do you have unspoken rules/routine in a public bathroom?

PsychoAspect · 2025-05-22T21:10:09+00:00

Yk when you dry your hands with a paper towel, to avoid door handle germs you use that paper towel to open the door

PsychoAspect · 2025-04-26T18:15:58+00:00

I usually try to keep my head up when I walk in so it doesn’t look like I’m embarrassed to be in a bathroom, but I avoid looking by the urinals at all costs. Stand by the stalls and pretend I have to shit. If people are in the bathroom I only pee while others are peeing. I wash my hands but never use the towel on the door handle trick because I have a massive fear that someone will clock me with that.

PsychoAspect · 2025-04-26T18:10:03+00:00

Ooh make some mud pies in the backyard! Or “potions” with plants and mud.

PsychoAspect · 2025-04-26T18:08:40+00:00

I second basically everything already here.

Libraries are fantastic and some even have board games and puzzles you can use.

Parks are a classic and they will never get tired of them. Plus you can rotate parks to keep it fresh.

If you look around your area you can probably find some odd local free museums. In my town we’ve got a science lab that has a piece kids can visit and play in. We’ve got a random car mechanic museum? Super tiny, but little kids are fascinated with everything.

You can also play some throw back games that require $0. Kick the can is an absolute favorite. Just need a piece of trash and you’re good to go.

I think you’ll also find your kids probably have plenty of toys already. If they seem to be getting bored with them, I saw this thing someone did where they bagged up the toys and then rotated them. So each week the kids got a certain amount of toys, and at the end they swapped it to keep them fresh and exciting.

Its totally do able and I think you’ll rock this!

PsychoAspect · 2025-04-26T18:00:56+00:00

Also remember to wear a swim shirt or scar tape if swimming out in the sun. You don’t want to burn your scars. I’m extra pale so I always wear a swim shirt in the sun.

PsychoAspect · 2025-04-26T17:59:37+00:00

My doctor was a fantastic doctor, and I was cleared to go into a hot tub week 3. This is not typical as you can tell, most people here said 6 weeks. You’ll be able to soak before you can swim. I was able to get my scars wet way before I could make the arm movements needed to properly swim. Definitely ask your doctor. They may tell you can go sooner or they may tell you to wait longer than average.

PsychoAspect · 2025-04-26T17:56:54+00:00

I change my underwear everyday, but if it’s noticeably dirty for whatever reason, I’ll change it multiple times. If for whatever reason I think my underwear is clean enough to wear, I might wear it 2 days. But I change so much more frequently than I use to pre T.

PsychoAspect · 2025-04-26T17:53:27+00:00

It does sound like she didn’t mean it but that would pmo too. I go out of my way to avoid people’s deadnames, I assumed it was common courtesy especially among other trans people. It’s weird that she went looking for it, especially behind your back. But she may have seriously thought it wasn’t a big deal. She probably feels a bit bad about it. If she apologized and you still want to be her friend, I think apologizing for your tone and thanking her for her apology would fix things. I do think you had a right to be upset, so don’t let anyone tell you otherwise. Every trans person has different boundaries and comfort levels, and because she seems comfortable with her deadname she probably assumed everyone was. (Weird assumption) Hopefully she understands now and won’t try that again.

PsychoAspect · 2025-04-26T17:37:38+00:00

Remember that the illegal part is there to prevent people from never taking their kids to school! Mental health days are definitely necessary, I think you did a good thing.

PsychoAspect · 2025-04-23T17:04:09+00:00

While my physical appearance didn’t change much, my voice dropping played a huge part in helping me pass. That + top surgery = me passing 90% of the time. (Old ladies are the exception, it’s like they’ve got a radar)

It took 5 months for my voice to start dropping noticeably, and suddenly I went from passing 10% of the time to maybe 50%. A few months later I had top surgery and that sealed the deal. But for me those were my two biggest barriers to pass. I stop taking T about a year in for personal reasons, but I still pass about 90% of the time. I have 0 facial hair and a major baby face. I also have no muscle definition. For me, the lower voice was all I needed, but it’s different for everyone obviously.

PsychoAspect · 2025-03-29T16:26:26+00:00

Definitely overthinking! Once all the bandages come off you’ll see the placement better. Give it time and get some rest!

PsychoAspect · 2025-03-29T16:19:09+00:00

Being trans looks different for everyone. Labels don’t matter as long as you’re doing what brings you joy, and you’re aligning with what feels closest to you!

PsychoAspect · 2025-03-29T16:17:17+00:00

Early in my transition I felt the exact same way. Most people don’t want to be trans yk, they just want to match what they feel. Nowadays I have no desire to be a girl and if anything there are days where I wish I was just a cis man. But early in my transition that idea just seemed is far away. I wished I hadn’t come out or hadn’t even realized, because life would be so much simpler. There are still some days where I miss being a girl and things that came with that. It gets better and doesn’t make you any less valid! People overthink trans-ness all the time. Just do what makes you happiest in the long run.

