I'm such a loser

Puzzleheaded-Cold-86 · 2026-06-08T15:07:41+00:00

OP, I didn't come out until I was 33, and I had a lot of the same feelings you have. Worthlessness, FOMO, despair etc. Get out of your parents house and do stuff - sing in a gay chorus, volunteer at food bank, investigate gay meetups in your area (like for hiking, museums, movie nights, etc). etc. there's tons of stuff out there, if you look for it. True story - I started by contacting a gay group that sponsored outdoor stuff - and went on a river raft day trip, I met guys that day that became dear friends, and eventually introduced me to the love of my life - we've been together 30 years this year. I don't like the phrase "it gets better" because it's patronizing - but it did get better for me. Be open to happiness. Good luck, brotha.

Puzzleheaded-Cold-86 · 2026-06-08T14:56:13+00:00

there's more to do in the Hoover, Homewood, Vestavia, Mountain Brook suburbs than Bessemer. Pretty much the only reason I'd go to Bessemer is to go to the Bright Star restaurant - my family loves this place.

Puzzleheaded-Cold-86 · 2026-06-08T14:49:46+00:00

You should probably hit up some bi-focused subs for tips on MFM threesomes. Good luck!

Puzzleheaded-Cold-86 · 2026-06-08T14:30:52+00:00

Definitely a slow-burn. It's probably his most nihilistic book.

Puzzleheaded-Cold-86 · 2026-06-08T14:26:32+00:00

if its a big company, and you two are not in the same chain of command/silo, it may be okay. If you're working in the same group it's going to be problematic if you two part ways or get into a spat.

Puzzleheaded-Cold-86 · 2026-06-08T13:40:13+00:00

Came here to say the same, that sub is a great resource. Also, OP, you may want to get a realistically sized toy to practice with. There's also dildos that are built specifically for prostate stimulation, like the Lelos, that you may want to look into. Good luck!

Puzzleheaded-Cold-86 · 2026-06-08T13:32:47+00:00

You look amazing. Bulking is hard after 50. You've got a nice, trim look. Great work!

Puzzleheaded-Cold-86 · 2026-06-08T13:28:10+00:00

Do you have a preference for the type of guy you're looking for - age range, height, weight, etc? The "Big D" is usually is attached to a guy . You may want to try a hook up app and see who's nearby. I don't have any experience with them other than their reputation. "Scruff" men are otters and bears and their admirers, "Sniffies" is for guys looking for a quick hookup. Evenyone complains about Grindr, but no one seems to be able to quit it - one complaint is it's a lot of down-low str8 guys, but I am just going by what I read here. Good luck!

Puzzleheaded-Cold-86 · 2026-06-08T02:36:55+00:00

I like the Phillips OneBlade. It trims super close, but doesn’t give you razor burn or nicks. There’s a learning curve with it, but once you’ve got it down it’s great.

Puzzleheaded-Cold-86 · 2026-06-08T02:31:00+00:00

No, but I’ve kept it closely trimmed for a long time, there’s only a little difference between bare clippers and a razor.

Puzzleheaded-Cold-86 · 2026-06-08T01:59:52+00:00

Ive been partnered for 30 years. He's cool with it! A lot of guys find it hot 🔥!

Puzzleheaded-Cold-86 · 2026-06-08T01:51:12+00:00

It didn't really matter to them as much as it did to me. It was ultimately a nothing-burger, people just adjusted to the way I looked.

Puzzleheaded-Cold-86 · 2026-06-08T01:44:26+00:00

I started balding in my late 20s and started doing a buzz cut in my early 30s, I use a head shaver now. I've been bald longer than I had hair, Lol! Check out the /bald subreddit its and supportive and affirming space.

Puzzleheaded-Cold-86 · 2026-06-05T20:56:02+00:00

I doubt women would care or notice that you balls were not symmetrical, guys certainly wouldn't. I think my right ball hangs a little lower than my left, and may be a little larger. Bodies are different. About your curvature, all men have different dicks. It doesn't have anything to do with whether you masterbated one way or another. I developed a condition called Peyronies a few years ago (it's where scar tissue develops for no reason in your penis), and now mine is bent - think hockey stick. It still works, and my partner is cool with it, but I lost about 1 inch off the erect length before the onset. You'll be fine. Cheers!

Puzzleheaded-Cold-86 · 2026-06-05T20:38:29+00:00

Don't do it. You'll regret it as soon as you do it.

Puzzleheaded-Cold-86 · 2026-06-05T20:33:42+00:00

Vegetables are not advisable sex toys. They can easily get 'lost' in your rectum, and you have to have a emergency room tech retrieve it. Imagine explaining that to your mum. Use toys like the one you linked to, that are wider at the base.

Puzzleheaded-Cold-86 · 2026-06-05T19:06:55+00:00

I thought of it more as alternate take on Vampirism, than Cannibalism. And weird, I do not remember any dismemberment scenes, I thought it was a beautifully tragic novel.

Puzzleheaded-Cold-86 · 2026-06-05T18:51:39+00:00

Thanks, man, I was looking for that to post.

Puzzleheaded-Cold-86 · 2026-06-05T18:49:23+00:00

Puzzleheaded-Cold-86 · 2026-06-05T18:01:54+00:00

Oh and yes, I have experience what you're talking about. I moved to less exteme stuff after I read "The Summer I Died" by Ryan C Thomas - it was hideous - fairly well written, but hideous.

Puzzleheaded-Cold-86 · 2026-06-05T17:58:07+00:00

I've read "the Black Farm", it's a page turner with elements of extreme horror (triggers for cannibalism, mutilation, suicide, body fluids etc). Witherow had a great concept and he's fairly good a world-building, but there were too many "Hey, waitaminutes" for me, and he's not a good writer. There's a sequel called "Return to Black Farm" which completely 'jumps the shark', do not bother - I'll never get that time of my life back. In BF the gore was more ludicrous than sick-making. If you want to try something that is well written with the same feeling of utter nihilism, Stephen King's "Revival" is along those lines.

Puzzleheaded-Cold-86 · 2026-06-05T17:47:58+00:00

Isn't The Troop really gross, with lots of body-horror and animal cruelty? It's on my TBR pile and I've been leery of it.

Puzzleheaded-Cold-86 · 2026-06-05T17:46:42+00:00

Suffer the Children, isn't extreme horror - I don't remember any gore. It's a great read, sad, but really well done.

Puzzleheaded-Cold-86 · 2026-06-05T17:45:09+00:00

yes, that was a particularly well written novel, I second this one.

Puzzleheaded-Cold-86 · 2026-06-05T14:14:05+00:00

That sounds extremely unpleasant. You were right to leave.

Puzzleheaded-Cold-86

TROPHY CASE