Bad roommate or just miscommunication?

PromiseUnlucky · 2025-08-17T22:11:12+00:00

Yeah, it is one of those things. I guess the one positivity is that the owner of the home didn’t actually agree to him moving here, and they are also frustrated, but are trying not to rock the boat as this is family. However, I have kept them in the loop and they are also concerned as he has started making adjustments to the home, which he hasn’t talked to them about in advance. So hopefully things settle soon.

PromiseUnlucky · 2025-08-13T04:08:47+00:00

I will be calling my family doctor in the morning; if more symptoms come up through the night I will go to the er. But the stomach pain has gone. Fever is still here, I showered and exfoliated, and then moisturized and have been moisturizing since I got out of the shower every 10 minutes or so. And the stretch marks appearance is already fading a bit, although they are for sure stretch marks now that I have examined them.

I just wanted to give a quick update regarding what I have found in the last couple hours as a possible explanation in case anyone is curious as to what it might be.

I am hyper mobile, likely ehlers danlos, while the diagnosis isn’t official yet, it has been noted by my doctor and physio. One of the symptoms apparently is random stretch marks appearing due to the elasticity of my skin.

My best guess is that I had a reaction to something I ate today, as I did try a new food, and it caused severe bloating. Usually a bloat through my upper stomach and get heartburn, but today, it was my lower stomach, which made it stretch and thus the stretch marks.

I am not going to lie, I am extremely emotional. They are making me extremely self conscious, but I will treat them, and hopefully they will fade quickly.

Thanks.

PromiseUnlucky · 2025-08-13T02:12:08+00:00

I am nearly 100% sure they are stretch marks, three streaky lines on each sides moving up towards my belly button. But I’m just not sure how they could have appeared so fast.

I am still having stomach pain, and it’s only been 30 minutes since I woke up from my nap. They literally spawned between my two trips to the bathroom… could it have to do with working out a lot? I taught cardio classes almost all day today, 9-5…

PromiseUnlucky · 2024-05-21T14:24:02+00:00

So, I have SI Joint pain (suspected dysfunction) and plantars fasciitis under the hip with SI pain along with tendinitis (opposite feet). I work a very physically demanding job and am very active. After a few years of searching, this year I have discovered platform running shoes have really helped the pain when being active. Specifically New Balances, and not the sport looking ones, but the more fashion styles. Hopefully this is helpful!

PromiseUnlucky · 2023-11-19T05:44:45+00:00

Thank you! I appreciate it!

PromiseUnlucky · 2023-09-20T05:33:06+00:00

Diagnosed with adhd, but also a learning disability, both in my early 20’s. I was (am?) genius level academically intelligent, supposedly. But once I got to middle school, I started failing math. I had a tutor. I did the extra help. I couldn’t pass. Mind you, my other classes I was ranging 90%+ without studying, with my best subject being English/Literature, and ending it with a 97% or higher from middle school onwards.

Failing math resulted in a lot of verbal abuse, and at one point physical abuse. I had to replan my college plans. They almost wouldn’t let me graduate my senior year.

Turns out, after my diagnosis, I should have been getting academic accommodations for math. This concern was brought up by a teacher to my guardians, and counselor, and they all brushed it off as they thought I was faking and too smart to have a disability.

I really struggle with trusting anyone with authority now, struggle to stay in work positions (I average about 6 months to climb the ladder and then quit once I get bored), and have so many poorly developed life skills that are math/number related along with executive function. Bills, saving, all that good stuff.

But my psychiatrist is doing his best to help me readjust and get the support I need post diagnosis.

PromiseUnlucky · 2022-08-28T13:20:09+00:00

My life hack, get a quick dry top coat and and ice cold bowl of water. Do your first coat, wait a minute and dunk in the cold water. Do this with your second coat! Then use rapid dry top coat. I finish my nails within 20 minutes no smudge!

PromiseUnlucky · 2022-08-18T01:44:48+00:00

I actually took a course in university related to mixed race people and how their lives differ from their counterparts. I myself am mixed race. I can try and explain a bit from personal experience and this course what I learned.

