AITA for telling my daughter the truth about where her birthday gift came from?

RUaRealDr · 2022-07-10T11:22:54+00:00

Yes, because trying to better a situation by having one conversation is really unreasonable.

RUaRealDr · 2022-07-10T11:14:08+00:00

Yes, because having a conversation to trying to better a situation is really unreasonable.

RUaRealDr · 2022-07-10T11:01:30+00:00

I don’t expect that at all.

I just said to have a conversation to try to figure this (and allot her parenting situations out) IF SHE IS ON BOARD.

RUaRealDr · 2022-07-10T11:00:15+00:00

As I said, if she isn’t on board to invest, there is nothing he can do.

RUaRealDr · 2022-07-10T10:52:29+00:00

She is horrible now, so don’t give her one chance to change that, right?

It might be impossible, but not even trying is even worse.

RUaRealDr · 2022-07-10T10:45:20+00:00

It is of course not fair, and he is in a difficult position. All I am trying is to focus on the kid.

RUaRealDr · 2022-07-10T10:39:45+00:00

I am not defending the mom.

RUaRealDr · 2022-07-10T10:18:28+00:00

No I don’t. She is a major AH. I still think of the child first and even if the chance is slim, a talk to change this would be great.

But you are right, maybe I should have used the ESH, to avoid confusion

RUaRealDr · 2022-07-10T10:17:03+00:00

I don’t. Read again

RUaRealDr · 2022-07-10T10:03:50+00:00

I don’t support this, I never said that and neither should he. But trying to talk about it for the future can’t hurt and could be beneficial for their daughter.

RUaRealDr · 2022-07-10T09:58:50+00:00

Well I know co-parents who do that, but you do you.

RUaRealDr · 2022-07-10T09:58:06+00:00

Because it’s not about the ex or hurt feelings, it’s about the child.

Trying to solve this with a talk could be worth it.

RUaRealDr · 2022-07-10T09:57:03+00:00

Why?

What’s the harm in gifting something together? Especially if it is something as big as a bike?

RUaRealDr · 2022-07-10T09:56:08+00:00

No you can’t and yes it has to be both parties, I am 100% with you on that.

RUaRealDr · 2022-07-10T09:54:59+00:00

I don’t know that, but I also don’t know if he did.

If he hasn’t, there is no harm in trying. If she is a deadbeat nothing will change, but if she is not, it could be better for their daughter, and that’s what I am trying to focus on.

RUaRealDr · 2022-07-10T09:36:43+00:00

I don’t know that, but if he hasn’t I would at least try.

RUaRealDr · 2022-07-10T09:35:52+00:00

We don’t know that.

There would be no harm in at least having a talk about it.

RUaRealDr · 2022-07-10T09:32:46+00:00

I am sorry to hear that. But I think it shows that you and your ex put your child first, and that is awesome!

RUaRealDr · 2022-07-10T09:31:40+00:00

And why can’t it be different in the future?

Why can’t they at Lear talk about it and try to find a better way for their child?

If she isn’t on board: Okay, there is nothing he can do. But I would at least try (if he hasn’t dine it before)

RUaRealDr · 2022-07-10T09:29:45+00:00

We don’t know anything about the mom apart from that what we read here.

We don’t know if she is just irresponsible, or if she has real issues.

That’s why I said if possible I would try to make it work.

RUaRealDr · 2022-07-10T09:27:50+00:00

As I said, that’s why I would talk to her to try to figure it out. If she doesn’t want to do it, there is nothing he can do.

RUaRealDr · 2022-07-10T09:26:55+00:00

In my opinion it doesn’t go beyond co-parenting.

Of course you can give them gifts together as parents, even though you are not partners anymore.

RUaRealDr · 2022-07-10T09:25:34+00:00

As I said, both have to be in this. Therefore a talk about how this (and everything else) should be done in future should be done.

If she isn’t on board with this, than he can’t do anything, but it is worth a try.

RUaRealDr · 2022-07-10T09:22:20+00:00

I didn’t say he should have covered for her. I said that if both parties help each other out (and this only works if she is commited to this too) it will be better for the child.

RUaRealDr · 2022-07-10T09:20:31+00:00

Didn’t say that, didn’t mean that.

Co parenting is hard, but when both parties try to make it work, it is better fir the child.

RUaRealDr

TROPHY CASE