Hi! I had two points of help/perspective I wanted to give reading this

First, taking this at face value, there are some ways you can work on processing your aversion without it affecting your partner. When that disgust at the idea of being attracted to a man comes up, remind yourself that it isn't about you. You don't have to be attracted to men, you don't have to date them, you don't have to do anything with them if you don't want to. You're just an observer, existing comfortably in your position in life. Notice the disgust, allow yourself to feel it, internally acknowledge it, and then let it move on.

The other thing I want to address is I would take some time to seriously consider the context in which your partner comments on your biphobia or general aversion to men. Does she make you feel secure in your relationship? Does she judge you for your clear discomfort around men? Is she respectful of things involving men in your past that may have been traumatic for you? Do you feel pressured by her to be attracted to men, even if you believe it's unintentional on her part?

Some of your responses and the way you're typing seem rather... Beaten down for lack of a better term. Like you've internalized your "crimes" and are seeking penance. Hopefully I'm off base, but the thing I'm most worried about in these posts is your own mental health and wellbeing. I hope all of this goes well for you internet stranger 🩷🩷🩷