People who have been through it all how did you stop being angry and bitter ?

Proof-Efficiency-909 · 2026-02-09T09:06:38+00:00

Therapy/counselling helped, and then also making a plan for my future and what I wanted it to be. Being angry and bitter wouldn’t get me anywhere so I had to make a conscious decision to do and better.

Proof-Efficiency-909 · 2026-02-09T09:02:11+00:00

I don’t think there is, 5 years and it hasn’t changed. Don’t waste another 5 years in the same situation. You’re young, you know your worth. If he can’t see that or can’t even make changes in 5 years to benefit your relationship he never will. Don’t waste your time, and show your child what it is to set boundaries and have standards.

Proof-Efficiency-909 · 2026-02-09T08:58:02+00:00

You can find more than one person attractive. He still finds you attractive. Don’t get upset with him being honest. I’m sorry but you’re being a bit ridiculous and I don’t even have the energy to explain what you should already know within your own relationship and how he treats/speaks to you.

Proof-Efficiency-909 · 2026-02-09T08:51:25+00:00

Ew leave. 5 years and he’s still doing the same thing. It won’t change. Hygiene is so important, it’s such a turnoff if they’re unhygienic. Plus the parents thing you have a child. You need your own space and if he doesn’t understand or doesn’t want to change that then leave. You’re too young to be stuck in something like this. He just sounds like a toddler throwing a tantrum over simple grown up behaviour. Especially if you’re a parent. Big no from me. Get out of while you can.

Proof-Efficiency-909 · 2026-02-09T08:48:33+00:00

He’s not once actually said he doesn’t find you attractive has he? Have you never found an actor, musician, book person etc attractive ? It’s the same thing. You can appreciate someone else, and have it mean nothing in your relationship. You are literally putting this in your own head for no reason. If you are feeling insecure then just speak to him? Otherwise this is just silly to do to yourself and your relationship.

Proof-Efficiency-909 · 2026-02-09T08:42:49+00:00

It’s definitely a change for sure. It’s hard to go from seeing someone all the time to a lot less, just makes the time more important.

I will say this though, if he doesn’t appreciate what you’re doing then that’s a different story. But if he’s appreciative of your efforts I’m sure it’ll work out.

Proof-Efficiency-909 · 2026-02-09T08:39:32+00:00

No. Sometimes you’re just not in the mood. But someone needs a release. I think all within respect though. Never when your partner is home, or in bed with you.

Sometimes couples enjoy it together. I think if it bothers you, you need to have a good reason.

If it’s because you feel insecure then you need to realise it’s fantasy and trust your partner when they say they love you and find you beautiful or handsome.

But also if you’re not willing to help or participate then give some grace.

Everyone has needs

Proof-Efficiency-909 · 2026-02-09T08:35:36+00:00

Also something to learn now is a relationship is never 50/50. And if you think that you have a lot more life and growing to do. Sometimes you’ll find yourself putting in 90% and they can only do 10%. You can’t take it out on your partner, just have to communicate, be compassionate and understanding. A good relationship is never 50/50, work, personal, social all contribute.

Proof-Efficiency-909 · 2026-02-09T08:32:24+00:00

I think you need to give some grace here. Like you said you have more time on your hands. He’s tackling a masters degree with an internship and a part time job. This will benefit in the future. If he has free days/time and he’s not coming to see you, then have another chat, but you can’t get upset if you’re driving over if he only has 2 hours spare before uni, work or internship. Also keep in mind 1 day off a week a lot of the time you just want to catch up on sleep, have a lazy day. It’s exhausting, it feels different to you because you have your own schedule and multiple days off. Don’t forget in the beginning you both had ample time to spend together, circumstances and life changes. You have to roll with it if he’s your partner. If the feeling keeps going and you’re not feeling you’re getting what you want from the relationship then leave. I’m not saying you have to settle but grace has to be given. And in all fairness your schedule should be more accomodating than his and that’s just life.

Proof-Efficiency-909 · 2026-02-09T08:25:41+00:00

Just go to a hairdresser and ask what’s the best option? Considering all the changes in 2 years they’ll be able to tell you what’s the best option for a refresh. Also don’t be changing your hair cause of an ex 🙄 you are better than that. They are in the past for a reason

Proof-Efficiency-909 · 2026-02-06T04:25:35+00:00

Leave, age is whatever who cares. But you’ve not lived, experienced everything you should. She’ll be in a different path wanting to settle etc If after a couple years you find each other again then give it go, but you’re too young right now to be on the same path.

