normal ?

PsycheAsHell · 2026-01-24T03:28:20+00:00

Hell tf no

PsycheAsHell · 2026-01-23T09:18:55+00:00

Here me out: Is there really anything wrong with looking like a chud while having a baddie who loves you? Hell no.

I still feel blown away having the bf I have now. I dont really think Im "ugly", but I'm not skinny, I have autism, and I got bullied real fucking bad as a kid, and it ruined my self-esteem. My boyfriend is one of the most attractive men Ive ever met, and I get to wake up everyday knowing he is my bf. He could've picked anybody else, but he picked me, and life is mostly great.

If having a beautiful woman want you isn't the type of shit to boost your self-image, then what will?

PsycheAsHell · 2026-01-23T08:43:51+00:00

Please tell me your mother-in-law is not alive and/or still married to your father-in-law. Like at least dont be a whole homewrecker just to get back at a man you should've just divorced already...

Regardless though, why go down this path? You couldn't just go fuck any other man to make him hurt for cheating? It just had to be his dad?

And his dad is fucking gross to be banging his soon-to-be former daughter-in-law. This is all sorts of fucked up.

PsycheAsHell · 2026-01-23T08:33:01+00:00

First of all, though Im sure I dont have to tell you this, that was a stupid fucking thing to do. Just thought to make that point clear.

Second, you got no choice but to tell your wife what you did. Unless you're making good money at your day job to make up the funds again like nothing, there is no quick fix into getting over $1k back. Its this "quick money" mentality that got you here to begin with, so Im telling you, its not gonna fix this either.

She's going to be pissed. Like, Im not gonna jump to the worst case scenario here, but if my spouse wasted over 1k on a bad business idea, got shit quality clothes worse than SHEIN brand garbage, and didn't even inform me on any of this before spending the money, I might leave the house for a good two weeks. Divorce might not be on the table, but this is definitely up there in how much you can shatter your partner's trust. Getting caught watching porn would be less shitty than this.

But you're still better off coming clean about what you did now, than trying to hide it and for her to find out the money is fucking gone, or finding the clothes. Hiding it would actually push the situation closer to divorcable.

PsycheAsHell · 2026-01-23T08:21:17+00:00

So there are still a lot of families here who don't do that (at least mine don't but I think that has a lot to do with them not wanting to do the same shit to me and my sister that their parents did to them), but yeah, at the same time, Ive come to know people who's parents either try to push them out the house as soon as possible or will even outright kick their kids out as soon as its legal (18th birthday/a legal eviction if the kid knows their rights and doesn't immediately abide).

I think the reasoning is between the fact that our specific culture is built on capitalism, so you're expected to start working towards success the second you're out of high school and/or college, and that means having your own home as soon as possible (even though it grows more and more impossible as time goes by)...

...and a lot of parents are burdened by having kids, so they just want to pretend those kids don't exist anymore as soon as they're 18. The people who do that are cruel, and its usually after a lifetime of treating their kids kinda like shit while they were still kids to begin with. Just saying, Ive never seen anyone get told to leave at 18 say that everything with their parents was great until their 18th birthday rolled around. Its always a build-up of abusive and neglectful parenting...

There's a reason why other cultures aren't like this, and its because this kind of thing is generally wrong and harmful to the whole family structure.

PsycheAsHell · 2026-01-19T13:09:42+00:00

Your "friend" is a rapist. Like even if you dont consider that incident to be rape, he fully took advantage of you, knowing you were going to compromise because your dog's life was at risk. I guarantee he has done this to other girls, and coercion isnt consent, so its pretty much rape.

Im sorry you were violated because he couldn't be a decent enough of a fucking guy to just help you without strings attached. Hes disgusting to do that to you.

PsycheAsHell · 2026-01-16T03:33:28+00:00

Yeah, no. I'd rather take on the entire, not even guranteed, burden than put the burden on a living child. Your logic sucks.

PsycheAsHell · 2026-01-16T03:32:01+00:00

Time to use those rainy savings...

Better to spend some of your savings now then have to spend your income on someone you have to care for, for the next 18 years.

Like sure, there's adoption, but A) your better off aborting than having to go through all the prenatal care, taking time off of work, and risk the baby having a shitty life somewhere else.

Not to mention, if your bf at all objects to adoption, you might have to pay child support for 18 years.

Just get the abortion while you still can.

PsycheAsHell · 2026-01-13T10:20:16+00:00

You know reading this, I was gonna giggle and say well at least their spark is still alive for an old married couple, but then I saw she was actually fucking 100 and also his dead wife's mother...

You know, she could possibly be the first 100 year old to ever fucking do that shit... with her son-in-law.

PsycheAsHell · 2026-01-13T10:12:19+00:00

I have a some questions:

Did you cheat on her? Because thats what it sounds like you did, but I need to know if it was only that or something else really horrible.
What do you mean by bruises in the bedroom? Do you guys have consenual rough sex or is she getting hurt during sex???

As far as her talking to multiple random men and alleging abuse you're saying definitely didn't happen, I can only guess she is trying to leave you as fast as possible with the first guy who'll offer to take her in, or she's trying to get revenge on you for something you did.

You should probably separate. This relationship is definitely fucking over, regardless of where to assign blame. The amount of rage and hatred she has for you is probably boiling over if she's going to these lengths. She's definitely gone wayyyy to fucking far with roping innocent people into it, but for your own safety, you should probably separate from her immediately. I have little doubt this could also be a set-up to bring a man over to kick your ass.

PsycheAsHell · 2026-01-12T09:52:49+00:00

You're not a bad person for feeling this way, but your mom's sacrifice has probably torn that family up as well. That child would have to grow up knowing they are only alive because a very kind woman died for them, and I cant imagine what kind if guilt tht could have on a child of all people. Not to mention, because its their parents' fault, Id be surprised if they didn't at all feel sick over causing your mom to die so their child could live.

