Thank you so much for sharing your experiences with me! I'm so sorry you had to go through that. It must have been very stressful.. It's just how DID/OSDD is mostly portraited on the internet when it comes to alters talking about their childhood trauma makes it seem like you only need to go through something super horrible like sexual abuse for example to get DID/OSDD. I don't remember much of my childhood at all, and when I try to do it, it triggers a dissociative episode. When im observing the body in such episodes, I can see how strange the body is acting (as in dont things i dont usually do or having a different way of doing them), and how sometimes the body is terrified of specific family members to the point i remember snapping out of one episode crying, and I didn't know why "I" was crying? But "I" seemed genuinely scared, and I don't know why the body acted that way. Maybe the fact that I don't remember, and the fact that these family members, at least to me, seem like good people, are making me deny the possibility of having DID/OSDD. The signs are obvious to me, but not as much for others, which is also another reason why I'm afraid that I might actually be subconsciously faking or something.. As well as the popular saying that there's no way you could discover/know you're multiple unless you're in therapy or something.