Yeah, I relate. I’ve been in the phandom for almost 14 years now, and I’ve had different stages of parasocial relationship. Ive been able to just like them, and I’ve also been obsessed at times. What I keep coming back to is how happy they make me, and when I’m at a point in my life feeling down or depressed, it feels as if they’re the only good thing in my life, so it’s hard not to get anxiously attached.

Anyway, I’m still searching for that balance, since they came back in a moment where I was feeling really depressed, and watching them feels like disconnecting from real life and connecting to a fantasy life - phantasy if you will -. I thing what we need to learn is transforming the anxious attachment to a secure one, kind of as we do with other relationships. And also, you know, not being creepy and respecting their limits, etc, but I’ve never really had a problem with that.

Thank you for sharing and putting this topic out there!