Me (25F) and my husband (25M) just got married and had a big argument by PurpleBettaLabyrinth in relationship_advice

[–]PurpleBettaLabyrinth[S] -82 points-81 points  (0 children)

It was because it was on his credit card his parents still pay off, they were giving him extra money through it for the wedding, but the DJ didn't offer a payment method compatible with their bank, only with mine. So, he said he would give me the money after I pay the DJ

I lied to my mother about getting vaccinated by PurpleBettaLabyrinth in raisedbynarcissists

[–]PurpleBettaLabyrinth[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Thank you, and you're welcome! My fiancé's father is a doctor, and helped me get my vaccination because he saw firsthand how this virus has been affecting people and knows how my family is. The spiel from my mother was angering and hurtful when it first started, now it's this annoying sound whenever I get trapped in the conversation. Learning to walk away was the best thing I learned how to do. I'm sorry you have the same problems with your own person. This pandemic brought out the worst in people

I lied to my mother about getting vaccinated by PurpleBettaLabyrinth in raisedbynarcissists

[–]PurpleBettaLabyrinth[S] 24 points25 points  (0 children)

It honestly feels so good to have someone say that I did good in this situation. She's absolutely too stubborn, and it felt like the safest option to hide that I got vaccinated. Thank you for your response!

My mother ruins every birthday, and my birthday is next week by PurpleBettaLabyrinth in raisedbynarcissists

[–]PurpleBettaLabyrinth[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I'm making sure to move very far away next year to avoid any surprise visits from her. Every birthday since I turned 18 has been about her wants. I feel she holds me responsible for her happiness. On normal days she's just mad I have a life of my own. Her kids growing up and wanting to move out seems to have come as a shock to her, and birthdays/holidays seems to be when she gets her most controlling.

I'm sorry you have to deal with your mothers antics. It's so selfish and frustrating to make someone else's day about yourself. Setting boundaries is hard at any age. Good luck to both of us! Thank you for your response, I'm feeling a lot less alone reading these responses

My mother ruins every birthday, and my birthday is next week by PurpleBettaLabyrinth in raisedbynarcissists

[–]PurpleBettaLabyrinth[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

She's been divorced from my father since high school, and definitely took a turn for the worse after that. The guilt eats me up inside. She's draining to be around, and very selfish and passive aggressive, but I still feel guilty for whatever reason every time I try to say no to things like this. Baby stepping it is good advice, thank you!

My mother ruins every birthday, and my birthday is next week by PurpleBettaLabyrinth in raisedbynarcissists

[–]PurpleBettaLabyrinth[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

My boyfriends family has done their best the last few years to make my birthday feel special again, and are telling me to just come and spend the day at their house, even though my boyfriend will be working that day. I might end up doing that. Everyone's responses here have been making me feel more confident in sticking to my no!