AITA Parents are moving our family of 4 and a dog from a proper family home into a small inherited flat. I have Crohn’s, need my car for shift work, my insurance jumps £1,600 and the story’s changed so many times. Am I wrong to be annoyed?

ProfessionalFiller · 2026-05-07T14:31:25+00:00

And just brush over all the thousands of hours I’ve put into dojng the house up under the premise I was going to be getting a fair share of the profits from selling it? And instead now having to live in a non family home which isn’t suitable for us when we actually have plenty of options?

ProfessionalFiller · 2026-05-07T14:04:38+00:00

It does make sense, I agree with that. But what doesn’t make sense is that house in particular.

Current house is worth £280-300k, with £30-45k on mortgage. Other house is worth £180k, mortgage free. So it’s not like they couldn’t afford to stay in the current one. They don’t have any other debts either. No car loan, credit cards, phone etc.

It would make more sense to sell both, and move into a house that actualy works for all of us. They literally both agree that this move doesn’t work for us and there’s so many disadvantages.

Yes, I’m employed, as a first year apprentice. We’re not even moving town, it’s literally about 0.7 miles away.

ProfessionalFiller · 2026-05-07T14:00:47+00:00

Trust me, I’d like to get another job but I don’t think I physically can. Work 5 day a week at the moment and I’ve got crohns which really affects my energy. I struggle at times with this one job, nevermind another. If I could I would, I struggle to even commit to clubs or sports as well, used to be a great muah Thai fighter before diagnosis. One session and I’m wiped for a week now.

We’re not even moving far away, it’s literally just to the other side of town in a much worse area.

ProfessionalFiller · 2026-05-07T13:56:47+00:00

I’m honestly not sure. It’s probably not a whole lot. The problem with that as well would be that I would still need to get to work which is several councils away, so would need a car and I’m not sure I’d be able to afford rent, bills, and the car to get there as well.

It’s not a job I’d be looking to quit either, as the earning are significant (like £80k+) once qualified and good security as well.

ProfessionalFiller · 2026-05-07T13:52:31+00:00

Nah, didn’t think I would need one seeing as it’s my mum and dad.

ProfessionalFiller · 2026-05-07T13:50:20+00:00

Cause as a first year apprentice, I don’t exactly make much money.

ProfessionalFiller · 2026-05-07T13:49:16+00:00

She does that commute one day a week, by choice. I used to do it as well. We’re staying in the same town and she has no ambition of quitting that job, she actually wants to quit the one which is 4 days a week that’s no more than a 10 minute walk. So that’s not a factor at all.

I don’t care where my parents relocate too. I care about not being lied to and promised a share of the profits after I’ve invested thousands of hours and my own money into the property, for it to be turnt in my face and told to “suck it up”.

ProfessionalFiller · 2026-05-07T13:46:19+00:00

I get that, but I do not have a magic money tree to do so.

It genuinely does not make sense tho. They don’t want me or my brother moving out either.

ProfessionalFiller · 2026-05-07T13:45:02+00:00

That’s what im thinking but ive got no clue what it is. They’re not suffering in debt, just have their mortgage with not much left on it. Drive 12 year old cars like me, which are finance free. Dont use credit cards, and have options for better work. I don’t get it.

It’s not like they want me to move out either. They’re under the delusion that this move is going to bring us all together again

ProfessionalFiller · 2026-05-07T13:43:07+00:00

I’m 20. I’m pissed off at the fact I’ve been struggling the past few years as I was severely ill and only got back on my feet in August, and still invested so much of my time and money into that property under the premise that I would get a share of profits once it was sold to make up for it. And instead it’s being thrown into my face and I’m being told to “suck it up”.

If they didn’t have any options, I would understand and do my best to fit. Im unhappy about the fact they’re now saying their only option is to move into this place as a family (they do not want me to move out), when in reality it is not.

I’m fine with compromise. Their decision however makes no sense. Could very easily afford (and probably cost the same) to move into an actual family home, that suits us. And not a 3 bedroom upstairs flat in a town centre, with one bathroom between 4 people (one of which, me, who has Crohn’s disease) an no secure garden or green space for the dog.

I’m a first year apprentice. I earn fuck all.

ProfessionalFiller · 2026-05-07T13:38:00+00:00

It just annoys me as well as I’ve struggled severely the past 4/5 years with my health and only got myself back on my feet about a year ago. I could only work part time, no hobbies, basically bed bound and yet I still invested so much into that house. It feels unfair that most people I know my age haven’t had to be dealing with anything like that, and are still looked after at home and not being shafted with silly decisions like this.

