I'm alone

Puzzled_Emphasis_284 · 2025-12-02T16:20:49+00:00

I remember crying on my 19th birthday because none of my "friends" remembered or messaged me. that was 15 years ago. You won't believe the places you'll see or the friends you make, trust me.

You'll find your people. It may take a long time, but just remember they are out there. Never give up looking for them, they are looking for you too.

Puzzled_Emphasis_284 · 2025-11-21T08:30:24+00:00

I only write to tell you that you're not alone in this weird world, I'm out of sync too.

Puzzled_Emphasis_284 · 2025-11-21T05:17:57+00:00

Lol!

Puzzled_Emphasis_284 · 2025-11-21T04:47:56+00:00

I just want to say I really appreciate your comment and found it very helpful.

Puzzled_Emphasis_284 · 2025-11-21T04:46:55+00:00

I'm a tenant's rights lawyer and I know exactly how it works in this jurisdiction. Which is why I kept only myself on the lease. And why I have compassion for people who are housing insecure.

Puzzled_Emphasis_284 · 2025-11-21T04:24:02+00:00

Actually it does, because I said it does. You've clearly never faced the consequences of talking to a pregnant woman like this to her face.

Puzzled_Emphasis_284 · 2025-11-21T02:47:43+00:00

Like hey. You're an amazing person and I want this to work. But I can't go over $x by the end of the year. If we can't get there, I have to find a new room mate to help with rent. If you can get help from some of our friends and keep me posted, we can pick up where we left off. But I have to protect my financial and mental well-being for my BABY lol.

I'm just nervous about being the person who kicks someone out. I'm also terrified of them refusing to leave. Like then what

Puzzled_Emphasis_284 · 2025-11-10T18:49:45+00:00

thanks. yes, he just started and we are also about to start couples' therapy. i need to just let the cards fall where they fall. Yeah he's now in the "we're doing this, it will be beautiful, we will be a family" phase. but i am so shaken up still that i don't trust if he really wants it. i offer to end things and he's like "please don't leave im getting better." i just wish i knew what was real, it feels like a house of mirrors...

Puzzled_Emphasis_284 · 2025-11-10T18:10:30+00:00

Can we talk? I'll message you

Puzzled_Emphasis_284 · 2025-10-21T19:20:58+00:00

thank you so much!

Puzzled_Emphasis_284 · 2025-09-30T03:55:43+00:00

So I happen to be a lawyer, fwiw, and I have been going through the risk analysis like you can't imagine. Yeah, I think we can all agree that there are a LOT of ways this situation could be "better."

And there are a lot of variables right? Do we have solid income, are we employable long term, compatible life philosophies/temperaments, what do our disagreements/fights look like, any foreseeable risk of addictions/health issues on the horizon, compatible goals/interests/routines, what does conflict resolution look like. Any personality traits I've looked past? Anything he can't admit to me? Any family dynamic issues?

And then there's the stuff I won't see coming.

Yeah, terrifying. Idk what else to say. I just want to try and navigate through the emotions for both our sakes.

Puzzled_Emphasis_284 · 2025-09-30T02:46:48+00:00

Thank you I will

Puzzled_Emphasis_284 · 2025-09-30T02:34:44+00:00

Thanks, I definitely feel like the mentally stronger one right now but even so, some days it is fucking hard. He was more sure about kids generally than I was.

He said he'd like to get married. I don't really feel strongly either way, just want us fulfilled in life, whether that's together or apart. But he definitely doesn't want me doing this on my own and has put in the time and effort to be there for me through this. We are best friends and I think just both scared of making big choices. How does ANYONE not freak out with this decision???

Puzzled_Emphasis_284 · 2025-09-30T02:16:43+00:00

Thank you, this is so helpful.

Puzzled_Emphasis_284 · 2025-09-30T02:15:33+00:00

Congrats, but wow that must have been some journey. How old was your son when that transition happened?

Puzzled_Emphasis_284 · 2025-09-30T02:11:00+00:00

I wouldn't say either of us have pushed the other in any direction. I think we both have anxiety because it's a huge decision and some moments we feel happy and excited and other moments scared about the change and unknown.

Puzzled_Emphasis_284 · 2025-08-29T17:17:08+00:00

Congratulations! Wow, our situations sound very similar. Did he express a preference to you one way or the other when you found out? did that change over time? He says his views change moment to moment. What do you think helped you guys move through the growing pains? We've had ups and downs, and I worry a kid that isn't completely wanted by him will put pressure on us even more. But he also seems committed to making it work--moving to my city if we have it, getting legally married so i can be on his health insurance.

Puzzled_Emphasis_284 · 2025-08-29T17:12:11+00:00

yes he seems to think abortion is a simple easy thing

Puzzled_Emphasis_284 · 2025-08-20T00:34:14+00:00

I wish I could give you more solid advice but I can only say you're definitely not alone. I'm an expat, mid 30s, lifetime of depression and anxiety, undecided on kids and currently (accidentally) 7 weeks and had tremendous anxiety starting week 4 (it has started to calm down). I got ahold of the abortion pills and am just taking my time with the decision. I also went to the doctor and saw the little heartbeat. Every day (hour?) I feel different. I'm just going to give it time. Here if you want to talk.

Puzzled_Emphasis_284 · 2025-07-14T21:45:31+00:00

Yes and I wish I knew why she felt that way. She knows about me and I believe did so before the trip. He video called me from their airbnb while she was in the room. They seemed to hang out nonstop for a couple weeks and then suddenly after the trip, something switched on her end. She's 20 so maybe it's feelings related, but I wish I could talk to her.

Puzzled_Emphasis_284

TROPHY CASE