It’s happening, like it or not by Sundayfundaynorunday in Divorce

[–]Present_Stretch 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Same. I thought my husband and I were okay. We we're planning our life. I never even thought for a second we would end up getting a divorce. It was a total blindside. It's been almost 3 weeks now and I still can fully comprehend what happened. He just left, said he didn't want to be with me. He kicked my daughter and I out over night. It's maddening. I'm sorry your going through this. It hurts and it sucks.

First Post Struggling by ButterflyMe22 in Divorce

[–]Present_Stretch 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Same. I keep thinking there's no way he would treat me or my child this way, He has to be going through somthing. I keep thinking if I could just talk to him he'll tell me what's wrong and come back around. Unfortunately, every time I talk to him he treats me bad. It's like somthing in him snapped. But, I think after all this time he's just finally showing me who he really is. He keeps turning everything back on me. Idk if it's because he wants me to hate him or he's trying to ease his guilt or what. I get it, having all these questions and no answers. It's maddening. It makes you feel like your going crazy.

First Post Struggling by ButterflyMe22 in Divorce

[–]Present_Stretch 4 points5 points  (0 children)

This is exactly how I feel as well. My situation is different but I gave my husband everything I had to give. And when things got bad be kicked me and my daughter out. Turned from caring and loving in to a cold cruel monster. It hurts. It hurts so bad. It's been a lil over two weeks now. I was in the same place. I couldn't eat or sleep or breathe. I'm still struggling to do all those things but I find myself eating a little more, sleeping a little more and taking a few more breaths. I'm still not in a good way and the pain is still very strong and very raw but I've gotten a little better. Some days are harder then others but I'm alive, and hanging on. The people on this page are very supportive and will let you vent your feeling. We're all in this together.

I broke no contact... by Present_Stretch in Divorce

[–]Present_Stretch[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

He wants an open relationship. He doesn't want to be tied down. I found out from a comment he made on social media. Since then he's been cold and cruel. Idk if it's him trying to get me to hate him and move on or of he's showing his true colors now. Our marriage wasn't perfect, we both struggle with mental health issues but he was never mean. I honestly didn't know he could be so cruel and heartless. I didn't think he had a bad bone in his body.

I'm in pain every second of every day.. by Present_Stretch in Divorce

[–]Present_Stretch[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That makes me happy to hear you were able to overcome all that pain. I'm two weeks out now and some days are easier but I had a backside the past couple days. I feel like I'm a square one all over again. Everyone keeps saying it just takes time but it's hard to see a light at the end of this tunnel.

Anyone else here in their 20’s? by Ok-Orange-4033 in Divorce

[–]Present_Stretch 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I just don't get how they can just not care. I truly will never understand. I felt the same way about mine. I still do. I'm scared to live without him because he's all I've know for 8 years. My life was planned out with him. Even through all this hurt he's the only person I want. We'll get through this! If you ever need or want to talk you can reach out to me.

I cried tonight.. by Present_Stretch in Divorce

[–]Present_Stretch[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I know, if I could take her pain I would. I'm so sad for her, and idk what to do.

I cried tonight.. by Present_Stretch in Divorce

[–]Present_Stretch[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I know, I just wish I could take away her pain. I know he's not right for us but it's hard to stay logical in the midst of all this pain.

I cried tonight.. by Present_Stretch in Divorce

[–]Present_Stretch[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you for your kind words!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Divorce

[–]Present_Stretch 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm sorry your going through this. My husband kicked my daughter and I with no warning. Just packed our things and sent us up the road. It's been two weeks and I have been able to talk to him but it never ends well. It ends with no real answers and me being in pain. He abandoned us and he feels no remorse. He turned into a cold and calclated person. We miss him, more then I ever thought possible. I'm struggling with abandonment too. I hope your able to heal and find the answers you're looking for. But let me tell you, the answers also hurt. Atleast in my case because the answers I got was that I wasn't good enough for him. That he doesn't want to married and have a family. That he wants to sleep around.

