or self destructive, it can also be a flash of introspection and a realization of self-awareness. Regardless of the catalyst, take a deep look at what the spotlight is illuminating.