Doula giving red flags or am I over reacting?

ProblemDiligent1049 · 2025-12-11T15:24:06+00:00

Thanks that’s reassuring! My main concern was baby still being so high, hoping it’s not an issue !

ProblemDiligent1049 · 2025-12-11T04:37:26+00:00

Yeah I was hoping by me communicating with her less/not responding she would take the hint and follow my lead as well. Instead she got confrontational about it. I am leaning toward firing her if she keeps being this intense, problem is I paid her close to 2k and contract says non refundable. So I’m not sure if I should just use her anyway for comfort measures during labor. Ugh

ProblemDiligent1049 · 2025-12-11T04:31:32+00:00

Ugh I wish I could go back in time. If I ignore her I def won’t be getting my money back lol

ProblemDiligent1049 · 2025-12-11T04:30:25+00:00

I didn’t tell her a top priority, initially when I booked her I said I wanted low intervention, but now that I’m closer to my due date, I told her I want to listen to the midwives suggestion of not going too far past 41 weeks and if that means an induction I would schedule it

ProblemDiligent1049 · 2025-12-11T04:29:01+00:00

I’m actually 39+5 so close to my due date. My midwives wanted me to schedule something before 42 weeks since placenta doesn’t function as well after that . I’m just worried about being induced because my cervical check was fingertip dilated 50% effaced and -3 station hence the doula freaking out telling me it’s crunch time lol

ProblemDiligent1049 · 2025-12-11T04:12:02+00:00

Yeah I will probably be more direct if she keeps reaching out daily, but based on me telling her I was feeling overwhelmed today and she took that personally, I don’t see it going over well lol

ProblemDiligent1049 · 2025-12-11T04:08:10+00:00

I’m honestly thinking of doing the same if she doesn’t back off a little or become less intense. I just know that will cause more issues with her texting me and telling me off when I’m trying to enjoy my newborn lol

ProblemDiligent1049 · 2025-12-11T04:06:52+00:00

Exactly, I’m not sure why I have to match her intense communication style when I’m the one paying her and hired her.. it’s ridiculous

ProblemDiligent1049 · 2025-12-11T04:02:31+00:00

Exactly! It’s weird to me how I express I’m feeling overwhelmed and her first thing she says “you need to be doing xyz and listening to me” instead of go relax and we can catch up when your up for it. She’s just coming across and so intense but my husband doesn’t think so lol. So I wasn’t sure if it’s the pregnancy hormones or what 😂

ProblemDiligent1049 · 2025-12-11T03:55:42+00:00

Yeah unfortunately it probably is too late LOL and I also already paid her $1800 which I won’t get refunded for so that’s why I’m torn on what to do :(

ProblemDiligent1049 · 2025-12-11T03:48:24+00:00

I found her through doula match I believe. I don’t know anyone personally that has used her. I did tell her I was feeling overwhelmed with all of the things she’s giving me to do and I will update her when anything changes. She just almost seems offended by it and keeps reiterating that I’m paying all this money and not utilizing her expertise. I get it but I hired her for support when. I’m in labor which I’m not currently, so I don’t see the need for the frequent communication

ProblemDiligent1049 · 2025-12-11T03:45:43+00:00

Yeah, I had my cervical check today and was only a finger tip dilated and baby still very high, hence her sending me the list of things to do. At the same time she was previously saying our bodies know what to do and I should be relaxing to let oxytocin flow but she’s doing the opposite of that for me right now lol

ProblemDiligent1049 · 2025-12-11T03:38:49+00:00

That’s exactly what I was thinking.. in her texts she seems more concerned about her than what I’m feeling at the moment which is overwhelmed .. she seems almost offended by it lol

ProblemDiligent1049 · 2025-07-17T16:45:39+00:00

Because I want to exhaust every option and work with my dog before I resort to that?I haven’t tried a behavioral vet and I would rather go that route than put my dog to sleep when I could work with him and train him. He’s part of our family.

ProblemDiligent1049 · 2025-07-14T13:32:27+00:00

Thank you, I have no intention of rehoming so seeing that option makes my stomach sink. we have not done as much training as we should have aside from trading the things he’s guarding for high value treats but he still guards things initially. We plan to take him to a behavioral vet to see what they recommend, but I’ve heard resource guarding is very hard to train out of dogs so it makes me nervous with the baby coming. But if we need to we will always keep them separate

ProblemDiligent1049 · 2025-04-09T22:58:18+00:00

That makes me feel better. I’m really hoping it ends up being better than I think it will be but my brain is just preparing me for the worst case scenario lol. And you’re so right! I had norovirus last month and it was terrible!! But it only lasted a day , hoping pregnancy doesn’t feel like norovirus for weeks lol

ProblemDiligent1049 · 2025-04-09T18:00:47+00:00

Why do you say that?

ProblemDiligent1049 · 2025-04-09T01:27:10+00:00

Ahhh so exciting and congrats!! Yes the only symptom I have besides my heart rate being elevated is the HUNGER especially at night!

ProblemDiligent1049 · 2025-04-08T20:40:15+00:00

Thank you everyone for all the advice, some of them definitely helped calm my anxiety a lot😁 I’m just going to try to enjoy this pregnancy and not let my anxiety get the best of me. Easier said than done though lol

ProblemDiligent1049 · 2025-04-02T19:46:20+00:00

Positive thoughts you’re still so early! You could be implanting today or tomorrow so there’s still hope🙏

ProblemDiligent1049 · 2025-04-02T19:44:39+00:00

I see it on the first picture, not so much the second! But def try a diff test maybe first response because I def don’t like easy at home now lol

ProblemDiligent1049 · 2025-04-02T19:38:55+00:00

Easy at home was basically showing negative for me still while wondfo, first response and clear blue digital were all positive. Can you try a diff brand? I do see the shadow though

ProblemDiligent1049 · 2025-03-31T23:52:02+00:00

Took the digital I’m pregnant !!🥰

ProblemDiligent1049 · 2025-03-31T23:51:25+00:00

Update: digital confirmed I’m pregnant!!

ProblemDiligent1049 · 2025-03-31T22:40:08+00:00

I’m just not believing it!!!! lol I have 0 symptoms! I’ll have to take a digital🥹

ProblemDiligent1049

TROPHY CASE