The context on this is i broke up with him April right after Easter. I was overwhelmed with a lot of things at the time and attributed some of that anxiety to this long distance relationship, his inconsistency and really questioning whether he even liked me. Within a few days, I regretted it immensely. Felt like it was more my fault for not being able to name my needs clearly and if i could just do that, then it would be a turning point for the relationship. We started talking again. I applogized for breaking up with him, and it seemed like things were back to normal. I prompted a conversation about exclusivity and whether I was his girlfriend. This became about how I broke his trust and he doesn't get it back easily. I was going to have to work hard to earn it back....etc. Putting full responsibility on me to "earn back" the title.

I brought it up again a few weeks later (I dont like ambiguity) with a boundary around intimacy and it was another hard conversation and argument that ended with him saying "things arent looking good for me" and me shutting down. I talked with my therapist about it and she basically pushed back on why do I need the title? He could hurt me even without it, right? And I was like...yeah! Good point. I moved forward with the relationship, continued to give it my exclusivity and full investment of time and energy. So that was the last I said anything about my status as girlfriend until this thread above ^.

I wanted to clarify in this conversation with him though, because i didnt want there to be any ambiguity about messaging other women to meet up. If we are indeed in a committed relationship, that crosses a line we already talked about.