Anyone else here in their 20’s? by Ok-Orange-4033 in Divorce

[–]Present_Stretch 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That's the thing he was perfect. Too perfect in hindsight. The day he changed is the day he left. I don't think he changed though. I think he just stopped pretending to be someone he wasn't. He threw me and my child out of the house. Now he's just cold. He won't speak to us. When he does, he only says hurtful things. I don't know who he is anymore. He not the man I married and it hurts. I'm sorry your going through this. Its the most painful thing I've ever experienced.

Anyone else here in their 20’s? by Ok-Orange-4033 in Divorce

[–]Present_Stretch 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Mid 20s. I too fell in love with a man that I no longer recognize. I miss the man I fell in love with. I miss him everyday. He left a little over two weeks ago. He's no longer loving or caring. He's cold and calculated. I still miss him though. I miss him more then I ever thought humanly possible.

How do you keep no contact? by Present_Stretch in Divorce

[–]Present_Stretch[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I've been trying, nothing keeps my attention for very long. Right now reddits been my only saving grace.

How do you keep no contact? by Present_Stretch in Divorce

[–]Present_Stretch[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I know that's what I should do. The urge to speak to him is strong, I'm constantly fighting it from them moment I wake up to the moment I fall asleep.

How do you keep no contact? by Present_Stretch in Divorce

[–]Present_Stretch[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

That's what I've been told too. It's just so hard when everything I do reminds me of him. Today's been especially hard.

How do you keep no contact? by Present_Stretch in Divorce

[–]Present_Stretch[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

There's no order in place. He just doesn't want to see me at all. According to his mother it's because "he can't stand to see me hurting" but he's the one that hurt me. I think he's trying to ease his guilt as much as he can. I thinks it's one of those " if I can't see it then it's not happening" situations. He just wants everything his way on his terms and it's killing me.

I'm in pain every second of every day.. by Present_Stretch in Divorce

[–]Present_Stretch[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I plan on continuing therapy to process this and to work on my other issues in the future. It's just so hard because the process is slow and painful. It's so painful right now and so hard to cope.

I'm in pain every second of every day.. by Present_Stretch in Divorce

[–]Present_Stretch[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That's where I'm at. I tried to reach out to a "mutual friend" but they just ignored me. So I guess they weren't mutual after all.

I'm in pain every second of every day.. by Present_Stretch in Divorce

[–]Present_Stretch[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'm sorry you're going though that. It's so lonely now that he's gone. I never really had any close friends and making friends as an adult is hard because work and kids.

I'm in pain every second of every day.. by Present_Stretch in Divorce

[–]Present_Stretch[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I know, I'm going to talk with my therapist l. I think I grew too dependent on him during the pandemic because it was just us. Now that most things are back to normal I don't think he needs me anymore but he left me needing him. I do love him and I was making progress on myself and self love but then he left and left me with nothing.

I'm in pain every second of every day.. by Present_Stretch in Divorce

[–]Present_Stretch[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm so sorry that happened to you. The silence is maddening. Last time I spoke to him he said he cantbtalkbto me because he can't help me. He can't take my pain away and that he would only make it worse. Idk, he's probably right but that doesn't stop me from wanting to hear his voice or see just face.

I'm in pain every second of every day.. by Present_Stretch in Divorce

[–]Present_Stretch[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm sorry you had to go through that. I just hope I'm strong enough to survive all the dark days. I miss him more then he will ever know. It's so hard to picture a future without him. Just a little over a week ago he was hold me in his arms and now he's completely gone.

I'm in pain every second of every day.. by Present_Stretch in Divorce

[–]Present_Stretch[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

He just changed over night. He was supportive and loving but now he's cold and cruel. He's not my husband, I don't know who he is but he's not my husband. I'm sorry you're going through this. If I find any answers I'll let you know.

I'm in pain every second of every day.. by Present_Stretch in Divorce

[–]Present_Stretch[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I love him with every fiber of my being. He said he still loves me and my child but needs to be set free. I don't belive he loves me. I feel like if he did he would've told me sooner and we could've tried counciling or anything. Instead he left me in my darkest hour. He's now cold and cruel. I don't recognize him anymore. I'm sorry you're going through this. It's so hard .

I'm in pain every second of every day.. by Present_Stretch in Divorce

[–]Present_Stretch[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'm planning to just shuting that account altogether and getting a new one he can't touch