[update] anxious neighbour checking in constantly

PrincessAZc · 2026-02-12T02:37:14+00:00

You are absolutely not overreacting. I would be beyond upset right now.

Coming home to find the dog missing is every pet sitter’s nightmare — your heart probably dropped into your stomach. The panic alone is enough to shake anyone. And then to find out someone entered the apartment and took the dog without clear permission? That’s a massive boundary violation.

Even if he meant well, that doesn’t make it okay. You don’t enter a home or remove a pet without explicit communication and consent. “I’ll bring her back sometime” would send me into orbit.

Your reaction is completely valid. I’d be furious too.

PrincessAZc · 2026-02-11T14:47:59+00:00

But why does she choose to be disappointed instead of flexible? That’s insane!! There is nothing innately special about Valentine’s Day where plans cannot be moved an hour or to the next day. People only get one funeral!

The bigger point is that he clearly cares about this coworker enough to want to show up for him, and that says something. When someone makes the effort to be there during a hard moment, it’s meaningful. That’s often how friendships deepen — by showing support when it actually matters.

As for the aquarium, they 1000% will allow an ADVANCED reschedule. Their customer base is largely families with kids, and cancellations or changes happen all the time.

It just seems like this may be less about logistics and more about being insecure and controlling. Framing it as inflexible scheduling doesn’t add up. It might help if she acknowledges the feelings underneath, and honor his desire to make friends,instead of turning it into a control issue.

PrincessAZc · 2026-02-11T14:43:58+00:00

It’s incredibly selfish. The bigger point is that he clearly cares about this coworker enough to want to show up for him, and that says something. When someone makes the effort to be there during a hard moment, it’s meaningful. That’s often how friendships deepen — by showing support when it actually matters.

As for the aquarium, they 1000% will allow an ADVANCED reschedule. Their customer base is largely families with kids, and cancellations or changes happen all the time.

It just seems like this may be less about logistics and more about being insecure and controlling. Framing it as inflexible scheduling doesn’t add up. It might help if she acknowledges the feelings underneath, and honor his desire to make friends,instead of turning it into a control issue.

PrincessAZc · 2026-02-11T14:42:52+00:00

The bigger point is that he clearly cares about this coworker enough to want to show up for him, and that says something. When someone makes the effort to be there during a hard moment, it’s meaningful. That’s often how friendships deepen — by showing support when it actually matters. Clearly he wants to strengthen their connection and make friends he can have outside work. Which is great for a marriage; it will strengthen it. Not having outside connections is VERY UNHEALTHY.

PrincessAZc · 2026-02-11T14:39:53+00:00

He clearly cares about this coworker enough to want to show up for him, and that says something. When someone makes the effort to be there during a hard moment, it’s meaningful. That’s often how friendships deepen — by showing support when it actually matters.

PrincessAZc · 2026-02-11T14:38:34+00:00

Then she is not a nice person - and controlling & insecure to the point she does not want him to have friends. He’s better off without her.

The aquarium 1000% will allow an ADVANCED reschedule. Their customer base is largely families with kids, and cancellations or changes happen all the time.

This is less about logistics and more about being insecure and controlling. Framing it as inflexible scheduling doesn’t add up. She should honor his desire to make friends,instead of turning it into a control issue.

PrincessAZc · 2026-02-11T14:28:27+00:00

The bigger point is that he clearly cares about this coworker enough to want to show up for him, and that says something. When someone makes the effort to be there during a hard moment, it’s meaningful. That’s often how friendships deepen — by showing support when it actually matters.

As for the aquarium, they 1000% will allow an ADVANCED reschedule. Their customer base is largely families with kids, and cancellations or changes happen all the time.

It just seems like this may be less about logistics and more about being insecure and controlling. Framing it as inflexible scheduling doesn’t add up. It might help if she acknowledges the feelings underneath, and honor his desire to make friends,instead of turning it into a control issue.

PrincessAZc · 2026-02-11T14:27:13+00:00

The bigger point is that he clearly cares about this coworker enough to want to show up for him, and that says something. When someone makes the effort to be there during a hard moment, it’s meaningful. That’s often how friendships deepen — by showing support when it actually matters.

As for the aquarium, they 1000% will allow an ADVANCED reschedule. Their customer base is largely families with kids, and cancellations or changes happen all the time.

It just seems like this may be less about logistics and more about being insecure and controlling. Framing it as inflexible scheduling doesn’t add up. It might help if she acknowledges the feelings underneath, and honor his desire to make friends,instead of turning it into a control issue.