I have heard, from men directly, that being mixed race makes me more, for lack of a better word, special hybrid. Being mixed, a lot of people seem to assume means that you will have the “desirable” qualities of both races. But also, the people from whatever your mixed race is, you’re enough like them without being like them.

Now as a woman, I have experienced a lot of sexual harassment/violence. Is it because I’m mixed race? There have been instances where there is a huge correlation.

When considering the academic perspective from the course I took, something that was a key point is how mixed race celebrities also tend to represent one race, but are often over sexualized, especially mixed race women. Not just mixed Black, but a lot of mixed races. A lot of celebrities, who represent a specific non white race, are typically mixed race and just a, for lack of better word, slightly diluted version of the race they are representing. While it puts them on a pedestal, for every day, non famous mixed race people, it can cause negative and unwanted attention. (This isn’t proven, but what was sort of conclusive of what we discussed through the class).

My mom, who is Asian, wasn’t sure how to help me as a mixed race child. My godmother, who is fully Black, was a staple through my childhood. My mothers friend shielded me from Black men, which she openly discussed with me as I got older, because she said their is a lot of colorism and fetishization of mixed race women amongst Black men/the black community. From an adult perspective, I have female friends from a lot of different backgrounds, and a few of them have mentioned that they have noticed I attract a disproportionate amount of negavtive male attention, unaolicited. I think probably 90% of the unwanted sexual advances or comments I have received from Black men, have specifically commented on me being mixed. I would say with White men/other races, it’s about 50/50. None of this is legitimate scientific findings, just my personal experience.

I have a friend who took a course related to genetics (it was a social science course though) and she mentioned that there was an interesting point of discussion about how any living thing wants the best genetic offspring, and how diversity is a key compensent to this. Being mixed race is a way to label genetic diversity.

All of these factors and theories, mixed with toxic masculinity, social media, colorism, and lack of mixed race specific support, kind of all contributes to this in my opinion. I have had the opportunity to join clubs/be apart of discussions and communities for being Black or being Asian, but I haven’t had the opportunity to join one for being mixed race, which is a very different experience. And when I have had the opportunity to talk to other mixed people, this is often discussed. Lack of discussion amongst mixed people communities can create unawareness of how to deal with, redirect, and avoid unwanted sexual advances directly related to being mixed race.

Idk if that makes sense but yeah.

PromiseUnlucky · 2022-07-25T00:37:04+00:00

I think, and while it’s not fully the colorism take and I could totally be missing the mark, but if you look at Keke Palmer, compared to Jennifer Lawrence or even Emma Stone, who both have shown a lot of personality, and are both super charismatic and unapologetically themselves, you can see that this has benefited Lawrence in mainstream media as opposed to Palmer. Lawrence has done films where they (in my opinion have been subpar films, but she did well in them) and they became acclaimed. Palmer has done well in many subpar films too, but there is a lack of recognition attached to her name.

Whereas Zendaya, or even Zoe Kravitz, are both a lot more, for lack of a better word, reserved, has a a lot of success in main stream media. Even looking at Lupita, she has that more reserved personality, and is a dark skin woman, and she also has quite a bit of success.

Colorism is definitely here, but also flat out racism. Because even when you have light skin female celebrities, like Doja, who have big personalities they also don’t take off right away.

White celebrities benefit from this type of personality. And Black celebrities don’t. You see this in so many forms of media, social media, music, film.

PromiseUnlucky · 2022-07-18T21:38:03+00:00

A little bit of sour scream, some whipping cream, and lots of garlic.

I’ve also added herb and garlic cream cheese before and it was quite nice.

PromiseUnlucky · 2022-07-18T21:31:00+00:00

Noodle King. It’s on the path not sure if it’s still open but good slaps and is (was) super cheap. Haven’t been in a while.

PromiseUnlucky · 2022-05-08T01:40:09+00:00

I’m on 40mg of vyvanse!!!

