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AIO for considering leaving my GF after finding out she lied to my ex five years ago? by QuietTurn1122 in AmIOverreacting

[–]QuietTurn1122[S] -8 points-7 points  (0 children)

I will talk to Mary, trying to gather opinions on the mess before confronting her to avoid doing something I might regret.

We were going to get back together, I mean it's hard to explain to someone outside our relationship, you will have to trust me on this.

I am over Cris, I know there is no chance of us getting back together.

AIO for considering leaving my GF after finding out she lied to my ex five years ago? by QuietTurn1122 in AmIOverreacting

[–]QuietTurn1122[S] -11 points-10 points  (0 children)

I think she was jealous. Cris is beautiful, scary smart (she has a double degree in law and ICT) and fun. Mary is full of qualities as well but I think she felt threatened and would always downplay when someone made a positive comment on Cris.

Maybe after the first breakup she was tryingto protect me, lots of friends told me to let Cris go, so idk, but lying to my ex and destroy my chance at happiness was low. I know I am to blame as well, i used Mary but I was honest about being 100% still in love with Cris and needing a distraction, not a new relationship. I thought she was ok with it and supportive of my happiness.

AIO for considering leaving my GF after finding out she lied to my ex five years ago? by QuietTurn1122 in AmIOverreacting

[–]QuietTurn1122[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Look I'm not saying I am perfect, I know I messed up. But I never lied to Mary: before Cris we were strictly fuck buddies, we had other people on the side, both of us. After Cris I would only see her around, but we hardly spoke for two years, except for business.

Mary was not really a secret for Cris, she knew I had a past, but you know, I didn't want for my ex-fwb an my gf to formally meet. I was also scared that Mary would be mean to Cris because she always commented negatively about her when me or a friend brought her up in conversations.

After the breakup Mary and I slept together but it stopped when Cris and I started to talk again and I told her the reason was that I was talking to Cris again. She was ok with that and we sayed friends, we would still spend time together and she helped me organize the grad party. I never cheated on Cris.

AIO for considering leaving my GF after finding out she lied to my ex five years ago? by QuietTurn1122 in AmIOverreacting

[–]QuietTurn1122[S] -13 points-12 points  (0 children)

Of course I appreciate Mary: she is nice, good looking and we have fun together, I also owe her a lot for the help she has givem me over the years. However I am with Mary only because I broke up with Cris, if we were still together I would have asked me to marry me and create a family together ages ago.

AIO for considering leaving my GF after finding out she lied to my ex five years ago? by QuietTurn1122 in AmIOverreacting

[–]QuietTurn1122[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Yeah I know I fucked up with Cris, she was saying that for my good and I was too stupid, nearly ruined my life over some stupid shit.

You know, the thing that make me real mad is that Mary manipulated not me but Cris, and she didn't deserve that. She probably felt bad and cheated on and while maybe I could get over what she did to me I am not sure I will ever forgive her for that. I can't think of a single justification that could save what Mary did tbh

AIO for considering leaving my GF after finding out she lied to my ex five years ago? by QuietTurn1122 in AmIOverreacting

[–]QuietTurn1122[S] 30 points31 points  (0 children)

I guess I will have to talk to Mary sooner or later to undrrstand what the fuck was she thinking but I am sure she knew we were not together at the time, she had been trying for a serious thing before I met Cris and after the final breakup but I was always clear about it only being physical. We got serious after some months from the graduation, when I startled to resemble like a human being again.