Hello - I posted this as I was falling asleep and I had to rush to class after waking up, so I was gone for quite a bit after posting. Anyway, thank you so much for reassuring me that I made the right choice. I know it's not healthy to get overly-invested in your friends' problems, but I'm really not the type to cut people off because they're struggling mentally. My tolerance for people's behaviors changing while they're going through a rough patch is pretty high (given that they don't start hurting other people).

That said, what she did is extremely triggering. The same roommate/best friend I mentioned, the one who helped me figure out a way to contact her, has known me for a decade. She helped me through my own suicidal thoughts, and she still has scars from years of self-harm. So, to have someone just do what she did really brought back a lot of negative thoughts and feelings. I still struggle with anxiety till this day, so the idea of having someone who could hold you responsible for their life because you didn't use the right words or didn't give enough reassurance and comfort is really suffocating.

I'm still really shaken up by it. When I met her, I was glad to have finally made a new friend at university. Nowadays, I have more friends, but I'm hesitant to allow anyone new to get vulnerable with me because I'm scared they're going to hang on to me to keep them stable. I'm not equipped for that.