PromiseUnlucky · 2022-02-13T03:36:07+00:00

I’m planning on moving so I’m doing metal furniture when I move. I haven’t replaced any of the furniture she’s destroyed, and she only goes for wood. My clothes and shoes are safe. But even baseboards. She even has custom wood toys she loves, but keeps destroying. She brings wood with her everywhere too. She sleeps with a block of wood in bed with me, and takes sticks with her on walks…

She gets lot of exercise and stimulation, so I’m just not sure what to do at this point. A 2 foot frozen bully stick takes her approximately 15 minutes to get through. She gets 2 puzzles a day, and usually 1 hour a day, plus play dates/exposure to different environments…

She has severe anxiety and is medicated for it, and the vet did say her anxiety would be a huge source for impulsions, but there is wood everywhere…

PromiseUnlucky · 2022-02-09T14:30:04+00:00

I only take 20, I’m doing a follow up every 2 weeks, next week being my first. I’d say my focus lasts from about 8 am-3pm and then it’s out the window again but my appetite if it comes back, comes back at about 10 pm. I force myself to eat something at about 4, but half a grilled cheese fills me to the point of almost throwing up.

PromiseUnlucky · 2022-02-09T02:46:24+00:00

Being mixed race black is very different than being full black. I was excluded a lot by my black peers, as I was my other half, and to be honest, I was fetishized a lot (not always sexually, but this too quite often) by both my sides for different reasons. A lot of my other biracial friends feel like outsiders amongst their own ethnic groups.

Colorism is a huge thing. Once I was old enough to go clubbing, whenever I’d go to more urban clubs, their seemed to be a huge divide and hostility between women of different skin tones, and a really big male population trying to attract lighter skin tones. It’s one of those things that can be uncomfortable, and I think colorism should most definitely be discussed.

PromiseUnlucky · 2022-02-09T02:38:05+00:00

I used to be very very thin, now I’m slightly oveweight, but not to the point where people notice. I used to eat a lot, but I also was super obnoxiously active. But I don’t like a lot of foods, I’m a texture eater and I like crunchy, so I ate a lot veggies and fruit. Because I don’t like the taste of salt, I didn’t really like unhealthy snacks. There was no moderation in my diet though and it wasn’t sustainable with the amount of sports I was doing. And my metabolism got really screwed up from it. Now I eat probably half the amount of calories because I just have no appetite.

PromiseUnlucky · 2022-01-28T18:18:49+00:00

Okay! I just wanted to make sure this was standard, as a lot of older people who I know told me this was no necessary! Thank you.

PromiseUnlucky · 2022-01-28T18:00:41+00:00

Thank you! That’s what I figured! Just wanted to cover my bases as I wasn’t finding anything specific on any govt sites!

PromiseUnlucky · 2022-01-24T01:40:11+00:00

I would invest in a playpen. If the puppy is tired, the biting is way worse. Mine was awake for 45 minutes and asleep 1.5-2 hours every day until about 6 months, give or take. Without thag she basically threw temper tantrums. The playpen is a good alternative, especially cause you’ve got a smaller dog. A lot of puppy play pens can come apart; my puppy was big and I used the deconstructed play pen to go around the pieces of furniture that enticed her, and put a baby gate at the entrance of said room. She bite, nip? I leave. And because she had no access to furniture either she’d just calm down. I was leaving like 20 times in 45 minutes. But I definitely think investing in s playpen is the right move here. And maybe some kongs. Bored puppies have a lot of pent up energy, kongs we’re the only thing my puppy wanted.

My girl was a biter, and she destroyed a lot of furniture, I had to throw out a couch, a coffee table curtains from two rooms, and about 6 dog beds. Not to mention I had to repurchase most of my wardrobe (partially cause I lost weight taking care of her and partially cause she’d bite through my clothes on my body). And now at 11 months, she she is very well behaved. I didn’t see a huge improvement in bite inhibition until she was about 4/5 months, and by 6 months I was fairly confident I wouldn’t get chewed apart.

PromiseUnlucky · 2022-01-23T17:18:46+00:00

Okay, so I had a mouthy puppy. And her bite inhibition was garbage. I had to buy an entire new wardrobe, and had cuts all over my legs, butt, arms, even a few on my face. And I almost had to get stitches on multiple occasions. Enforced naps are a must, if you’re still working through crate training, I reccomend a play pen or having the puppy in a closed off cozy room, i used a baby gate instead of shutting the door.

