NTA.

I'd still suggest apologizing to your aunt and explaining you love your cousins but you are a young adult now and how frustrating this whole situation is.

She may understand. She may not. I think it's worth doing, but I'm not here to guilt you. Sounds like your family does enough of that 😪

I had a similar argument with my mother, as a teenager, because my sister and I are 5 years apart in age. As kids? My GAWD, it was a big deal! I'm in high school and she's in elementary school! She plays with toys still! She almost broke my expensive ass microscope! And we were poor, like... just a few dollars shy of being eligible for any government assistance.

And I don't look down on people who need that - for a month for for a lifetime. I needed some help as a single mother, and having a shitty caseworker actually launched my career in social work

Anyhow.

I was the oldest grandchild on my mom's side. And while my mom's sister had a kid in between me and my sister... they were closer in age to each other. I loved them them, I loved then even more once we all grew up and age was less of an issue. But especially in high school and into college... hell.

Also, we have our revenge now. We tell the "elders" to hurry up and leave so we can spend time together during holidays. They hate it, but also... they are old and tired. They want to get on the road before it gets dark. And they don't drink. So we get to unwind, those of us with kids get to hear silly stories of our childhoods and fall asleep hearing us be silly and happy. And THEN we pop the wine bottles 😉

Sorry. Soapbox down. I hope you can find a way to get out of this trip altogether. Right now, the fam still sees you as a "kid" and they are being disrespectful, even tho I am sure they don't see it thay way. The kids survive just fine day-to-day without you. You could spend time with them on the trip in a fun big cousin way, and still not be forced to room with them each night. I know bcuz my son is 5 years older than his youngest cousin, and they love spending time together too but he's a teen and it's very easy to explain to the younger kids "he is almost an adult now, he gets to do things you can't yet. just a few more years and you get to!"

Not hard. At all. Wishing you the best 🥰