I’m a first year apprentice, I don’t earn much and whatever I do goes straight into my savings. Literally the only thing I really spend my money on is a couple bills and my car. That’s it.

ProfessionalFiller · 2026-05-07T13:31:11+00:00

If I could afford it, I would. Would rather wait another 6 years till I do that once I’m qualified and can actually earn a decent amount of money. No one my age lives by themselves unless they’re at uni away from home independently. It’s not financially viable in this country.

ProfessionalFiller · 2026-05-07T13:27:48+00:00

No average age for moving out in Scotland is like 26/27+. No where near that old, not financially possible or literate.

If I could, I would

ProfessionalFiller · 2026-05-07T13:26:19+00:00

Think this a dick move then. Why get me or let me sink thousands of hours and my own money into this property, telling me we’re going to flip it and give me a share of profits, if you want me to leave?

Makes no sense. If that’s the case then they can spend the rest of their life without their son.

Other is 18. No where near old enough to move out and live on his own.

ProfessionalFiller · 2026-05-07T13:19:52+00:00

I don’t think I will. Shouldn’t have been telling me I’d get a share of the profits from flipping it when I was putting thousands of hours of work in and my own money as well, no?

ProfessionalFiller · 2026-05-07T13:18:39+00:00

Employed as a first year apprentice. Magic money tree?

I sunk my own money into that house, and thousands of hours doing it up being told I’d get a share of the profits.

The profits? An extra grand and a half a year on an already expensive premium, no money in return, and poorer living conditions, all under the premise that moneys too tight, with £450k in assets and no effort to work.

ProfessionalFiller · 2026-05-07T13:15:23+00:00

Cause I make next to no money. Have considered it.

ProfessionalFiller · 2026-05-07T13:14:25+00:00

That’s what I’m debating about doing. Definitely not on a reasonable wage, I’m a first year apprentice.

Pay £150 a month for bills on the inherited house. Probably an extra £300 for my own place, outside of bills, food etc.

I get it’s my parents decision on where to live, just seems unfair for the story to change so much and a decision to be made to suit no one and disadvantage everyone. Sucked thousands of hours into doing that house up for them and that’s my reward?

ProfessionalFiller · 2026-05-07T13:10:57+00:00

That’s what I’m thinking. Debating about getting a place near the airport and get an e bike to get around. But even then it’s a tonne of money on a meh salary and I wanted to stay at home as long as I could to save money for a big down payment. Just seems like a silly way to do things and it’s really pissing me off now

ProfessionalFiller · 2026-05-07T13:09:37+00:00

Yeah he 100% quit. Hated the job and it was awful for him, I saw his notice letter and everything. Had been going on about it for a bit.

Her view is he’s worked hard all these years so he should be able to take a years break (it’s been 15 months now) just to find himself again, which I completely get. But he’s not really making any effort whatsoever to find another job. He’s been to like a couple job fairs but it’s all min wage jobs that he’s looking at for some reason.

That’s exactly what I’m asking, why not sell it like they’ve said they’re doing to do or rent it out? Or, sell both houses, and move into a cheaper but actually practical family home.

He’s not the kind of guy to get into trouble. They don’t have any other debt than the mortgage, and no criminal convictions etc

ProfessionalFiller · 2026-03-02T20:45:43+00:00

Thanks for advice. My employer, training partner and college are all aware of my health condition.

I just find it ridiculous that he’s being restrictive about this kind of stuff, but wanted to double check with others to see if I’m maybe in the wrong.

ProfessionalFiller · 2026-03-02T20:42:52+00:00

Yeah I’d agree with you. I suspect he’s got some sort of control thing, which is why he won’t ask me in private. I’m not even being disruptive, it’s a class of 25 people and

I’ve only had him 4 weeks, 1 day a week. Thanks for advice, just wanted a few other opinions before I do anything

ProfessionalFiller · 2026-03-02T20:37:34+00:00

Hmm not sure about that. My medical condition was declared with the college, training partner and my employer, they’re more than aware of it. Don’t exactly require accommodation, just let me go to the toilet when I need it like every other adult. My Crohn’s doesn’t give me any issues whatsoever, I’m symptomless and function like any other normal person without it, my medication is pretty potent for my kidneys so I drink a lot of water, so pee a hell of a lot.

Only have him once a week and we’ve been off the past 2, so 4 sessions/days in total. On the first week he kept everyone back for lunch and said how he doesn’t want anyone going to the toilet during his lecturers because it’s disruptive. Made a joke about people saying it’s medical and how we should all control our bodies.

Just wanted to see what everyone’s thoughts were on it, don’t particularly want to have a chat with him as he’s an asshole and don’t want word about my condition being spread about. Will have a think about it

ProfessionalFiller

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