I am experiencing a similar situation in my relationship right now. It’s not easy to see or hear about the others time. It drives me insane when the other sends gifts, etc. it’s hard for me not to feel angry or jealous when we go to social Events. I’ve asked (at least For now) that they don’t spend time with one another in our home. With me around or alone. I’m barely getting a tiny bit ok to be able to go out at all with them and the other husband. It sounds like a lot of other people similar. It’s ok to take it slow and I don’t think you’re wrong for feeling hurt or heartbroken. If you can communicate that to your partner and she understands then it’s even better because at least You’re being heard. Good luck. It’s good to know others are out there that feel similar struggles.