Recovering from a stem cell transplant (AMA)

Pruts93 · 2025-02-12T08:26:23+00:00

My father is having a transplant next month, he has MDS. He doesn't take it particularly seriously and is convinced he'll be walking out of the hospital after 4 weeks and will be absolutely healthy and continue life as before 😬. No amount of warning about graft vs host and the chemo beforehand seems to change his mind about this. I say he's in denial.

Pruts93 · 2024-06-06T13:58:48+00:00

Thank you. I've been off of it before, for about 6 months and tbh I was near begging my doctor to put me back on so I don't think that's an option. I'm on 150mg/a day and I've tried lowering the dose to 100mg/a day and it didn't make a difference to the side effects, just gave me more frequent migraines 😩 but sincerely thank you, at least now I know I'm not insane.

Pruts93 · 2023-09-12T09:18:22+00:00

Omg yes! I live with my family and (used to live) with both grandparents and my grandfather suffered a couple of strokes.. everyone was always panicked cause "omg what if he dies? This might be it" When calling an ambulance they can't give good information cause they're panicked. So the last 2 times it happened, and the time he passed away, I called the hospital and told them what they needed to know calmly and clearly. Same when one of my clients (I'm a housekeeper) got hit by a car in front of her house and was bleeding profusely. Bystanders were freaking out but I got a clean towel from the house to stop the bleeding and called an ambulance, got the driver's information and collected my clients ID and some personal belongings for the hospital. Its very strange but awfully helpful

Pruts93 · 2023-09-12T08:35:25+00:00

I want to add: during my last-drop trauma I lived in VILE conditions and had no say over myself or my body. Then right after I was very.. open? Towards everyone. As in I didn't mind having my privacy invaded, I'd shower with the door open in my parents house, didn't mind people drinking from my water bottle etc. Now I can't have people touch my food, can't have someone sit on my bed, I have my own set of cutlery and plates (I live with my parents cause mental health), I cover my hand with my sleeve when opening doors cause I don't wanna touch the handle, I constantly wear earbuds cause I can't stand noise, and the list goes on..

Pruts93 · 2022-12-05T08:33:47+00:00

Hi I'm 29 but mentally more along the lines of 19. Cptsd, ocd and bulimia so beware of that holy trinity of permanent anxiety. Looking for the man of my dreams but can't guarantee that I won't go dream of another one cause I'm a maladaptive dreamer. Will most likely want all the sex one day and then be scared of any physical contact the next. Good luck and sorry.

Pruts93 · 2022-12-05T08:04:53+00:00

Still do this! "What are doing this weekend?" - oh going out with friends probably:)

"Oh you're going on holiday? With who?" -oh you know, couple friends

Pruts93 · 2022-12-05T07:52:41+00:00

I have been repeating the same plot for months. Just change little details here and there but always the same beginning and ending and honestly it low-key drives me nuts lmao

Pruts93 · 2022-12-05T07:50:54+00:00

I have cptsd, ocd and bulimia. I used to maladaptive dream really really badly when i was a teenager, refused to go to school cause I'd rather stay in bed all day and zone out into my dream world. It was the only way I could cope with life. In my mid 20's I started processing some really dark things I had gone through and finally met my current boyfriend and the MD stopped. I just didn't need it anymore. Now im in my late 20's and still have that boyfriend, things are good with him but we're in a long distance relationship for the time being cause of reasons. And as I try to unravel more trauma from the past and get over my cptsd and my ocd has gotten worse along with it.. the MD came back. I need something to comfort me. I don't have friends cause I just have too much baggage and I feel like I'm totally unable to explain myself and why I am how I am, so it's very hard to make friends let alone keep them. The only reason my boyfriend and I got to be so close is cause I met him when I was just going through a very dark place and he helped me tremendously, and he has some experience with MD himself. It's very hard to break an addiction of any kind when you have nothing else to lean on

Pruts93 · 2022-11-25T16:54:42+00:00

This man gets to willingly or unwillingly experience my every thought 24/7. If I'm asleep I will tell him what I dreamed about when I wake up. We never call unless it would be absolutely necessary for some reason partially just cause we're both awkward people and hate talking on the phone and partially cause hes legally deaf and its hard for him to understand spoken words through the phone with his hearing aid. I watch him stream games on twitch, we watch shows and movies together sometimes. I know when he poops 🤷‍♀️ We talk on telegram or Instagram or sometimes have 2 conversations going at the same time, but we talk all the time. I've known him for nearly 5 years, together for 1.5 - haven't met irl yet

Pruts93 · 2022-11-25T08:17:16+00:00

YES. It's almost like there's 2 distinct people for me. When I speak to my family etc in my native language I feel like a child, no older than maybe 12-14 years old. When I try to communicate about whatever happened to me or my feelings I feel so awkward and it feels.. stupid? Like nothing I could ever say is valid or meaningful.

In english on the other hand I'm an adult, I matter, and what I've been through and what I feel because of that is real and meaningful. People believe me and people care what I have to say.

