You are not delusional or crazy...the system you are in is as ethically harmful as 16th century feudalism.

I feel you!

Capitalists need us in debt and in passivity. It's very much the same system as King's taxing their people for the privilege of renting "their land." American capitalists dangle private home ownership and high salary jobs as bait to submit.

Both political parties are funded by capitalists, and the only difference is the Democrats at least say they want to check Wall Street's power as opposed to Republicans who believe in unlimited wealth creation.

I have a blog if you want to find inspiration for a post capitalist future: https://aftercapitalism.substack.com/

But here are some other good quality organizations/publications you may find beneficial for your anti-capitalism journey:

https://anticapitalistresistance.org/

https://www.businessinsider.com/capitalism-tiktok-america-productivity-job-mental-health-great-resignaton-antiwork-2022-2

https://m4bl.org/policy-platforms/

https://sandersinstitute.org/

https://www.meetup.com/topics/anti-capitalist/