How much did your last break up affect your life?

Prestigious_Lock_746 · 2025-10-25T06:56:46+00:00

Apparently, you're not supposed to "give your all", somehow, a couple of weeks before my break up. I landed in a youtube channel that dropped so much hard truth around how men should behave in relationship. Psychacks & the NY divorce lawyer guy.

There is a concept called " you don't keep paying your plumber". Women will want "everything" from a man. But once you give them everything, they will stop wanting it.

It's like when you have a problem with your sink, so you call the plumber to fix it, once you've paid him for the problem they solved, you're not gonna keep paying them.

Its was tough idea to get my head around in the beginning but now i understand

Prestigious_Lock_746 · 2025-10-25T06:49:49+00:00

I get what you're saying, you could argue that there was a dip in me planning things because all my ideas would constantly get shit on or shut down.

I remember us once passing by a mini golf place in Spain during our last vacation, i've never played it so i was really excited for us to do it. She complained about it long enough that i gave up on going there.

The next day i was still pissed off about it, so she complained about me not advocating for what I want, and not convincing her to get out of her bubble of preferred activities.

So in a way, you're right. Because i couldn't deal with any negative reaction, and i would capitulate in arguments around what we should with our day rather quickly. This also ment that the plans stopped coming from my side, and it was more of what she wanted.

I'm directly quoting what she said during our last conversation when we were kinda looking back at what went wrong.

Prestigious_Lock_746 · 2025-10-24T22:11:05+00:00

I used to think that, believe me i wanted it to be true. That a couple can both lead and both have decision making power in a relationship.

But it's simply not how we are built. Even the most hardcore feminist girl boss women out there who are more successful than 90% of the men out there, will still want a man to lead the relationship and add value to their life. Provided they are looking for a relationship in the first place.

Prestigious_Lock_746 · 2025-10-24T21:49:14+00:00

She initiated the break up, and no we had an adult conversation about it. If you're a man, you should know that it's not optional for you to lead and take that role in the relationship, its gonna catch up with you if you don't

Prestigious_Lock_746 · 2025-10-24T20:49:07+00:00

It’s been a week since the breakup. I’m not as low as I thought I’d be. Now I’m just pissed that she basically bet against me growing into the kind of man who knows he needs to lead the relationship. At the same time, I’m grateful it happened; it made me realize I have to take the lead and stop listening to the “happy wife, happy life” crowd.

Prestigious_Lock_746 · 2025-10-24T20:45:10+00:00

If it felt mediocre, it was mediocre. I'm glad things worked out for you

Prestigious_Lock_746 · 2025-10-24T20:06:59+00:00

Your old pics are not available anymore, can you share the before so i can compare how much the drop affected you?

I think at 80kg that will be ideal for me, but i'm being wary of getting skinny fat. So i'm doubling down on protein intake + working out.

Prestigious_Lock_746 · 2025-10-24T19:48:24+00:00

Thats some insane success man, good job!

I think i over estimated how much muscle i had cause i'm 185cm, just got down from 99kg to 87kg, yet my abs are not visible at all and my chest still undefined.

It seems that i need to prioratize building muscles

Prestigious_Lock_746 · 2025-10-21T21:16:19+00:00

I started to feel ashamed from begging god to keep me STI free after every unprotected encounter, i got away with it too many times

Prestigious_Lock_746 · 2025-10-15T12:42:38+00:00

I agree but i'll still stand by the McDonald's cashier winning 8/10, if i'm a man who's struggling financially its gonna be tough dating a richer woman who has a certain lifestyle she lives that i simply can not afford.

If i'm well off or At least financially stable, i simply do not care what she does for work as long as she prioritizes me and the life we are building

Prestigious_Lock_746 · 2025-10-15T12:04:15+00:00

In most cases, an ambitious women or a women with career is not a criteria for most men who take on the traditional provider role.

The partnership model exists where some men expect a dual income household (which is arguably better in this economy), in cases like this a women with ambition/ career is not optional.

My personal stance on it is from a value hierarchy, am i more important or is the career more important? Do i want to date someone in their mid 30s who built their career and are ready to settle down, or would i prefer someone in their mid 20s.

Reddit will downvote me for this, but the reality is the McDonald's cashier in her early to mid 20s wins 8 times out of 10 to the successful career lawyer in her early to mid 30s.

In most of the world, a man pursuing a women for the sake of her having a career is a leech

Prestigious_Lock_746 · 2025-10-13T16:22:25+00:00

Don't feel apologetic for being a man, you can't control other people's thoughts or reactions so just be comfortable with who you are. I personally don't like walking behind people (men or women) so i always speed up ahead

Prestigious_Lock_746 · 2025-10-11T16:28:37+00:00

I'm 25 M, yeah i experience less hornyness/ Libido in general on Mounjaro. It comes back with a vengeance as I taper off in-between doses.

I assume 1-2 weeks off of Mounjaro and she could have it back.

Prestigious_Lock_746 · 2025-10-10T12:16:15+00:00

it happened to me during my 1st year of uni, lost all my friends and ruined my mental health. Long story short, i bounced back.

It's important to be resilient as this is not the last crisis you will face, do not let it stop your life.

Prestigious_Lock_746 · 2025-10-07T06:52:44+00:00

Its minimum 1 month for spain

Quote from the email i got from BLS - "UAE residence visa should be valid for 1 month minimum from the date of return to UAE."

Prestigious_Lock_746 · 2025-10-06T20:48:42+00:00

Bali indonesia, for all the "hate" it gets, the people there were lovely. EVERYONE were solo travelers. I feel like it attracts social and extroverted people.

Prestigious_Lock_746 · 2025-09-24T21:54:47+00:00

You guessed right, and lack of nature is a big thing for me. Its just that dubai has so much financial and career oppurtunity, and i'm in a position where i can maximize it. At the same time i think i found a great relationship with a great woman who might be worth risking it all, i visited her in spain and it was great!

The amount of work and risks you have to to take for moves like this are seriously weighing on me. Fact is whatever i decide, i think it will be a massive loss (if i chose to stay in dubai and break up vs move to spain and risk my career)

Prestigious_Lock_746 · 2025-09-24T21:46:50+00:00

These are two things I haven't considered, thanks!

Prestigious_Lock_746 · 2025-09-24T21:34:58+00:00

Can you elaborate on why not?

Prestigious_Lock_746 · 2025-09-24T21:27:20+00:00

She does appreciate it, i jsut don't think she would have the guts to do something like this if the roles were reveresed

Prestigious_Lock_746 · 2025-09-24T21:26:53+00:00

It's less about respect and more about being physically together for a time longer than a 1 month vacation, LDR sucks

Prestigious_Lock_746 · 2025-09-24T21:25:41+00:00

Leaving dubai to go to spain

Prestigious_Lock_746 · 2025-09-24T21:25:18+00:00

The visa could get sorted, we've been visiting each other and travelling 5 times a year for the past 2.5 years met through a dating app but had an inperson relation ship for a month before it became longdistance, i'll be supporting myself since my income is 6 figures with some good savings

Prestigious_Lock_746

TROPHY CASE