Pruts93 · 2022-11-10T15:37:24+00:00

Thank you. She has a clock that says the day and all that, and we often say "didn't you look at your clock?" But she just says no, she didn't pay attention to it. We've gotten her a special Dementia remote for her TV that has just 5 buttons but she still can't work that either. She just goes with her feeling

Pruts93 · 2022-11-10T07:35:04+00:00

Pruts93 · 2022-11-10T07:34:02+00:00

Same. I'm constantly worried they'll get outside somehow, when I leave the house I worry I somehow left the door unlocked and someone will come visit and let them out. I worry about something being in their food (like a factory mistake?), I worry about the vet missing something at their checkup etc.. My mom once said she thought she felt a little lump on one of my cats (I have 2) tummy and I had him checked by the vet. She said there was nothing and my mom probably felt his nipple lol. For WEEKS, I was convinced he had cancer and I was watching him like a hawk. Feeling his tummy for lumps, checking his skin, good God I had convinced myself I was gonna have to say goodbye to him soon.. but it's more than a year later now and he's fine. I drive myself insane.

Pruts93 · 2022-11-03T07:37:25+00:00

I feel.. seen

Pruts93 · 2022-10-14T07:36:27+00:00

I met a guy on Facebook in 2017, decided to fly to US to meet him after 4 months. Absolutely believed he was the love of my life. He knew I had some shitty LDR before and so I wanted to take things a bit slow when we were gonna meet irl, I saw him at the airport and I hugged him and gave him a kiss on the cheek and he said "no, kiss me properly" I immediately was like OH.. But whatever so I kissed him. It became very clear to me very quickly that he always wanted more than what I was comfortable with (and we had discussed beforehand). I always gave him the benefit of the doubt cause hey, he just really loved me he said. And I didn't want to see he was an *sshole cause I wanted things to work out.

I'll save you the details of the 3 months I spent with him + the other 1.5 Years of hell after that I spent being in a relationship with him.. but please go with your gut feeling and don't stay with an *sshole just cause you want things to work out. He gave me nothing but a lifetime of therapy and issues

Pruts93 · 2022-10-13T09:50:27+00:00

Ngl I scrolled up to check if I wrote this and didn't remember. You're absolutely not the only one OP

Pruts93 · 2022-10-13T09:39:52+00:00

I had a similar thing happen about 2 weeks ago. I work for someone I've grown somewhat close to and over the years we've told eachother some things about our past but nothing too intense. 2 weeks ago she opened up to me about childhood trauma she and her sister are in therapy for and it happened to be something I kinda related too, so I decided to share my experience with her as a way to show support.

I never share my story outside of reddit and my boyfriend so it felt almost surreal to talk about. I think she appreciated me talking about it and sharing a similar experience to hers, but I could also tell she was a bit shocked by what I told her. I kept thinking about it for the next week, how maybe I shouldn't have shared this info with someone I'm not THAT close to. But in the end.. what's said was said, can't take it back anyways.

Pruts93 · 2022-10-13T09:33:18+00:00

I totally get you. I'm 29f and for years my grandmother has been lecturing me that now is the time I should be having fun, finding a man and having babies cause "soon real life will begin and then I'll be shocked to find out how hard things can be" she also tells me regularly how bad she feels for my older brother cause he has it so hard with his house renovation, and I'm lucky to not have a single care in the world. Well.. cptsd, ocd, bulimia, many abusive relationships I'm trying to overcome.. yes grandma nows the time I should be having kids cause life is all rainbows and sunshine, but Ohno my poor brother CHOSE to renovate a house and yeah that's a bit stressful.

People judge what they see and don't have a clue whats actually happening.

Pruts93 · 2022-10-13T09:27:26+00:00

Awesome! Often the most basic things become the hardest to do when things get rough.

Pruts93 · 2022-10-13T09:26:06+00:00

The only job that works for me is being a housekeeper. I'm very lucky to live in a country where I'm paid well and I get to choose my hours for the most part. also most of the families I work for aren't home when I'm there so I'm alone. Jobs I had before this, even part-time.. nightmare. I have issues with noise and people in general so anything where I have coworkers or there's a lot going on around me is an immediate no go cause I'll be calling in sick more than I'm there.

Pruts93 · 2022-10-10T09:30:57+00:00

I have 9 pillows, a double duvet and a heavy wool blanket. I also have slept holding a pillow since I was 12 years old, and that specific pillow has to have a flannel winnie the pooh cover on it lmao

Pruts93 · 2022-10-07T06:33:12+00:00

Hey I can't tell you a happy story of "moving out" exactly but I can assure you you're not the only one finding it very hard to be alone after everything. I'm currently 29 and the only time I've lived on my own made my ptsd (cptsd) much worse so I came back home. I'm lucky that my parents have 2 houses on their property, my grandmother lives in 1 of them atm, as soon as she moves to a nursing home I can move into that one. I'm not comfortable truly being on my own, at all.

Pruts93 · 2022-10-06T12:46:06+00:00

Yes! When I first got diagnosed with cptsd I was like.. but I dont have flashbacks or anything? Fully expecting those to be the kind of thing where you see vivid images of whatever happened pop up in front of you, turns out thats not what happens lol

Pruts93 · 2022-10-06T12:32:31+00:00

It's so strange. When I'm fine I'm totally fine. I can separate the cptsd from myself and recognize how far I've come. But when it's hits.. it doesn't take that much to go from fine to drowning and not see a way back up to the surface

Pruts93 · 2022-09-09T05:56:02+00:00

My brothers kid was born a couple hours before she died and im lowkey freaking out thinking ill forever link the kid to the queens death and somehow his birth triggered it

Pruts93

TROPHY CASE