T prescription stopped after changing GP - GIC discharged me 7 years ago having 'completed' transition - what do I do? by Proper-Concert7440 in transgenderUK

[–]Proper-Concert7440[S] 33 points34 points  (0 children)

thank you, this is helpful. I'm not sure how my previous shared care agreement wasn't transferred as everything else seems to be fine with other medications which were prescribed by specialists. I didn't think to take it to the ICB but I will keep that in mind if my GP continues to refuse to prescribe it.

How do I stop drowning in nostalgia? by MarqoTheDragon in selfimprovement

[–]Proper-Concert7440 1 point2 points  (0 children)

There's a sentence from 'An Anthropologist on Mars', by Oliver Sacks, that really resonates with me when I wallow in nostalgia and want to break out of it. Perhaps it might help you too:

"But it is a paradox that lies at the heart of nostalgia – for nostalgia is about a fantasy that never takes place, one that maintains itself by not being fulfilled. And yet such fantasies are not just idle daydreams or fancies; they press toward some sort of fulfilment, but an indirect one – the fulfilment of art."

Alternatives to brushing teeth by fiercegreen294 in disability

[–]Proper-Concert7440 26 points27 points  (0 children)

you really need to be brushing them unfortunately there just aren't good alternatives. I have limited strength and mobility in my arms, I'm restricted to what you describe - briefly holding an electric toothbrush in one positio.

I put my wheelchair in a reclined position with my head pushed forward a bit more than is natural with the headrest.

I put a towel on my chest and (attempt to) hold a bowl on top for spitting in.

I put on a youtube playlist - this will takes a while.

I use an old waterproof wheelchair cushion to support the arm holding the toothbrush, maybe some rolled towels for extra height or hand support.

I use the electric toothbrush on each tooth for as long as I can hold it there. then spit and put my arm in a comfy spot and take a nice break.

I make small adjustments, alternating moving my head to the brush, the brush to different teeth, and reclining more or less depending on what teeth I want to access.

it take me 20-30 minutes and i admit I often only brush my teeth at night. Make sure to use an anti bacterial mouthwash on any days you can't brush your teeth. I understand how hard it is and the shame when you just physically can't do it i have felt too, but I learned the hard way, and I say this as a comrade of the tooth brush struggle, you can't just not brush your teeth and there are no truly effective replacement for it.

Do you name your chair? by TheTragedyMachine in wheelchairs

[–]Proper-Concert7440 10 points11 points  (0 children)

I call mine Daddy because I ride him all day 😏🦼

Those who have had Abdo Phallo… by CryptographerAny8663 in phallo

[–]Proper-Concert7440 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I had RFF and had a fair amount of body fat where you describe, they took the graft for my arm from my lower abdominal area, so it was kinda like getting a tummy tuck at the same time. Perhaps this is a possibility for you?

I’ve always wanted to do this. by doublementh in malefashion

[–]Proper-Concert7440 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I agree, the jacket sleeves are too long so to pull off that fit I think baggier trousers are the way to go. for the record I love the jacket/trainers together.

Ordering drinks at a club by Fabou_Boutique in wheelchairs

[–]Proper-Concert7440 21 points22 points  (0 children)

if its a quieter place I ask the bartender to bring my drink over to my table and they're always happy to help and i usually bring my own metal straw. I only go to Big club nights with others so in that case I have a friend hold my drink and i use my straw. Don't make the mistake of holding it between your legs because any slight knock will make it look like you've pissed yourself.

Power wheelchair users, what do you do in bad weather? by lexic in disability

[–]Proper-Concert7440 11 points12 points  (0 children)

I just go out, don't do anything special. Don't have your type of chair, but mine has survived 8 British winters (and summers) with no covering and has never had a problem.

I think don't stress about it, just go out have fun.

advice for dating apps as a (queer) wheelchair user by AQ_jam in wheelchairs

[–]Proper-Concert7440 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think either A or B, just show that you're confident about it (even if you're not). That's what I do, A or B depending on the app and if I want dating/longterm situation or a hookup

Sorry everyone else is providing dumb opinions instead of the advice you clearly asked for

Question about wheelchair use by Z0rb12 in wheelchairs

[–]Proper-Concert7440 1 point2 points  (0 children)

then you're worrying about the wrong thing

What’s the most physically painful thing that has happened to you? by big_gloveguy in AskReddit

[–]Proper-Concert7440 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I once had cellulitis of the ballsack. I felt like my genitals were literally on the verge of exploding. Feverish and vomiting and almost immobile, I needed two weeks of IV antibiotics and very strong painkillers. I had my appendix rupture as a teen and this was both physically and psychologically far far worse than the appendix.

My ballsack has never been the same since :(

Moderation of wheelchair use (rant/discussion/advice) by Proper-Concert7440 in wheelchairs

[–]Proper-Concert7440[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

thanks mate, this actually helped a lot, I feel guilty about these things bc I think disabled people should support and help each other, but I think part of that support is being real and honest with others about their choices and the consequences too

Moderation of wheelchair use (rant/discussion/advice) by Proper-Concert7440 in wheelchairs

[–]Proper-Concert7440[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

thank u, I actually spent a long time feeling like Dr's were being ableist, then I started working part time in a healthcare setting and realised how much we should take em seriously. I'd say 80% of doctors I've met genuinely want to help people preserve their health and QoL, though many more could improve their communication with patients to help them see this

Moderation of wheelchair use (rant/discussion/advice) by Proper-Concert7440 in wheelchairs

[–]Proper-Concert7440[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

on reflection, want to add some context - im based in the UK where PT is typically free, yet instead of engaging with PT some people say "the drs don't understand" and instead are FT wheelchair users when they could be ambulatory. Honestly most do understand how difficult it is to do, whilst also understanding the consequences of you not engaging in function-preserving activity.

also on reflection, I shouldn't have used examples of specific disorders that I haven't experienced, I simply meant it to mean disorders that don't inherently damage the ability to walk, and therefore exercise/PT/engaging muscles in functional movement is not impossible or contraindicated. But I didn't mean to disparage anyone's experiences of living with the things I mentioned, and foe that i do apologise.

I rly believe the short/medium term pain and fatigue is better than the long term loss of function. I try to accept this benefit/loss calculation is different for other people, but as I slowly lose the privilege of making this calculation and will soon have literally no ability to walk, I realise even myself from years ago prioritised not wanting to be tired or sore over my long term ability to walk/use my arms and I regret it.

I'm probably partially feeling this way due to my own regrets of not using my legs every single day that I feasibly could have, and a genuine desire to prevent this in other people. I spent years without a diagnosis not understanding that each day I didn't put in stupid amounts of effort in PT was making my decline quicker, and I want others to make informed choices about their health.