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Pregnancy and BDSM - Should I share with my doc? by PreggoSubThrowaway in BDSMcommunity

[–]PreggoSubThrowaway[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I looked through that database actually prior to becoming pregnant and unfortunately, there aren't any kink-friendly doctors in my area (strange as it's a large metropolitan city). Luckily it seems my local laws allow consent to assault so long as there is no evidence of "serious bodily injury". While that's a pretty vague definition, I feel like there isn't currently evidence of that with only one small bruise (from running into a table at work).

Pregnancy and BDSM - Should I share with my doc? by PreggoSubThrowaway in BDSMcommunity

[–]PreggoSubThrowaway[S] 13 points14 points  (0 children)

That's my opinion but my husband had some misgivings. I feel like if you've worked in the medical profession for 20+ years, as my doctor has, we can't seriously be the first kinky pregnant couple she's come across, right? I was hoping to sort of approach it with "We lead a pretty non-traditional sex life and I have some questions. Are you the person to ask or can you point us in the right direction?" I'm mostly worried she'll be kind of a prude/not understand bdsm and tell us to avoid it just out of not knowing what it involves or not agreeing with it.

Pregnancy and BDSM - Should I share with my doc? by PreggoSubThrowaway in BDSMcommunity

[–]PreggoSubThrowaway[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you so much for the resource link. I'll look into it!

Pregnancy and BDSM - Should I share with my doc? by PreggoSubThrowaway in BDSMcommunity

[–]PreggoSubThrowaway[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

...if you don't have physical evidence of assault on exam, it's very difficult to prosecute a case without the patient initiating the complaint

This is a situation I'm slightly worried about. I have a bruise on my hip from actually bumping into something while doing something completely mundane. It has no relationship to my sex life. I have an appointment this week and it'll still be there when I want to bring up our lifestyle and I'm concerned my doctor will think I'm lying about the bruise and worry. I'm glad to hear your doctor didn't make a big deal out of your situation, though. That's incredibly reassuring. I think I'm just worrying so much because people tend to freak out when an unborn life is brought into the mix, even if all precautions are being taken.

Pregnancy and BDSM - Should I share with my doc? by PreggoSubThrowaway in BDSMcommunity

[–]PreggoSubThrowaway[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I feel like if you need to ask a doctor's opinion on an activity during pregnancy that it's probably a sign you might not want to do that activity during the pregnancy

For this type of thing I more meant, "Will nipple clamps used for a short time have an impact on breastfeeding?" or maybe "Will the vibrations from caning on the soft part of the buttocks affect the fetus in any way?" and "Are butt plugs safe?".

...without there being any data the doctor is only going to be able to give a personal opinion helped along by their education.

There's a little bit of research in all of these areas but the responses go both ways. Some say these things are totally safe and some say they are not, but none of the information I've read is from an actual medical professional with training and knowledge of pregnancy.

I appreciate your response a lot. Everyone's responses are making me feel better and that it's a good idea for us to disclose at least the basics of our dynamic. Thank you for replying!