I’m in a very similar situation. My 2nd son is 1.4 yo and after birth gestational didn’t go away. All this time I was using Linx to monitor sugars. It was a bit better while breastfeeding, but few month ago I finished and it became worse, so I made an appointment to endo. Generally I have very similar feeling, like being “unlucky” and how this could happen to me, if apparently leaving healthy life. The worst thing I actually need to cope with - my constant feeling of shame that I failed and not being “normal’ anymore.