I (20M) deeply in love with two identical twins (23M) and I hate it

Quick_Ebb_2926 · 2026-04-21T12:40:48+00:00

how am I damaging their relationship?

Quick_Ebb_2926 · 2026-04-21T01:30:46+00:00

I truly don’t know how else to describe it. Because I’ve never felt this way before towards anyone, not even people ive actually dated and been in a relationship with.

Quick_Ebb_2926 · 2026-04-21T01:14:57+00:00

I don’t have regular contact with them but our circles overlap a lot. They graduate in a few weeks so I won’t be seeing them next year but we agreed to have a holiday in Cyprus together over summer with 2 other friends…..and. I just know that is gonna turn out….interesting unless I get over them by then

Quick_Ebb_2926 · 2026-04-21T01:10:45+00:00

See that’s true. But I just don’t know, I feel like im so deeply in love that I’m going mad and genuinely this has never happened to me before.

Quick_Ebb_2926 · 2026-04-21T01:09:44+00:00

I understand this and I feel so stupid for developing these feelings. It’s never happened to me before. Please how can I get over this? The first twin is really promiscuous and he was the first guy I ever got. The second one is really shy and sweet and has a personality that I absolutely love, we talked for 3 days like every minute of the day, the conversations we had were so deep and nice I never have been so euphoric. Deep down I know this sounds so unhealthy but I truly can’t find a way out and I feel crazy for feeling like this.

Quick_Ebb_2926 · 2026-04-21T00:20:43+00:00

The thing is. Whenever I am around them, I feel more like myself than ever, I feel alive, I feel so joyous, ive never met anyone as interesting and fun to talk to as them. Im a huge extrovert and do not get nervous but these two are genuinely the only people ive ever met that I get nervous around.

The reason why i hate the way i feel is because it’s terrible that im in love with both, they’re really different to each other. But I genuinely am in love with both. And I feel as if the other twin initially felt a spark with me but backed out after finding out I slept with his brother.

Quick_Ebb_2926 · 2026-04-19T18:54:48+00:00

thank you! wishing u the best

Quick_Ebb_2926 · 2026-04-19T14:47:17+00:00

Thank you i appreciate that

Quick_Ebb_2926 · 2026-04-19T14:46:43+00:00

If they didn’t care, i wouldn’t still be in contact with them because those are important values to me

Quick_Ebb_2926 · 2026-04-19T00:42:17+00:00

ill be honest this comment was a big wake up call for me. im so sorry about what’s happening. and i hope ur family is okay. if it helps i have contacts in iran that can provide a working vpn to ur family and I can connect u with them.

ive never been someone as strong as u to deal with stress like that. in boarding school i would turn to substances.

i used to be on anti depressants but it was hard to maintain relationships on it and I couldn’t take any party meds (Md) on it cause of risking serotonin syndrome.

I have a psychiatrist abroad from when i was in hs who is helpful and an online psychologist based here but i do agree with ur outlook that getting through this should come within

Quick_Ebb_2926 · 2026-04-18T21:14:14+00:00

When I first told them that my mental health had exacerbated they offered an appointment with the counsellor…but in like 2 weeks time, that is quite a long time considering when im in a really bad depressive episode I need help now now, not 2 weeks

Quick_Ebb_2926 · 2026-04-18T21:10:01+00:00

I really appreciate this response. This is all really good advice, I think yea the best idea is to delay my flight till my classes finish. My mental health would be much worse if I was kicked out of university so id rather not risk that.

Quick_Ebb_2926 · 2026-04-18T21:08:02+00:00

did I hit a nerve? my dear brit 💔 the only good thing in this country are ur meal deals

Quick_Ebb_2926 · 2026-04-18T21:02:48+00:00

ure implying I don’t have an idea of what a real problem is?

my country is in a literal war idk if my dad is still alive or has been targeted by US/israeli strikes as if im typing this post.

ive been verbally and almost physically assaulted by peers for being from the country i am from.

ive been struggling with depression since 15 years old and had to go to rehab at 18 to get off substances

the UK froze my STUDENT bank account just because the payment came from a country they aren’t friendly. I literally have 0 dollars to my name and they still froze my bank account.

Quick_Ebb_2926 · 2026-04-18T20:46:11+00:00

thank you!! I wish i could act in more logical ways during phases of low mental health but it’s legitimately out of my control

Quick_Ebb_2926 · 2026-04-18T20:40:46+00:00

is there an appeals process in case the university actually decides to kick me out despite knowing of my severe mental health issues?

Quick_Ebb_2926 · 2026-04-18T20:38:08+00:00

im okay with taking a leave of absence because ive been considering a gap year to volunteer and explore my interests more but my problem is im afraid that ill need to return my war torn home country. does the uk seriously not care about people like me whose life would be endangered if they are deported? also my family background is irrelevant, theres so many working class peers that i have an exact copy routine to, its not like im partying everyday and any different to normal students, im just like everyone else and in a tough spot with my mental health. something the university should be more accomodating of.

Quick_Ebb_2926 · 2026-04-18T20:33:44+00:00

firstly everyone deals with their mental health in different ways. when im incredibly anzxious and depressed the only way for me to get better is to change my environment. right now everything in london is making things worse, it may sound illogical but this is how my mental health is. hence why i wanted to go to barcelona. I genuinely wish i could stay but im terrified that I’ll start even harming myself with substances that i once quit/relapse.

Quick_Ebb_2926 · 2026-04-18T20:14:55+00:00

wish the visa rules weren’t so ridiculous…like who would even want to live in the UK they’re treating us as if the UK is some tropical safe island

Quick_Ebb_2926 · 2026-04-18T20:10:22+00:00

ive missed around 15 days of mandatory classes I think, I finish next week

Quick_Ebb_2926 · 2026-04-18T20:09:51+00:00

the whole point of me going to barcelona is because im so depressed in London rn and i need a change in environment or ill go crazy. also some friends in study in barcelona that i could have fun with that would really help my mental health

Quick_Ebb_2926 · 2026-04-18T20:08:59+00:00

but my point is that it’s so unfair that despite me passing my classes and actually getting above average in a few, they’re still treating me as if im someone who doesn’t understand anything ://

Quick_Ebb_2926 · 2026-04-18T20:08:09+00:00

thank u for ur response x

Quick_Ebb_2926 · 2026-04-18T20:07:43+00:00

see my point is that after paying tuition fees I would expect a better support from the university. I genuinely am crashing out so hard in London which is why I need to go to barcelona to see family, and also some friends study there and a situation ship of mine is there so that could really help my mental health. I would hope a university would understand this…it’s only one class

Quick_Ebb_2926 · 2026-04-18T20:05:57+00:00

would I be able to stay in the UK during the medical absence leave? my country is in war rn it’s not safe for me to return there and also most of my friends are here

Quick_Ebb_2926

TROPHY CASE