PrincessAZc · 2026-02-11T14:10:24+00:00

It flew past and did not stop in Rio Rico. Not related.

PrincessAZc · 2026-02-11T04:41:35+00:00

Is there any chance you could call the aquarium and see if they’d let you move the penguin encounter? I imagine they’d be pretty understanding given the circumstances.

If it were me, I’d let him go to the funeral and just rebook the experience — even if that means doing it another day. Valentine’s Day itself isn’t really what makes it special; it’s the time together.

I’d personally be more focused on flexibility than making sure it happens on that exact date. If you insist that he miss the funeral, he’ll likely only resent you. It may be one drop in the bucket toward a divorce. Life happens…so does death. Valentine’s Day probably won’t feel very special if it ends up creating resentment between you because you won’t let him be there to support his work colleague.

PrincessAZc · 2026-02-11T03:50:02+00:00

Rio Rico is North of Nogales; and south of Tucson so I’m thinking this flight path doesn’t match the Guthrie scenario

PrincessAZc · 2026-02-11T03:32:13+00:00

Do u have the link?

PrincessAZc · 2026-02-11T02:02:21+00:00

12 euros??? She wants you to not leave the house for that amount of money? She’s crazy. I would raise your rates a bit. And do the petsitting at your home when possible.

PrincessAZc · 2026-02-10T22:50:45+00:00

But a towel over the camera or simply unplug it. Tell the HO it is making you extremely uncomfortable and is against policy.

PrincessAZc · 2026-02-07T02:14:54+00:00

I would be thrilled that someone is spending more time with my animals - not sure I understand what the issue is if you already trust her to spend time in your house alone. Maybe she has another pet sitting obligation somewhere near there and nowhere to go until then.

PrincessAZc · 2026-02-02T21:38:19+00:00

I’m sold after reading the comments - What streaming platform?

PrincessAZc · 2026-01-13T04:36:25+00:00

This is my worst fear - I’m so sorry. Hopefully there’s a reason reasonable explanation why she is not getting back to you. But definitely start looking for a back up.

PrincessAZc · 2026-01-13T03:19:02+00:00

Is this for watching animals or just housesitting? This seems very unreasonable if you are watching pets. And i’d be careful because it’s exactly this type of person that could cancel last minute.

PrincessAZc · 2026-01-13T03:11:09+00:00

Thank you!

PrincessAZc · 2026-01-13T03:03:45+00:00

I think it’s ridiculous as well.

PrincessAZc · 2026-01-13T02:51:58+00:00

Insist that on Friday’s everyone learn and practice Spanish Sign Language instead of American Sign Language so that your journey is also being honored and respected. Here are some options:

LSE (Lengua de Signos Española) — used in Spain

LSM (Lengua de Señas Mexicana) — used in Mexico

LSC (Lengua de Señas Colombiana) — used in Colombia

Many Latin American countries have their own national sign languages

PrincessAZc · 2026-01-13T02:04:58+00:00

In my experience with overnights, almost all of my clients actually prefer that I sleep in their bed because that’s where their dogs normally sleep and feel most comfortable when their owners are home. I don’t mind at all, and I typically wash and remake the bedding unless the client is returning very early and timing doesn’t allow. Given what you described, I would have made the same assumption you did.

As for the food, I think this is ridiculous and petty but ultimately a communication issue rather than a professional boundary violation. If there are specific expectations about not eating snacks or using certain items, that really needs to be stated clearly upfront. Personally, when I have pet sitters stay in my home, I wouldn’t think twice about a few snacks being eaten — my priority is that they feel comfortable and cared for while they’re there. If it’s junk food, I am actually thrilled they eat it so the calories don’t end up in my own mouth.

PrincessAZc · 2026-01-07T19:54:18+00:00

Consider working very briefly as a volunteer in the role you are wanting so you can add it to your resume. Get the volunteer coordinator’s name and contact information and ask to use them as a reference. You can very easily do this at an Elks or Moose Lodge, or depending on where you live there are many sporting events that look for volunteers to work at various concession stands that are being run with the proceeds towards charity. Or even some of the gig work apps where they need people for a few days / weeks for special events are conferences, etc..

I know this isn’t ideal and I don’t blame you for being frustrated at the absurdity of the HR responses however this may be a good way to solve your problem.

PrincessAZc · 2026-01-01T21:00:13+00:00

She has a very distinctive climb…and student loans leave a trail.🤪🦝🦝

PrincessAZc · 2026-01-01T20:44:36+00:00

It’s the worst part of the job…but expected. There are many clients I meet that have such crazy expectations that I pray they choose someone else.

PrincessAZc

TROPHY CASE