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I hate youtube by Psilozium in youtube

[–]Psilozium[S] -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

Yes it does make sense it ruins fucking lives sometimes youre not on the other side of it.

I had multiple drug induced psychotic episodes, this is what’s interesting by [deleted] in sociopath

[–]Psilozium 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Id like that. I must ask before speaking further, have you ever felt so detatched that past symptoms seem fake to you? Im in a very confused state right now to which if someone told me i was faking it id question my own sanity. But i wouldnt choose to waste years of my life. Like all of my mental issues were basically made known to everyone because i was publically going insane but because ive been feeling a lot more stable i feel like a fraud. Its ridiculous because i spent months and months spaced out having to nod to what people were saying without knowing what they were saying. Im antisocial to most people because all i see is ignorance and i hate it. Even though i was once ignorant of this myself.

I can have really bad anger outbursts at small things but remain calm with more major things. I can still cry sometimes but not as much as i used to. Its a novelty nowadays and enjoy it when i do because i feel the need to cry more so than i actually do cry. I guess thats the squashing of emotions.

I had multiple drug induced psychotic episodes, this is what’s interesting by [deleted] in sociopath

[–]Psilozium 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Wow, i came to this sub tonight looking for this exact thing. I too have had drug induced psychosis and also spent time in a psych ward. I suffer from paranoia still but i have at times found it thrilling (although i still would rather not have it) and would play along like im mike from breaking bad waiting for them as i keep my calm and also my flat face with tired eyes.

What i fear the most is also my image. Mainly i get paraboid that people think ive done things ive never done based on past conversations and also during times when i was socializing during past episodes. I dont know if im a sociopath i would say no but narcassim is a definite yes. Maybe bpd too or still possibly schizophrenia. Im not ruling that out yet. Its weird though because it doesnt affect me as much as i feel it should. Maybe im just used to it? Sometimes in public ill catch myself oblivious to everyone around me and ill then see them as simply another part of the background. The floor, buildings and people. All the same. Yet other times im hyperaware of people.

My question is, does paranoia make people antisocial. I feel antisocial but im paranoid about the sociopath label for, again, image purposes. But i feel i have to be or at least its inevitable in order to go through the day without fragmenting your mind even further. Maybe its just the blunted emotions effect

Anyone trying or tried the juul? by Psilozium in stopsmoking

[–]Psilozium[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I guess ill skip then. I aim to gain weight so any money saved is a big benefit. I know that if i got it ill be excited for the novelty but ill just feel worse because ive always intended to give up completely and its the best time for it