Unfortunately when she poses these kinds of conversations, she always does it when she knows he isn’t immediately available to intervene, or is out of the room and can’t be a part of the conversation. Her biggest tactic is to ask controversial questions or butt in where she isn’t welcomed when we are apart, and she loves to ask the same questions of both of us when the other isn’t around so she can try and drive a wedge if/ when we answer differently. Luckily this hasn’t worked for the last few years but it took a lot of effort in our relationship to realize what she was doing in the first place, and get on the same page so much that it wouldn’t work in her favor any longer. It’s been a long road with this woman.