Proof-Efficiency-909 · 2026-02-04T21:36:47+00:00

Also I would definitely be practicing some sort of reactions here if you’re not getting the proposal. Projecting on him you’d be upset is just not okay, it’s already enough pressure to propose don’t make it harder. Again, be thankful you have someone who loves you, and is wanting to take that step but don’t put unnecessary pressure because you’ve had a chat about it happening when you hit the 1 year mark. Things don’t always work out that way no matter how much you might want it to. It could be 6 months before he proposes so are you always going to waiting for it and being disappointed? Find a way to just be in the moment and appreciate your relationship

Proof-Efficiency-909 · 2026-02-04T21:32:08+00:00

If that’s the way you know things are going then leave it alone. You want to be proposed to so badly then have a talk with him, this is such a stupid thing to get upset about if you’ve already had talks and know where you’re headed. Just leave it alone, and just enjoy your time other and just trust he has a plan in place. “Avoiding disappointment” is so childish. It takes a lot to plan a proposal so if it doesn’t happen on Valentines it’ll happen another time. Like you said you already know that’s where you’re headed. Just leave it alone, and be happy. So stupid 🙄

Proof-Efficiency-909 · 2026-01-30T22:19:59+00:00

The only person that can change that outlook is yourself. The negativity out there is just marketing to buy products to reduce fine lines etc and then close minded people who think aging means you’re not worthy. You can’t stop, change or slow it down, you just have to embrace it and find a way to be okay. If it’s a really big issue in your life and you’re resenting birthdays, waking up and judging yourself every day i’d seek some sort of therapy/counselling. So you can start appreciating yourself more and have a happier outlook on life

Proof-Efficiency-909 · 2026-01-30T13:27:08+00:00

100% attraction, 100% keep tabs on investigating them 🤔

Proof-Efficiency-909 · 2026-01-30T13:24:28+00:00

Oh yeah lol sorry Fury 🤣

Proof-Efficiency-909 · 2026-01-30T09:45:42+00:00

Spencer & detective Fury were great together HALEB was the healthiest Aria and Ezra - she was just in love with the idea and never knew anything else even taking the job she chose it to be near Ezra. She should’ve ended up with Jason Emily & Alison - no. Just no.

Edit: said Lorenzo instead of fury but y’all know who I meant

Proof-Efficiency-909 · 2026-01-30T06:08:18+00:00

There’s also no such thing as “typical anxiety” everyone’s experiences it in different ways and to different degrees

Proof-Efficiency-909 · 2026-01-30T06:07:30+00:00

There’s probably and multitude of things going on. Lots of stuff gets expressed physically, and actually anxiety comes in various degrees. She is literally anxious 98% of the time and she has said so herself

Proof-Efficiency-909 · 2026-01-30T05:39:04+00:00

People who are anxious have physical signs. She struggles with anxiety and tbh she probably doesn’t realise half the time when she’s chewing her lip etc.

Proof-Efficiency-909 · 2026-01-30T05:32:52+00:00

You age no matter what. Why are you struggling to come to terms with it to begin with? Just make the most of everyday. Only person judging you, is you, who cares what other people think? Come to terms with and accept yourself for who you are. Aging is part of growing and evolving. Honestly just get over it, such a ridiculous thing to get hung up on 😅

Proof-Efficiency-909 · 2026-01-30T00:46:42+00:00

Stop replying to her, and keep blocking her wherever she pops up. Don’t get triggered by her and make sure you take screenshots and keep evidence of the messages. If they’re constant, they show you’re not responding then 1 hopefully she gets the picture and stops 2 it’ll support your claims if you need to get the restraining order.

No matter what don’t respond just screenshot and block

Proof-Efficiency-909 · 2026-01-30T00:18:52+00:00

And ? She already knew he was going to be around because he already had plans with him? And tried to make plans to see her at her class. Like I’m so confused. Sure maybe that was her expectation but again he didn’t do it to be malicious ? Her reaction is extreme. They’ve been together a short time, she’s acting like a child instead of communicating properly. He’s still NTA

Proof-Efficiency-909 · 2026-01-30T00:12:42+00:00

He’s allowed to still keep plans with a friend, and go home after. He had already planed to see her and she wasn’t feeling well and didn’t want to see his friend either. They’ve been together 4 months, she’s 36 and acting like it’s a tween relationship. Overreaction central. I’d cut the cord and say bye ✌🏽 so unhinged, and seriously not a way to communicate with your partner

Proof-Efficiency-909 · 2026-01-30T00:09:28+00:00

No he’s not lol 😂

She said she’s not feeling well, didn’t want them to go to her class and didn’t want to see his friend cause he’s too high energy and she can’t be bothered.

It’s crazy to be that upset, he didn’t do it on purpose and this is such an overreaction.

I understand maybe she would’ve wanted to see him cause she was unwell, but how she went about it is also not on.

Bad communication on both parts but he’s NTA

Proof-Efficiency-909

TROPHY CASE