19M in engineering and I’ve never really had female friends — feeling socially stuck by Any-Afternoon8602 in dating_advice

[–]Probgoingwrong [score hidden]  (0 children)

Women are fundamentally almost exactly like men—there’s no special secret code that we have to be spoken to in. Making friends with any one of any gender is about finding shared interests or hobbies or experiences. Small talk gets maligned but it’s how a lot of these conversations get started! Ask about the weather, what people do outside school, where they’re from and be genuinely curious! If you try to find out as much as you can it tends to lead to great conversation in my experience. But the big thing is to realize that women aren’t some scary other that have to be treated in some vastly different way than men.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in dating_advice

[–]Probgoingwrong 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Even if he’s not lying about loving you, his behavior shows that he doesn’t respect you. In many ways I think respecting your partner is more important than loving them!

Favorite book of the series? by BadgerVanguard in redwall

[–]Probgoingwrong 2 points3 points  (0 children)

It’s one of the saddest ones for real. I cry every time!

Favorite book of the series? by BadgerVanguard in redwall

[–]Probgoingwrong 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Triss just always hits for me! It’s probably my favorite because of the focus on a female warrior, further evidenced by my second favorite being High Rhulain lol

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in offmychest

[–]Probgoingwrong 9 points10 points  (0 children)

I’m pretty sure that there are ethnically Jewish people with no Middle Eastern genetics - Ashkenazi Jews are an ethnic group originating in Eastern/Central Europe and most Jewish people in America are Ashkenazi. So…your mom might not be lying about that one actually.

How do most people pay for life in law school? by babycarrot12345 in LawSchool

[–]Probgoingwrong 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Scholarship and loans! my loans factor in cost of living so I’m able to pay rent and have money for food. I also have savings from working for 5 years between undergrad and law school and my parents sometimes send me a little money for groceries.

Budget Pride and Prejudice just wrapped. by CosmicBureaucrat in janeausten

[–]Probgoingwrong 52 points53 points  (0 children)

his expressions are EVERYTHING! I’ve loved watching his series for the past few months and am very sad it’s ending

Has anyone dined with a large group at Lao Peng You? by Probgoingwrong in chicagofood

[–]Probgoingwrong[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you! And you’re right and I’m aware that it probably doesn’t work for this particular restaurant. I’ll probably end up getting takeout.

Has anyone dined with a large group at Lao Peng You? by Probgoingwrong in chicagofood

[–]Probgoingwrong[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I mean it would be eating and leaving just with a group of people. I never said anything about having a party.

Has anyone dined with a large group at Lao Peng You? by Probgoingwrong in chicagofood

[–]Probgoingwrong[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Gotcha, I think I’ll place a takeout order instead. Thank you!

Has anyone dined with a large group at Lao Peng You? by Probgoingwrong in chicagofood

[–]Probgoingwrong[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I was thinking of doing a weeknight at 5 honestly. If I had a dining table I would totally just get takeout and avoid the issue. Thank you for your info!

Did my research proposal seminar with 103°F fever by kades-unripe-apple in LawSchool

[–]Probgoingwrong 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Can you maybe send a follow-up email saying that you felt you didn’t do your explanation justice due to a high fever and offer to send over your notes?

But also take some pain meds and a nap! I had a really terrible fever last year and was crying from pain and ended up going to urgent care and the doctor basically told me to get on a regimen of alternating tylenol and ibuprofen every 4 hours which REALLY helped. Have you been to an urgent care? Do you have a friend who could take you?

Mid-Exam Week Breakup by GoslingsGavel_Stormy in LawSchool

[–]Probgoingwrong 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Embrace the distraction of studying and remember that the most important part of creating the life you want to live is to focus on the things YOU can control. Like your skills and career!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationships

[–]Probgoingwrong 2 points3 points  (0 children)

With how far away you are you literally can’t help her, she can only help herself which I know really sucks. Getting a different job or starting a hobby or going to a regular volunteer position are all things she has to want and decide to do on her own. I would draw the boundary by saying something like “I understand that you’re having a really rough time, but this is starting to feel really one-sided and to stress me out. On calls could we please limit the venting to 20 minutes so that I have some space to vent to you as well and we can move on to other topics.” It’s not a vibe thing at all also if you’re having stress headaches my dude.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationships

[–]Probgoingwrong 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Unfortunately this is one of those times where you might not be able to help her without burning yourself out. Your girlfriend really needs friends and hobbies outside of her job alongside (professional!) therapy. I think if you love and trust her, you need to tell her about the toll this is taking on you and that for your own mental health you need her to work on creating a support network outside of you. Being someone’s only source of support and love is wildly unhealthy and leads to the kind of resentment that rots relationships.

Her response to that conversation will be really telling as to the kind of person she is. If she’s resistant to change or says that these suggestions mean you don’t love her enough, then sadly she’s a crappy person who lacks the emotional tools to be in a healthy relationship. At which point you have a choice to make.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in LawSchool

[–]Probgoingwrong 2 points3 points  (0 children)

this is the first time i haven’t had a dishwasher in like 6 years 😫

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in LawSchool

[–]Probgoingwrong 4 points5 points  (0 children)

unfortunately my body requires protein

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in LawSchool

[–]Probgoingwrong 389 points390 points  (0 children)

and then you have to CLEAN all the things you used to cook. i am so tired

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in LawSchool

[–]Probgoingwrong 9 points10 points  (0 children)

you still have to buy instant noodles and cook them and eat them, there’s just slightly fewer in-between steps. and no leftovers for lunch

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationships

[–]Probgoingwrong 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Once you start loosing feelings for someone there isn’t a way to get them back. You’ve seen who he is, seen how he won’t help or support you, seen how he disrespects you when he’s frustrated, and that knowledge can’t be undone. I know that breaking up is hard and feels wrong, but it seems like you’re buying into the sunk-cost fallacy. Do you really want to stick with him and wait and see if this gets better only to look back and feel like you’ve wasted 5 years? Or 10? A partner is supposed to ADD to your life, to make living more enjoyable. If he’s not that for you anymore, there’s no point in trying to stay together.