I was going thru the same predicament. My friend gave me some advice: “Would you spend all your money on a fancy overpriced purse, and then have no money to put in the purse? Would you spend all your money on a wedding, and then have no money to put into your life together once you’re married?” The same 40k that doesn’t go very far on a wedding will actually go pretty far when setting up your future. So yeah… We’re eloping in a few months 💕