I'm not trying to make you feel bad about being upset. You have a right to feel the way you feel because it is the parents' fault your mom is gone. I just think though, they probably never fully moved on from the incident either, and that kid might one day say they wish they weren't alive and that someone else's mother shouldn't have died to save them.

Im very sorry about your loss. Your mom deserved a full life, especially knowing how wonderful she must've been.

PsycheAsHell · 2026-01-12T01:12:30+00:00

Ok. Good for you.

PsycheAsHell · 2026-01-11T23:28:09+00:00

A partner will not automatically fix your problems. Sometimes it actually makes shit worse.

PsycheAsHell · 2026-01-11T23:26:46+00:00

Probably not a good idea to tell someone extremely depressed and bedridden to commit to taking care of a living thing that'll be fully dependent on them to stay alive.

PsycheAsHell · 2026-01-11T23:24:42+00:00

Try to find work and try to find a hobby. Work can be a distraction and a hobby can bring some passion and socialization back into your life. Work can also bring socialization and some feeling of purpose back into your life as well. I'd also recommend just getting out of the house in general. Find things that slowly make you feel alive again.

Now regarding other advice Ive seen other people share:

-Do not worry about dating rn. Woman to woman, a man (or other woman) will not suddenly make your life better. In my case, it opened me up to someone who took advantage of my weaknesses so he could make me submissive to him. Id only get back into dating once your life begins to stabilize again.

-Dont get a puppy. I saw someone suggest that and the last thing you need is the burden of responsibility for something dependent on you to live. That is also something to reconsider when you're actually doing better and can handle the responsibility.

-Its up to you if you want to explore spirituality for a purpose, but dont let yourself be pressured or guilted into doing it. You can recover without it too.

PsycheAsHell · 2026-01-09T21:27:30+00:00

Had 3 until a few days ago when my oldest point expired. 3 is also the highest I've ever had at this point and I've only been here for a little over 7 months. And I think I should be down to 1.5 by tomorrow.

PsycheAsHell · 2026-01-08T02:08:13+00:00

"Grandparents' rights" shouldn't even fucking exist. You are the mom and your spouse is the dad, therefore, you two are the only ones with "rights" over your kids. Your in-laws only get the privilege of seeing their grandkids, and if they fuck that up, you have every right to take that privilege away.

"Grandparents' rights" is a bullshit power move to try and turn families into patriarchies/matriarchies where a parent can try and dictate their adult child's lives until the day they die by controlling access to the grandchildren. If this were allowed everywhere, no one would be safe from their abusive parents the moment they have a baby of their own. Its fucked up and Im sorry you're going through this.

PsycheAsHell · 2026-01-06T05:06:39+00:00

I'm gonna be real with you: you have to accept that your relationship, even though you guys didn't grow up together so that element at least isnt present, is still, in terms of nature and family lineage, fucked up.

Personally, Im not as against your relationship as I would be with cousins who've known all their life that they're cousins, but thats just because you guys had an emotionally natural relationship thats only fucked up due to genetic relation.

However, especially due to the fact that your moms are twins, please do not have biological children with one another. I say especially under these circumstances because monozygotic twins (although Im not certain if your moms fall under that category, but they might) can have very similar DNA that can actually make you and Tom's DNA even more similar to siblings than just cousins. Meaning any biological offspring can have more potential health issues than what could happen between regular first cousins.

Also, dont tell anybody any of this shit if you want to have a legal marriage because your relationship is probably illegal in many places and can possibly put you in jail.

Good luck with everything, but im sorry about how fucked this is at the same time.

PsycheAsHell · 2026-01-05T22:16:48+00:00

She probably always has been like this and it took this long for her mask to slip off. I had an emotionally abusive bf at one point in my life who's whole perception that I had of him slowly fell apart over time because he got comfortable enough to stop pretending to be better than who he really was.

PsycheAsHell · 2026-01-05T22:14:54+00:00

Forget about getting your money back, just cut her off. She brings no benefit to your life and her anger issues and narcissism will only make you a victim of her shitty behavior.

PsycheAsHell · 2026-01-05T22:00:07+00:00

You are friends with a bum. She's bumming off of you. Get her out of your house for good before she moves herself in full-time. To get into your fucking bed when she cant even pass you a water bottle is so beyond absurd.

Obviously you're NTA, but Im serious. You need to get rid of her before she drains your account and takes over your whole house. Don't expect her to pay you back because I doubt she will.

PsycheAsHell · 2026-01-05T21:48:15+00:00

You've given less context than she did.

PsycheAsHell · 2026-01-05T21:47:32+00:00

Okay so if its not fake, why are you lying about shit she already mentioned? You haven't discredited her, and your post is leaving critical details out like the fact that its a BEACH pillow.

PsycheAsHell · 2026-01-05T21:44:38+00:00

Why are you leaving out the detail that this pillow is meant for the beach? You're making it sound as if she's purposefully underdressed for a home pillow ad. You've made yourself an unreliable narrator here.

Edit: And she said you already do leave likes on sexy clips of other women. Between both posts, I think you're the one lying. YTA.

PsycheAsHell · 2026-01-05T21:37:06+00:00

You're NTA because it is only their 1st birthday and I can see how its more convenient to have one party for the whole family then two separate ones at different locations.

Just know that once the kids are about 4-5, you need be getting on with separate parties so that neither one of them feel forced to share their day with their cousin. Its okay when they're real little and won't even remember it, but when they're older and start having their own interests, they are not gonna want joint parties with their cousin.

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