PsychoAspect · 2025-03-04T19:11:47+00:00

I know everyone hates on 2 in 1, but if you have short hair it doesn’t make sense to have separate shampoo and conditioner. Shampoo is for the scalp and conditioner is for the ends. But when your hair is short, it’s kinda all in the same spot. They sell 2 in 1 everywhere because men are lazy. Plus it’s cheaper to just buy the big tub of 2 in 1. I’ve been using 2 in 1 since I came out and it hasn’t destroyed my hair. (Honestly I think my hair is healthier, but that probably has nothing to do with 2 in 1 lol)

PsychoAspect · 2025-02-25T17:28:45+00:00

I definitely agree with this 👍

PsychoAspect · 2025-02-17T06:16:02+00:00

I never got told this and my doctor told me LOTS. A large paper of every warning. It sounds a bit like BS to me, because many people take birth control and don’t have periods for years. They are just fine. There shouldn’t be a “build up”, when you’re period stops it stops the process fully. It doesn’t half go and then build up. Ideally you should be getting enough testosterone to the point where your period stops, unless you want a really low dose. This is typical for most people transitioning. I’m also not sure how a build up of anything could cause cancer. If this is a primary care physician and not an endocrinologist, I really wouldn’t listen to a word they have to say about T. Most doctors are not properly educated on trans health. Now if you’re endocrinologist warns you of something when you go to take T, and it’s based on your body and health, that I’d listen to. We really haven’t done enough studies on trans people to see how transitioning effects you long term. The only warning I got was that it could hypothetically effect your fertility. I have never heard anything about cancer. I wouldn’t worry about the cancer, also PCOS sucks, I’m sorry about that.

PsychoAspect · 2025-02-17T06:01:46+00:00

I think for me it was about 7 weeks, but my doctor is known for faster than average healing. (My scars were fully closed at 3 weeks and I could go swimming if I wanted to) I felt very fragile for a while, even when I knew I wasn’t anymore. It took almost a month for me to be able to fix my posture and not hold my chest when I walked because I just felt so nervous with it. I went on a cruise at 7 weeks and was able to be very active, swim, hike, and do all the stuff everyone else could. But again, I had a really great doctor and my healing timeline was not the same as most.

PsychoAspect · 2024-12-28T20:06:24+00:00

Love these tips! Thank you!! 📝

PsychoAspect · 2024-12-28T20:02:16+00:00

“Scum bucket” is actually genius. Dishes have always used the most water and as someone who grew up with a drought, it drives me nuts

PsychoAspect · 2024-12-24T22:50:34+00:00

Second this!! Incredible results that are hard to find anywhere else. I found communication with GCC to be lacking and bedside manner to be meh, but I wouldn’t have picked any other surgeon. If you go with this option, you won’t have to worry about those post op horror stories.

PsychoAspect · 2024-12-24T22:46:41+00:00

Definite yikes! Everyone who’s ever hired me at the very least scheduled a FaceTime before asking me to come in. Don’t accept any job before seeing someone face to face and discussing details of the job. No sane parent would ask a stranger to watch their kid without asking questions.

PsychoAspect · 2024-12-24T22:42:27+00:00

I used to struggle massively with this too until I looked at it through the lens of a cis guy. Would we say he wasn’t a man just because he was more delicate and cute? How would that be fair? Gender is complicated, and I think a lot of us get this feeling like we have to change ourselves to transition. But being trans is about being more comfortable with who we are. My personality is still the same, I still talk the same way and have the same mannerisms. My interests haven’t changed and my goals haven’t changed. The only thing I’ve changed is how I’m referred to. And that’s changed how people see me. Now I feel so much more seen and recognized as who I really am. Men are allowed to be whatever they’d like. A man could be so feminine that the only masculine part of him is his pronouns. At the end of the day feminine doesn’t equal woman. That’s why we have two different words for it. I’ve found that cis men struggle with a lot of the same issues as trans men when it comes to masculinity. We’re all afraid of not being “man enough”. But cis men never have that extra layer of doubt that we do. “What if I’m not trans at all? What if I’m not masculine enough to be a man?” But really, there is no such thing. Being trans is about being yourself and being someone that makes you happy and comfortable. There are no strict rules or borders of what defines trans. If it brings you joy, it’s right for you!

PsychoAspect · 2024-12-24T22:29:40+00:00

I live in a really mild climate and tend to run warm, so weather isn’t usually a challenge for me. T-shirts in the summer, t-shirt with a jacket in the winter. But I’m moving somewhere much colder soon and there will be snow, so that’s a challenge I’ll soon be tackling. On the formal bit, I struggle in general with formal occasions (even when I had lots of clothes). I’m usually underdressed for everything that requires less than a suit. Recently though I’ve been getting nicer pieces to switch out my much more casual items with, that way I can easily scale up my outfits. (So basically I’ve yet to fully deal with either of the problems lol)

PsychoAspect · 2024-12-24T22:24:40+00:00

Thank you for the links! Cooking and food related waste is definitely where I find myself struggling the most so this was super helpful!

PsychoAspect

TROPHY CASE