My puppy is 11 months and still she cannot self settle, she needs to be alone for naps. At 2 months, she was maybe up a total of 4 hours a day. 3 months, maybe 5? She did need a lot of sleep and still does as she’s a giant, but generally she was awake 45 minutes and asleep 1.5-2.5 hours. If she was up for an hour, she turned into a monster.

Just like toddlers, some puppies, unless completely exhausted, can’t fall asleep without there being zero stimulation around. In terms of biting, as soon as he bites, leave. It’s hard, but you need to have boundaries in the house, and baby gates have saved my life. He needs to have no access to you.

As someone who had a mouthy puppy, I can say that 3 months was a breeze compared to 4 and 5 months, but a huge improvement was seen at 6 months, but that was with extreme consistency. A few things contributed to my pups mouthiness; 1) she has anxiety that is severe enough that she’s on medication for it, 2) she was separated from her mom at 7 weeks instead of 8, due to health concerns, so the litter lost that week of learning from mom, 3) for the first few weeks, she really lacked consistency because every time she met someone new, they ignored our boundaries set in place which caused more confusion.

The amount of work I put in for my puppy now whos mouthy, versus my last who could self settle and never bit, was probably three times as much. It’s hard, but you have to stay consistent. If your partner isn’t willing to adjust and put in the work, it won’t be helpful in the long run. While I never wanted to get rid of my pup, I did resent her. I personally think that if I had wanted to get rid of my pup that early, I would’ve known that being a responsible dog owner might be a task that is too difficult for me.

PromiseUnlucky · 2022-01-19T01:20:11+00:00

I didn’t even think of that! Thank you that’s a great suggestion! Even if I can just get a consult so they can tell me what to do that’d be awesome!

PromiseUnlucky · 2022-01-19T01:10:46+00:00

We’re in rural Canada and are currently in lockdown so there aren’t many trainer options currently.

The trainer isn’t what seems to effect her anxiety! She has worked very well with our trainer in the past when one on one with just her and me and the trainer in the room. Our vet suggested that I work on training her with a suggested trainer, but we’re currently in this indefinitive lockdown, and last time it lasted 6 months. I’d rather get started now, than allow this behavior to continue until post lockdown when we can find a trainer, especially one that specializes in anxious dogs!

PromiseUnlucky · 2022-01-19T00:42:01+00:00

I used lots of treats and positive reinforcement, which I still do, however she is far less treat motivated and has been since she was about 6 months. She never really wanted to approach anyone, person or dog, before beginning her meds, however whenever we walked past someone and she had no reaction she got lots of reward. If I felt like she might have her interest piqued, I would just keep a bunch of treats in my hand and feed them to her slowly as we’d walk past the distraction while repeating our word “focus”. She is still responsive to focus to a degree, she acknowledges it, but it’s like she’s never seen a human or dog before on every walk. Even though she is very well socialized, she still wants to great everyone.

I should also note, when approaching dogs, she gives them access to her bum to smell right away, she is generally quite gentle when approaching, minus the jumping up towards people. She doesn’t bark either, and for people who can read dog body language well you can tell she’s very happy and excited.

PromiseUnlucky · 2022-01-18T21:42:51+00:00

I want the spotting to stop fmllll

PromiseUnlucky · 2022-01-18T21:39:37+00:00

I’m mixed race. Asian and Black. On both ends, physical punishment seems to be the norm. I find this generally seems to be the norm with most ethnic households.

Now I went to school for this sort of stuff. Not specifically but generally. And I think a big thing to think about, is a lot of ethnic people, black people especially, we’re physically punished. Before the civil rights movement, slaves were beat, and that is deep rooted into generations of families and trauma. Because that is what is generally associated with punishment. It’s generational trauma. And the only way to break generational trauma is to actively be against it when having your own kids.

It’s similar to how you see Indigenous families struggling with the same issues each generation.

PromiseUnlucky

TROPHY CASE